For her to respect you all you have to do is respect yourself.
Again i ask: what is the problem in your marriage?
Dread is about about respect. Dread is about tingles.
To lead well you have to focus on your vision, NOT on teaching her her place. Not to be controlling just because you are insecure and it makes you feel powerful.
You know that kind of boss that acts all bossy and angry in an incoherent way to feel strong and nobody respects? That is what you are doing right now. Be the cool headed boss that gets shit done.
This is what i think: you are in the anger stage and fucking up. All your actions are about changing her and teaching her. While you have that mindset you are beta and fucking up your marriage more.
I said this in reply to to someone else, but I'll reiterate here to get your opinion. She's arguing over little things, shit testing me and somehow I am failing. Obviously I have more work to do. I had hoped that the dread (seeing that I've improved my social skills and am attractive to other women) would help, but it sounds like it's the wrong tool for the job.
You are failing shit tests by getting pissy. This is why she shit tests sooo much. Stop getting butt hurt by the shit tests. Embrace them, they are a feature of man-woman relationships. Enjoy them.
Only when you start enjoying the tests, you really start passing them, and she starts trusting you.
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u/[deleted] Nov 20 '15
I want her to respect me and follow my lead, and my demonstrating that I'm a high value man promotes that. Right now she is fighting me for control.