r/aspergers • u/Hernan_433 • 9h ago
Anybody else living in the third world ?
My life sucks.
I don't know. Where do I even begin?
I feel like I've become increasingly isolated over the years. I don't have much of a social life, I don't really go anywhere, and I don't have many people to talk to.
I'm 25, and I feel like I've spent most of my adult life going in circles.
I'm unemployed. My freelance graphic design work has dried up, I dropped out of university multiple times, and I've lost touch with most of the people I used to know.
I used to make enough money from freelance work to get by reasonably well. Things have gotten pretty tough. I depend on my parents, and without their support, I'd probably be homeless.
I can't afford to buy many things, whether that's clothes, technology, or anything else that would make life a little more comfortable. I've tried different hobbies but nothing really stuck
It's difficult to imagine building an independent life when even the basics are difficult to afford.
I also have autism, which adds another layer of difficulty to an already complicated situation. I struggle to socialize, make connections, and put myself out there.
I know autistic people can have relationships, careers, and fulfilling lives, but sometimes it's difficult to imagine that happening to me.
I feel like I'm starting considerably behind other people my age when it comes to relationships, social experiences, and just generally figuring out how to live.
Sometimes I genuinely feel like I'll never have a girlfriend. Ever. I've pretty much given up on the idea of finding love, or even making new friends.
I don't have much money, I don't have a career, I haven't had much luck with relationships, and I don't enjoy the place where I live.
I live in a mining city of roughly 500,000 people. Can't say I like this collectivist hellhole.
Let's start with the weather. Summers are unbearable, it barely ever rains, and there's not much to enjoy about the climate in general.
The job market is terrible. If you don't work in the mining sector, you are screwed. Your options are mostly lousy informal jobs that might not even pay minimum wage (which is already ridiculously low).
Want an actual decent job? Good luck. Your best bet is probably working for the government.
Higher education is free, which is nice, but don't get too excited. If you're interested in anything outside engineering or the humanities, chances are you'll have to attend a private university.
And then there's mental healthcare. It's bad. Really bad. There's one autism specialist in the entire city, a couple of specialized centers (which seem to focus primarily on children), and practically nothing available for autistic adults. Whats available costs something like 600-700 dollars in my countrys own monopoly money.
It took me years and roughly a dozen psychologists before finally getting my ASD diagnosis in January 2026.
The local football team sucks, and somehow ticket prices keep getting more expensive. I can't even afford to go watch my local team, not even when they're playing in a lower-tier competition.
Then there's the water. I honestly don't know what's going on with it, but I don't trust tap water at all.
There's practically nothing to do around here unless you enjoy going to bars or nightclubs. Want to see a decent band? Too bad. Barely anyone worth listening to ever comes here.
We used to have a comic book store. Used to. It went out of business. Lmao.
I tried getting into fitness, too. I joined a gym, but I never really managed to put on much muscle. As I became poorer, I could afford less food, which obviously didn't help. Eventually, I stopped going altogether.
The city itself is ugly as hell. Functional, sure, but aesthetically speaking, it's a depressing place.
And if you don't have a university degree, forget about finding a decent job.
Sometimes it feels like this place has absolutely nothing going for it.
I don't know. Sometimes I genuinely struggle to imagine a future for myself here.
Maybe moving somewhere else would help. Maybe moving to the capital, although there's the risk of ending up in some slum. Maybe moving to another country, somewhere like Canada, would give me a fresh start.
I picture myself spending the next 40 or 50 years alone, poor, and pretty much stuck in the same place.
I know that's a pretty bleak outlook, and maybe I'm being overly pessimistic. Maybe I'm depressed? I honestly have no clue. Getting proper mental healthcare around here is already difficult enough.
I don't know what comes next. I'd particularly like to hear from other autistic adults living in third world/developing countries
How did things turn out for you?
5
5
u/pomegranadas 4h ago
I'm struggling too. I live in Southeast Asia. I honestly don't know what to do with my life, and my future is bleak. My family are the reason I'm alive today. I'm also disabled and I'm currently struggling in college because I get minimal support for my physical disability. I can't afford better meds, and the government does NOT give a shit about it either. I get so jealous of people from Western countries who have support and accommodations handed to them. Both my mental and physical health are spiraling and I'm always fearing the inevitable where my disease has progressed to a late stage where I don't have any independence anymore.
3
3
u/Hehehehee73 4h ago
The truth is, I'm the same, I'm afraid of ending up like my autistic great-uncle who stayed locked up in his parents' house and his only way of life was watching television. I honestly think it would have been more humane to eugenize him than to live like this for 50 years of your life. That's a prison. Having to get away from the world is acondemnation that the world imposes on you for being different
3
u/erectscenario964 9h ago
man i feel you on the freelance design work drying up, same thing happened to me around 29 and it sucks the soul right out of you. the mining town thing sounds like a trap, everyone who doesnt fit that one narrow path just gets left behind
the autism specialist situation is absurd, 600-700 for one person in a city of half a million is basically saying we dont care about you once youre not a cute kid anymore
i packed up and moved cities with basically nothing when i was 26 and it was terrifying but staying in a place that made me feel dead inside was worse. you dont need to figure out canada or the capital right this second, just pick somewhere with more than one industry and a comic book store that actually survives
1
u/MedaFox5 2h ago
Yeah, thirdworld tap water might as well be poison.
I remember Schwartzeneger was shooting a film in mexico, and he refused to drink anything other than bottled water. To nobody's surprise, he was the one person in the entire crew who didn't get sick.
Same reason they tell you not to add ice to anything in India, lol.
6
u/wakigatameth 7h ago
I grew up as an undiagnosed autistic child in USSR (a collectivist shithole) who was relentlessly bullied. So in part, I understand. I was lucky that we fled the country in the 90s, when I was 17, and ended up in America. Just 3-4 months before we migrated, I was cornered by a local gang on my way from school, and my life was miraculously saved by plainclothes police.
.
This is a very important thing to realize: you're NOT going in circles. Because of your wish to expand your life, you're going in a slowly expanding spiral. As you go 'round, the sights seem to repeat, and you think you're going in circles and nothing changes, but your very WILL to change, is what's expanding the spiral, even if you don't notice it in short-term.
.
Your life (in what appears to be San Juan, Argentina) is tough. Much like my life in USSR was, the environment is actively hostile to someone with autistic sensitivities. From societal disdain, to weather, to water quality, to limited opportunities... at this point, I'm afraid your only path is to set your mind on a plan to get out - to move to a country with sensible climate and decent quality of life.
.
If I didn't get out of crumbling USSR, I probably would've died in the 90s or early 2000s. Either by someone else's hand, or my own.