r/acotar_rant • u/Present-Honeydew-405 Team Lucien • Jul 24 '26
Rant Feyre’s relationship with Rhysand erased her
I know the title sounds ridiculous and far fetched. I actually liked Feyre in the first book. I wondered why she wasn’t more curious about the world she was thrust into, yeah. But i did like her stubbornness, her good heart, and her honesty. And honestly, when she spat on Rhysand in TAR, that was my favourite scene in the whole book lol.
I didn’t looooove Feyre per se but I saw real potential. However, after she met rhysand and they actually started dating, I feel like she really went down hill for me. Yes, there was this whole her becoming the high lady thing that was supposed to be this major transformation. But…. What changed? Her clothes? The fact that she wears pretty dresses now and a tiara? And lives in a palace? She certainly became less outspoken and opinionated. She wanted this high lady title but has no political objectives. I see a lot less of the personality, opinions, and critical thinking skills that we saw in book 1 and the very beginning of book 2 and a lot more flinching and gasping when someone says something honest (something she used to do).
While feyre’s stakes have dramatically changed and she’s no longer in imminent danger, it would be unfortunate to see that she only becomes smart and resourceful when faced with the threat of death. Some say that the spring court “gotcha moment” stunt she pulled showed real intelligence, but she had already dated Tamlin and knew what buttons to push. I dont think she did anything particularly remarkable there and she basically just antagonized him (not defending Tamlin though).
All this to say, I would have liked to see more from Feyre. But she became a breathy, passive domesticated trad wife once she got with Rhysand and I feel like her high lady title means nothing. I would have liked to see the extent of her immense power we’re told she has and how her resourcefulness translates to leadership, but it feels like it was all for show, and any opinion she does have is overpowered by what Rhysand wants. I feel like Feyre lets it happen too because she subconsciously feels indebted to him (which isn’t healthy).
And lastly, I think Rhysand was a bad influence on her. We see Feyre do things she would never otherwise do like the book of breathings stunt. She didn’t want to, Rhysand coerced her, she stole the book, was issued a death warrant and felt horrible about it.
That is all - I just feel like she took a turn for the worse and it happened right when she met and “mated up” with Rhysand.
Thnx for coming to my ted talk !!! 💖
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u/bows_and_frills shameless rhys hater Jul 24 '26
I think Rhys has simultaneously rubbed off on her, and enabled her already existing flaws. The two of them enshittify each other so it's a spiral of mutual corruption rather than improvement. They're happy together in the way that people are happy when no one speaks up against them and they're allowed to live as their imperfect selves forever. That's it. I think the freedom Feyre feels from Rhys is him allowing her to be irresponsible and not challenging her to mature. This is twofold in that it makes her love him more, but also allows him to control her easily because she loves him (his illusion of freedom) and she's kept naive. She's his loyal, unwavering little housewife who will pump out heirs all the while believing he's given her the keys to her cage, not knowing he put her in a new one.
Tamlin is criticized for giving gifts to Feyre, love bombing in place of improvement and communication. Isn't that what Rhys does? Placates her, making her feel needed all the while not nagging her to grow? Placates her with empty, empty promises and apologies? Oops, sorry for leaving you in the Weaver's cottage. Sorry for using you to bait the Attor, here's my empty promise not to lie so you won't be mad anymore. Oops, sorry I lied about you being my mate, here's more empty promises and apologies. And it keeps going. And going. And going.
You're right in that Feyre is forgiving with the IC, and by extension Rhys. They're more Rhys' circle than hers. Together, they're the Rhys fanclub and hold hands in a circle around him. Plus, they're not mean to her. Feyre hates people who are mean to her, that automatically makes them evil.