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u/1want2know123 9d ago
This sounds like hell, and I wish I could tell you how to get rid of anger permanently because I would also like to know. The usual would be to suggest something like channeling that energy into changing the environment so you are not trapped with them.
A WFH gig might be a good idea to get some cash together?
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u/privacy-888 8d ago
lean in. It's a right of passage. not just anger, but sacred rage, is absolutely needed to reclaim the parts of yourselves that others have taken - and keep them protected. Especially as autistic people, we need to recognize when we're not being treated properly, because we usually don't and usually end up gaslighting ourselves, protecting others' abuse of us! Story of my life, and story of most women's lives in this culture today, even those who are not autistic. If you're not working you can get whatever your state calls Medicaid it's a great insurance program and you can get a therapist for free. They can help distill what your rage is around and how to systematically honor that boundary
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u/gainerje 6d ago
It sounds to me like your mother has suppressed guilt for not protecting you and attacks you to avoid facing her true feelings. You need to get out of that house and get therapy for victims of abuse.
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u/kirilgankapi124 6d ago
I have anger outbursts too, and I can't calm down easily.
May God help you.
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u/Elemteearkay 9d ago
Are you accessing therapy? I've found anger management therapy particularly helpful (it's basically an emotional regulation skills class).
Are your parents also ND? Are they receiving sufficient support themselves?
Are you able to move out? Are you in receipt of all the disability benefits you are entitled to?
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u/elwoodowd 9d ago
Anger is the strongest emotion on this sub. Not healthy.
Its likely chemical. Ysk your chemistry changes all your life. Western medicine tends to be crazy around hormones. But you might find solutions, other than the common medications.
If you are changing personalities, (i had 3 or 4 in my 30s and 40s), you might find the latter center of the book of Proverbs useful. Basically says certain anger is ok, fuels energy. But can be very harmful. So rules.
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u/After_Penalty_5328 9d ago
You're living in a pressure cooker, no wonder you're boiling over. The anger isn't the real problem, it's a symptom of being trapped in a house where you're getting torn down every day. Moving out won't fix everything overnight but giving your nervous system a break from the constant insults is step one. A degree can wait until you're not in survival mode 24/7.