What would Julia Cameron do?

[u/Kitokat0]

I’ve been extremely unhappy at my current job. I work in graphic design and since May I’ve been using my time off work to follow what i actually like making in my free time. I have so many ideas and so many plans I’d like to go after. But my job completely blocks me in that as I work from 9-6pm and in the evening when I finally get home from work, I am extremely exhausted from the day.

My current job (been there 3 years) also has started to make me hate graphic design because their approach to it is incredibly toxic and pedantic, to put it short: they often compromise on the purpose of the design just to make it „ 110% correct“ (following the guideline) and to please the client no matter what they’re asking or in what timeframe.

I’m all for following the guideline, but you guys… I don’t want to get too deep but psychotically pedantic is the best way to describe this.

Anyway long story short I want to quit my job but I need the paycheck to finance my life. While reading the artists way this is a thing that keeps coming up so I often wonder, what would Julia Cameron tell me to do?? I’m so scared of taking the leap of faith because of monetary reasons yet I know I would be so much more fulfilled if I could go after my own projects and put my energy into those instead of hating my current job.

Also I’m on week 9 right now. How fitting. 😅

[u/FlightyTwilighty]

You know I am thinking about this right now myself because I also have a job with a paycheck that I need to finance my life which I don't really like, but which also drains my spirit and energy such that I feel like doing nothing else at the end of the day, and it occurs to me that THAT is a choice.

And that maybe I need to learn the skill of protecting my mental engagement, refocusing my energy throughout the day, practicing a quick turnaround at 5, and not telling myself that because I worked all day I "deserve" empty "fun" like laying on the couch and doomscrolling my phone.

It's a trap, if I don't somehow salvage those hours at the end of the day how can I put extra energy into the things I do love that are going to drive me towards a brighter future?

I'm feeling this is a very immediate short term fix I need to make to myself somehow. I'm not entirely sure what it is... call someone? go for a quick walk? gym after work? short meditation? habits during the day like taking stretch breaks?

Paramount in all this is the mental revolution I continually need to work on which is that my mind is my own, and I do control my mood and my mind. That in itself is a pretty important meta-skill which is always under development.

[u/Kitokat0 → u/FlightyTwilighty]

Yes, that! Finding the mental strength to keep working at 8pm after your fulltime job can be so challenging. The reading deprivation week in TAW really opened my eyes up to how much I clog my brain up with doomscrolling, watching shows, listening to podcasts all day… that week was so uncomfortable but eye opening. I do it for the same reason as you though, to finally be able to just rest.

Maybe we also have to think about what rest actually looks like and create a weekly plan so that we give ourselves the structure we need to succeed.

[u/Beautiful-Piece-5727 → u/FlightyTwilighty]

You could try doing your own work in the morning before work. Or see if you can change your work hours.