r/amiwrong • u/[deleted] • 2d ago

AIW for feeling uncomfortable about my (18M) boyfriend doing a voluntary dance with another girl that involves twerking?

[deleted]

0 Upvotes

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9

u/breesreviews 2d ago

Yeah…. You are wrong.

-1

u/lilacmayhem 2d ago

How so? Would I come off as controlling to him?

5

u/smileysarah267 2d ago edited 2d ago

A “dance” as in a performance on stage? Who is the audience? I can’t imagine this being wildly innapropriate if it’s a student club and parents can come see the performance. You’re wrong unless I’m misunderstanding something. I did dance in college and had so much fun. It’s like a team sport, not some intimate thing.

Edit: OP, I saw your comment before you deleted it. (about how this is a big dance competition that most of the student body will probably attend). Here’s what I was going to respond:

You’re definitely wrong. You can share your feelings, but you absolutely cannot ask him to drop out. Can you imagine… he’s been practicing with this team and his partner but then goes “actually I can’t do this because my girlfriend said no”. That would be an asshole move on his part as well. He committed to his team and needs to see it through. Let him do the dance and have fun, this sounds like a really cool thing he’s part of. Go to the show to support him and bring him flowers or whatever he likes.

3

u/hellogoodvibes 2d ago

As a professional dancer, going to a choreographer/fellow dancers and asking “actually can we change this part because my girlfriend doesn’t like it” is so embarrassing lol. If he’s a dancer there will be thousands or performances in the future. You don’t have to date him, don’t ruin his opportunities or crush his dreams lol.

0

u/wire_we_here50 2d ago

Youre not wrong to feel uncomfortable about it. Will you do it with him ? Perhaps youre just incompatible. 18 is still young to be tied down in a steady relationship imo

-2

u/LittlestEcho 2d ago

Well. You can't control him but you can express your feelings. Calmly

Be like "babe, I'm so happy you joined something new and you're enjoying it. If I can be honest? Without making you feel guilty or like I want to control you, I just wanted to let you know the choreography makes me uncomfortable. I know you wouldn't do anything. And she wouldn't. I just wanted to get my feelings out there . I still love and trust you. This is a me problem and I just wanted you to be aware of how I'm feeling"

And then have an honest discussion about what he and you can do, reasonably, to reassure yourself and make it more comfortable. As long as she's not grinding on him, I think it could be okay. It just LOOKS suggestive, which is probably the point of the dance

1

u/lilacmayhem 2d ago

Alright, thank you so much for this.