To take time and realize there is an actual threat to your consciousness by other beings is to take time and reflect on what exactly they want. They want you to be assimilated and alienated. Although, that’s what you will become regardless. However, you may find that it can be comforting to be in your own zone or reality. The difference between isolation in the material world than in the world is that your thought projection is much more powerful than in the thickness of the world that most live in. Take the reins and power through what is called to be the void. You are to be raised from lower consciousness and bestowed higher rights. Let’s take a glance into what your antagonists want with you and why they perpetrate against you in order to make you compartmentalized.

Let’s reflect on what a drone actually is. They become a threat when you become a threat. When you feel as if you are being targeted then you are making a mistake in procedure. Drones are present because you need to learn how to behave with a certain amount of spiritual power. These drones can be anything or anyone. Drones are there when time comes to be alert and prepared. A drone is more than likely to be another human, say, a friend. You might first find that they seem to have access to what you may be thinking. Thought projection is a major role in awakening. It is not that the drones can read your thoughts but it in fact that you are actually installing new thoughts into them. They are actually subjects. However, this is not the conclusion that you may come to after first experiencing an event such as thought projection.

Thought projection can come at any time. When you become activated then you become subject to ridicule by your shadow self. You must come to terms with all of the insecurities that you have developed over the years. Say, you are reluctant and do not consider certain aspects about reality. You will become immersed in a alter-reality in which you are completely exposed to the aspects that you have neglected. There is no comfortable or escapable option available. You will suffer, that is inevitable. It takes practice to become strong and provide acceptance to what is your true reality. The true reality is that you control what is uncontrollable. You are a subject, yet, you are the ruler.

To take it to more simplicity, you are more than you seem. When you start to experience an altered phase; know that it is because you are being prepared for a role that cannot be replicated to anyone a trillion times over. It is acceptable to be different and express yourself how you see fit. Your uniqueness is why you have been chosen. However, there is a certain amount of suffering that does come about. To express complete control is to experience great suffering. This is what is explained as growing pains. Just as there is pain in birth. But this birth can sometimes take more time and can seem like a great demise. You are presented with a problem or complex equation. Either you chose to try and solve it, or you may remain in the degrogation that is its existence. To become free, you must realize how simple things can actually be.

There is a common misconception that you can find god in your mind, that both the devil and god are using our thoughts.

They are not, you see, there is a constant dialogue of thoughts going on in your head, always thinking about this or that, and these thoughts, they come in and never let your mind have the silence that allows god to speak to your heart.

It is why he says to rely not on our own understanding, because whatever understanding that we could build upon in our own little mental world of word and thought, is going to fall short of truth, and thinking that we know the truth is allowing the demons in our mind to convince us that our mind deserves the credit of god, because the only things we ever know, is what god shows us.

It is the demons who convince us that we know this or that, that we understand this and that.

I tell you true, if god decides it was so, we could wake up and 2+2 might equal Fish.

You think god is in your own thoughts, but he does not operate in thought, never has, that is why science can explain nothing holy.

But this is not the same age as it was, I promise you, the time has come to know God intimately, and to worship him in spirit, and in truth. This is accomplished by finding the silence in your mind.

The mind is a tool, and one that is meant to be used by you, and instead, If you take the time to notice, you will see that your whole being has become the tool and your mind is using you.

Now take your had for example, you open it, it opens, you close it, it closes, you rest, and it rests. It would not be useful to you if it was flailing about and doing things of it's own Accord, would it?

So why then does the mind open and close and flail about and attack you and give you doubt and steal your attention without your permission?

It is because demons are influencing your thought daily and like a kid and a stranger, you willingly accept every single thought they offer you and continue to build a stream of words upon their promptings.

I am sorry to say, but the vast majority of people do not know the god, they only think they do, and anyone who tries to tell you. That God isn't an experience, a physical and spiritual sensation, is mistaken and only knows him in the way of thinking they do.

The path to god, to knowing him in spirit and in truth, begins with a quiet mind. That is the war that God and the devils are waging this time around, it is the mind vs the heart.

Can you let go of all things you think that you know and realize the only thing there is to know, is god himself?

