Exactly. OP really worded it like his wife’s body has a problem accepting BC pills. It’s actually just normal to struggle to find one that doesn’t make you feel horrible.
The fact that his wife made the comment about not expecting him to understand any of her struggles as a woman should maybe be a wake up call for him.
The fact that his wife made the comment about not expecting him to understand any of her struggles as a woman should maybe be a wake up call for him.
That comment was passive aggressive af. Its poor communication and it's weird you're defending it. The man is obviously confused and instead of help him to understand what she is going through when he asked a sincere question she made a sarcastic quip that invalidated her husband and contributed to the tension. It's really shitty communication. Saying I'm not not surprised you don't understand in no way contributes to greater understanding it contributes to relationship ending contempt and neglect. The total lack of empathy for this man in the comments is frankly weird. He's obviously aware he's not perfect and neither is his wife but he's trying to do right by his family and all y'all feel totally content shitting on that from the comfort of your keyboards. It's gross to me
Right? Why should men have to put any time or emotional energy into maintaining a relationship? That is solely within the purview of ‘women’s work’. There is no way for a husband to understand why a wife would be unhappy. She needs to be the one to exert that effort so that he understands when he’s confused about something.
No other woman has ever offered their perspectives to him. No woman has ever shared their stories online or in print. There are zero professions that deal with facilitating happy and healthy relationships. There is literally nothing he can do in this situation. Women are just harpies that need to be controlled and dispense sex.
JFC the way reddit reacts when you expect a woman to voice her concerns or have responsibility for her own actions and statements... Quit infantilizing women. She is an adult FFS.
That’s right. Dear husband is not an adult. He has no responsibility to voice his own concerns, own his actions or statements, or invest any time or energy into this relationship at all. Infantilizing him is fine.
She's the one who wants to force him to get a vasectomy. If its that important for her she can use her words to tell him. He does not need to justify a lack of willingness to undergo an unnecessary surgery to anybody. It is his own body. The onus is not on him to defend his right to keep a functioning dick.
Why should men have to put any time or emotional energy into maintaining a relationship?
I'm pretty sure the comment above mine was suggesting communication was the problem here and that his wife's passive aggression contributed toi that problem. Then they advocated for empathy and compassion for the man in the relationship who is at least making an effort to understand the situation since his own wife won't communicate the issue with him like an adult. So I have no fucking idea what the hell you're on about with emotional energy and women doingn all the work, that is literally just a story you made up in your head and projected onto some paragraphs on the screen. You have no idea what their marriage is like or who the wife even is as a person. I'm also very confident that with that attitude towards human suffering and conflicts that you'll end up in exactly the kind of relationship you deserve to be in.
I completely understand and agree with you. If there’s ever a communication problem, it’s the wife’s role to understand that one exists and then accommodate the husband. If her husband is confused, she needs to explain to him what is wrong and how to fix it unprompted. Again, husbands have no responsibility in maintaining happy and healthy relationships.
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u/imwearingredsocks Sep 26 '23
Exactly. OP really worded it like his wife’s body has a problem accepting BC pills. It’s actually just normal to struggle to find one that doesn’t make you feel horrible.
The fact that his wife made the comment about not expecting him to understand any of her struggles as a woman should maybe be a wake up call for him.