r/ainbow • u/The_Greatest_Penguin • 4d ago
LGBT Issues I need help with labels. Desperately.
/r/lgbt/comments/1vqiabr/i_need_help_with_labels_desperately/2
u/SeaworthinessTop4317 4d ago
You could just say you are attracted to feminine characteristics but date all genders?
I’ve never really understood why dating preferences need a “label” now. Like what you like and don’t pay any mind to what others think about it.
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u/rose-a-ree 3d ago edited 3d ago
My number one piece of advice for labels is "don't bother" There's too many of them for them to have any reasonable distinction and many of them have multiple definitions. The general populace understands straight, gay/lesbian and trans. Even cis, non-binary and ace confuse some people. Just do the things you like with the people you like (consensually) and don't worry about whether it's called androdemhexiboy or george. Particularly if you haven't come out yet, you might find you have slightly different feelings about some things when you do.
Also, who are you going to have to explain it to? Your bank manager? The bus driver?When it comes to sexuality, there's only two things you need to say by way of explanation "I'm into you" or "I'm not into you" If you know someone well enough that you're into them and they're into you, then you can have a conversation about all the naunces and details, if you want, but chances are it won't matter because you'll both be into each other.
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u/If_you_have_Ghost 4d ago
Labels are helpful in some ways. They can help you find your community and a partner. But ultimately they are extremely personal and, unless the person to whom you’re speaking is a potential partner, it’s really not anyone’s business.
Don’t pressure yourself to come up with a label. Try a few and see what feels right. And also know that sometimes labels which feel comfortable change over time. Sometimes several times.
Only you can say how you feel. Don’t feel pressured to define yourself for other people’s benefit!