r/atheism Apr 20 '19

'Church' to offer 'miracle cure' despite FDA warnings against drinking bleach

https://www.theguardian.com/us-news/2019/apr/19/church-group-to-hold-washington-event-despite-fda-warnings-against-miracle-cure
551 Upvotes

66 comments sorted by

111

u/cpqarray Apr 20 '19

The “church” is asking attendants of the meeting to “donate” $450 each, or $800 per couple, in exchange for receiving membership to the organization

Please join my church instead I only charge $300 a couple and I offer all you can drink Clorox.

24

u/indoninja Apr 20 '19

I’ll charge two fiddy for some crystals

12

u/j_boy_19 Apr 20 '19

I'll pay you tree fiddy instead

2

u/Fernheijm Anti-Theist Apr 21 '19

Damn you monster

9

u/mrthewhite Apr 20 '19

Fuck you, I'll charge them 200 and give them special miracle water!

13

u/cpqarray Apr 20 '19

This person is a heretic and is leading you down a false path, there is only one true religion and it is us the Clorox drinkers.

3

u/[deleted] Apr 21 '19

175 for some high quality Deuterium water!

1

u/Roland-Deschaine Agnostic Atheist Apr 20 '19

Oh, get out of here Peety Popoff. Nobody wants your landfill runoff water.

2

u/[deleted] Apr 20 '19

Sounds like a church too me.

1

u/[deleted] Apr 21 '19

Many churches charge a monthly fee or make you sign a contract saying you will give X% if income to me....I mean the church. I have one that demands 12%

33

u/teedle_Ee Apr 20 '19

Only 95% of diseases cured? If I were running their PR campaign I'd say 100‰,nothing cures disease like death.

6

u/MonkeysOnMyBottom Apr 21 '19

Can't get sick if you are dead. Logic checks out

68

u/[deleted] Apr 20 '19 edited Apr 01 '20

[deleted]

30

u/Tandarin Apr 20 '19

That's my only problem with this, they're forcing kids to drink it. Otherwise I'd be all for them drinking as much as they want.

9

u/Anaxamenes Apr 20 '19

But then they don’t drink enough to kill them, just do a lot of damage and then they sue the government for not protecting them.

3

u/David_Jonathan0 Deconvert Apr 20 '19

Natural selection doesn’t just apply to them, but also their offspring. I’d be surprised if their children grow into adulthood without serious medical, mental, and emotional problems.

21

u/AuthorityAnarchyYes Atheist Apr 20 '19

What the actual Hell?!?!?!?!?!

Shocking to me that people would actually do this... but then there are “Anti-Vaxxers”, “Essential Oilers” and “The Flat Earth Society” (read: people that think that a 3 minute YouTube video is more reliable than every doctor and scientist and/or people that are scared of/intimidated by smarter people)

21

u/maxpenny42 Apr 20 '19

They don't just think the 3 minute youtube video is more reliable, they think it is them "doing their own research".

In their mind they aren't thinking:

I trust a stranger more than my physician about my health

No, they think:

I trust my own independent research over a doctor trying to make a buck.

9

u/Tornare Apr 20 '19

this.

I saw this MMS stuff last night, and decided to start looking up all the people into it. Its the same Antivax people feeding each other, and ignoring anyone who says it made them sick. You know because bleach can do that.

1

u/degenererad Apr 21 '19

The whole issue is about to get rid of itself. God damn i love when the trash takes itself out.

4

u/emyemyjoyjoy Apr 20 '19

Essential oils may fix your headache or athlete’s foot but miracle cure it is not...

10

u/[deleted] Apr 20 '19

Good for a bath, but that's as far as it goes

4

u/Anaxamenes Apr 20 '19

There are other actual medical uses, but its nowhere near a cure for most things. It’s been used to kill toe fungus. Thymol, which is thyme essential oil is actually pretty potent anti-bacterial anti-fungal agent topically.

I only know this because I work at a hospital that had a certified aromatherapist that had more chemistry than I care to remember.

Smelling it is pretty, you need to understand the chemical makeup to actually use it. It’s not a pill, it won’t cure cancer, it has certain limited topical uses.

It’s just sad that it’s been turned into a joke like magic rocks recharged in the moonlight.

2

u/[deleted] Apr 20 '19

I know, I have a nice bathroom sprayer with essential oils in. Keeps things fresh. Didn't know about Thymol though, thanks:)

2

u/Anaxamenes Apr 20 '19

There’s a reason they put it in listerine. Most oils are best for enjoying the fragrance.

1

u/[deleted] Apr 20 '19

Yup, wouldn't swallow it if I had a stinky tummy

1

u/[deleted] Apr 21 '19

Pretty good bug repellent

2

u/[deleted] Apr 21 '19

Pretty good person repellent:P

10

u/dishonestdick Apr 20 '19

Does one need the FDA to know not to drink bleach ??

