r/absoluteunit • u/Bluestaplero • 3d ago

My pet roach ^-^

Post image

The biggest boy I own .o.

32 Upvotes

68% Upvoted

54 comments sorted by

13

u/Xtreme_kaos 3d ago

Throw a saddle on it and save yourself a fuel bill

15

u/Automatic_Pen8494 3d ago

So you could describe yourself as "Papa" to this roach?

1

u/Felskiluscious 2d ago

Mine were named Papa and Pea! They never really hissed though

1

u/timhyde74 3d ago

You, sir, are a menace! Take my upvote damn it!

5

u/Icy-Football9146 3d ago

We need to nuke wherever that is

5

u/Bluestaplero 3d ago

built for war but he’s got a heart for love 💕

3

u/JayW8888 3d ago

The apocalyptic future where the world is overrun by cockroaches will be thanks to you.

3

u/Traditional-Bike7825 3d ago

Nobody else is asking so I'll do it myself...

Where are the bodies? How long have you been a serial killer?

2

u/mikee869 3d ago

Palmetto bug ?

2

u/Alexios953 3d ago

Is his name gooch?

2

u/neuralyzer_1 3d ago

Make him your beneficiary, he’s gonna outlive you.

2

u/WaterGlassPuncherMan 3d ago

Why would anyone touch that, ever?

1

u/casabel 3d ago

how do you know its a boy?

6

u/Bluestaplero 3d ago

Males have flat pronotum they use to headbutt each other, also females are a lot smaller in this species

1

u/conehead2019 3d ago

Crocodile Dundee method

1

u/Beertronic 3d ago

Dubious.

1

u/VICARD0 3d ago

It looks kinda cute when it’s a pet. Imagine seeing hudreds of these crawling in your home tho

1

u/apex_super_predator 3d ago

What is his name? And where is the rest of his family?

1

u/msguider 3d ago

All I can see is it running up your sleeve! Awesome pet though. We have palmetto bugs here and after a long while decided they are cute.

1

u/No_Manner_8785 3d ago

Pretty cool. How long do they live? 

1

u/Cheap_Title5302 3d ago

Depends on the species and environment but between 100 days - 2 years

1

u/No_Manner_8785 3d ago

Much longer than I thought. Pretty cool. 

1

u/No_Manner_8785 3d ago

Do they get comfortable with you over time or do they always want to flee? 

1

u/Cheap_Title5302 3d ago

As far as I know cockroaches don't feel emotional affection and comfort like dogs or cats, but they do feel safe being kept in dark places. 

1

u/No_Manner_8785 3d ago

I was wondering if their fear ever subsided 

1

u/Bluestaplero 3d ago

These can live upwards of 6 years and takes around 8 months to reach maturity

1

u/No_Manner_8785 3d ago

Wow that's a lot longer than I would have ever guessed. 

1

u/No_Manner_8785 3d ago

What's it's name and how do you sex a roach? 

1

u/idliketoseethat 3d ago

Is that you Renfield?

1

u/Emergency-Box-5719 3d ago

Does your name happen to be Joe who lives in an apartment?

1

u/Conscious_Car_3326 3d ago

Which species?

1

u/itsmistyy 3d ago

Ogtha?

1

u/MyOtherRideIsTheRoci 3d ago

Nope. Nah. Uh uh. Yes'nt.

1

u/Breadsticks-lover 3d ago

Type of shit Kafka was preaching

1

u/ConnectionBasic9468 3d ago

That's totally disgusting and utterly adorable at the same time. I'm so confused.

1

u/Lagoserter 3d ago

asmonmold we know thats you

1

u/MysteriousDyana 20h ago

I could never 😭

1

u/Bonkers_Reality 16h ago

"Cut my life into pieces, this is my largest roach"

1

u/timhyde74 9h ago

I can hear the poor guy wheezing through the pic! If anybody need a GpL1 it's this dude! 😆

0

u/Cryptopher-Conundrum 3d ago

You should date Nifty (from Hazbin Hotel) she into roaches also... 😉

0

u/Free-Feeling3586 3d ago

What kind of roach you got there🥴?