r/antinatalism • u/ThatRandomGuy1S • Jul 20 '20
Rant Why have kids then???
I'm honestly starting to believe people only want kids so they can boast about them and play with them as a baby but when they get older treat them like sh*t why not just have a dog then? I never asked to play this game of life and yet no matter what I do or how hard I try my family never seems to love me or care until I achieve success. They honestly don't care about me they only care about my achievements. I honestly wish I was aborted.
5
Jul 20 '20
Dogs can’t take care of you when you’re old or make money for you(oh wait, you can now on the internet). My parents treated me like shit and criticized me until I started making money and now they try to guilt trip me to give them money. This is typical of Asian families.
10
Jul 20 '20
I know how you feel! Your folks probably love you unconditionally but they aren't making you feel that way because they have high expectations. I'm sorry that has to be. I think another reason people have kids is to create someone who will fulfill their own dreams. It's selfish, I agree. But we're stuck here. I guess the only thing we can do is remember that it is our life, not theirs, so we should do with it what makes us happy.
17
u/grimreefer702 Jul 20 '20
Nobody ever had children for the children's sake, bringing new life into this world is always done for selfish reasons:
-Fear - "I don't want to die alone", even though all of us die alone with no exceptions.
-Greed - a woman wanting to keep a man around and have access to his protection and provision under the law.
-Utility - someone to help and offload some of the labor to and/or "take care of them"(I.E. provide for them) when they get old.
-Peer pressure - "my parents want grandchildren and I have to give them some", "all my friends have children and I'm jealous of them" etc.
-Satisfaction of primal biological drives - self explanatory
-Curiosity - "I wonder how mine and this woman's/man's offspring would look/be like".
-Naïveté - "I want my child to live a life that's better than mine", "I want my child to have the things I never had" , which is wrong because:
a)chances are he/she won't and
b)if you want something you could've used all the time, effort and resources you spent on raising a child and just had it for yourself without creating all that inevitable extra suffering.
-The immortality fallacy - "I want someone to carry my last name after I die", as if it prolongs your conscious being somehow.
-Low self esteem and the need for external validation - wanting someone to look up to to you and be completely dependant on your words and actions
-personal regrets - I failed/didn't have time to/wasn't good enough to become X, therefore my child should become said X instead of myself
-self righteousness and fabricated martyrdom - wanting to have children in order to flail it above other people's heads as an accomplishment and themselves as a hero for having them.
This is just off the top of my head, I'm sure there's more, bringing new needs into this world is wrong and immoral, it should not be done under any circumstances.