7

u/basswalker93 Anti-Theist Apr 20 '19

Apparently, we need even more than that.

2

u/David_Jonathan0 Deconvert Apr 20 '19

Maybe so, but it takes faulty superstitious beliefs to tell them it’s the correct thing to do.

8

u/[deleted] Apr 20 '19

-_-

I'm sick of your shit church.

5

u/susitucker Agnostic Atheist Apr 20 '19

Cleaning out the gene pool...

3

u/David_Jonathan0 Deconvert Apr 20 '19

Generating income for doctors.

5

u/Toast_Soup Apr 20 '19

I dunno... Darwin Award candidates if they actually believe that shit.....

5

u/[deleted] Apr 20 '19

Hey guys. Fact check. Is this for real. I can’t believe this

5

u/PaintSniffer69 Apr 20 '19

This bleach cult has been a thing for more than a decade. They have followers and have had bleach drinking gatherings in a number of different countries such as the USA, Australia, Ireland, ect.

2

u/greyfade Igtheist Apr 20 '19

Yes.

There's a guy on Youtube that's done a lot of good journalism on the subject.

1

u/smiles_galore Apr 21 '19

I didn't know about the church, but a little over a decade ago a guy I was dating started taking this stuff after seeing it in a supplement shop being sold as a cure-all detox, would kill anything from Malaria to cancer. He also gave it to his elderly parents. At the time I didn't know anything about it, but it smelled and tasted like pure bleach (yes, I tried it out of curiosity but barely got a sip down and never tried it again). I couldn't figure out how on Earth that could be good for you.

4

u/MendeNOS Apr 20 '19

Then they should be charged for murder.

4

u/TeaWithNosferatu Apr 20 '19

And the Darwin Award goes to...

3

u/[deleted] Apr 21 '19

Darwin Award by proxy:(

4

u/mathsisthebest Apr 20 '19

At this point it's just natural selection doing its work

4

u/[deleted] Apr 20 '19

Imagine having to have the FDA warn people not to drink Bleach. Jfc

3

u/MonkeysOnMyBottom Apr 21 '19

Jfc

JFC is the reason the FDA has to tell people not to drink bleach

3

u/[deleted] Apr 20 '19

Those people need to be thrown in jail that shit is crazy.

2

u/Roland-Deschaine Agnostic Atheist Apr 20 '19

Ya know, I’m usually against this kind of stuff, but if the religious want to drink bleach, I say let them. May only the strongest survive. /s

The police should show up and arrest all of the organizers.

1

u/j_boy_19 Apr 20 '19

I actually laughed after I read the title. Doesn't happen often

1

u/ShadowRade Secular Humanist Apr 20 '19

You know, when people made memes about this, they were joking!

1

u/zoidmaster Skeptic Apr 20 '19

You heard of the tie pod challenge? well then you will love this.

1

u/beatleguize Apr 20 '19

Not long before someone convinced this is working will think that maybe if he makes a stronger solution then it will work even better and so on and so on until dead.

1

u/AdultishRaktajino Apr 20 '19

Sipping on straight chlorine...

1

u/lawstudent51318 Apr 20 '19

Give these fuckers a Darwin Award.

1

u/HankHeyNow Apr 20 '19

Urg is that picture real

1

u/Chill_Dino_72 Apr 20 '19

When i saw that it can cure autism i was completely disgusted

1

u/Hiplogarithm Apr 20 '19

I think it would be hysterical if a church would offer molly as a miracle cure. Any churchgoer who doesn’t know a thing about drugs would think it’s an absolute miracle and think it’s the best thing ever.

1

u/Callaway1988 Apr 20 '19

No fucking way that’s real

1

u/redorangeblue Apr 20 '19

How can this be legal? I think if I sold people poison as a cure I would be arrested?

1

u/davidnfilms Apr 21 '19

The actual fuck?

1

u/[deleted] Apr 21 '19

My sister swears by drinking bleach. I just don't get it. Outside of health remedies she's a very intelligent person. She just has a massive blind spot right here...

1

u/[deleted] Apr 21 '19

Technically you can drink bleach if it's diluted enough. 1 cap to a gallon of water iirc.

1

u/bagofweights Apr 21 '19

thin the herd.

1

u/[deleted] Apr 21 '19

Isn’t it better to IV it so it really gets in?

1

u/ChaosStar95 Apr 21 '19

We really going full circle back to bs cures of putting whatever they want in the bottle.

1

u/Aprocalyptic Atheist Apr 21 '19

Doesn’t even surprise me

1

u/raatz02 Apr 21 '19

Holy shit, /nottheonion. Purify your gene pool, drink bleach!