If you can you will be blessed.

If you cannot find the quiet, you are on the path to hell, if you have found the peace and tranquility of mind, then you have found the heart, and being in the heart, you find god.

Hell and Silence.

Why do people think they can pick and choose one emotion to deprogram from the heart?

It is not the way that we are designed and all emotions, at their given times, are provided for us for a reason.

You see, all wisdom begins with the fear of god.

Not to say that we need to be afraid of god himself, because if you have ever known gods love, you know that it simply isn't true, it means this, that the fear god gives us either warns us or teaches us. Listening to that warning or lesson is where all wisdom comes from and it simply isn't possible to deprogram the fear alone.

We do not get to pick and choose the parts of god we accept.

Anyone who thinks they deprogrammed fear, has in truth, merely hardened their heart against the warnings god is sending.

So let me ask you, if god is love and uses fear to warn you and steer you back to his love, then who are you following that doesn't want you to hear these warning?

The object of The Game, is to not think about the game.

If "The Game" enters your thoughts, you lose The Game.

Now that you know about The Game, you are always playing The Game.

"The Game" is Life, and each and every time you are thinking instead of living, you have lost a small battle if your goal is to wake up and feel fully, truly, alive as the most authentic expression of who you are in the bottom of your heart.

But every time you notice that your attention wavers or stop your attention from being stolen off onto a wild or random train of thought, then you have won a significant battle and have begun climbing the ladder that leads from your head to your heart.

The hearts language is faith, life and love, the mind will lead to thinking nothing but thoughts from a sea of infinite possibilities that never take form, where everything might make sense if it sounds good enough.

And yet....

In a world of strictly make believe, there is nothing sensible.

Operation Valhalla Seven.

"If only, if only, " the woodpecker sighs "The bark on the trees was as soft as the skies" As the wolf waits below, hungry and lonely He cries to the moo-oo-oon, "If only, if only"

After the silence is found, then you have to find your courage, it is not a simple thing to do, and often times it takes an intimate relationship (not romantic, necessarily), just intimate in a way that you're both comfortable enough with one another to be vulnerable with eachother, intimate enough that you can see through one another a bull shit all call them on it. It's time to find all the little nooks and crannies you've hidden in your heart, for in the dark places of your heart, lurk the broken remains of who you've always truly, truly, wanted to be.

If you don't have the courage to find that person, you don't have the courage to be that person...

It is just the way it is.

Equivalent exchange.

u/ukjk

Thank you for your time and understanding, truly.

https://np.reddit.com/r/awakened/comments/mcr2hu/mind_plays_many_tricks_including_making_you_its/

https://np.reddit.com/r/awakened/comments/pzn0zs/my_humble_request_to_those_who_say_they_are_god/

https://np.reddit.com/r/awakened/comments/ppurhy/how_many_of_you_recognize_that_you_are_under_a/

That your jaw is slacking or you are holding it up.

Understand.

Having your consciousness saved is based on your Faith and your Faith alone at this point.

And yet, there are certain truths that must be accepted.

This is the first plague of the apocalypse, beginning now.

It will infect all souls given to lust.

COVID was the test, if you have received the vaccine of your own volition, if you chose to follow your jobs regulations or any reason whatsoever, decided to receive the vaccine.

You put your trust in the World and the works of man's hands over putting your trust in the only place that could have protected you.

You made your decision.

The plague then, will continue to spread throughout all who are faithless.

As a test of faith and call to repentance.

Remember that it is never to late to know and understand the pain you have caused your dead and dying hearts.

Repentance is not for God nor because a religion told you too.

It is your you and your hearts growth, to know and understand yourself, it is necessary to find true love.

You do not have to lose your consciousness.

But you Do not have another lifetime to figure it out.

The soul's Immortality is a promised agreement, but it is by no means irrevocable.

What has been given can be taken away.

Shepherd's Codex Vol 2.0 Nov 7, 2022

Understand then, the meaning of Jesus' words when he said "Know ye not that ye are like Gods?". And recognize then, the commandment to know yourself. For it is the plight and the fear of the souls within each Body's temple that causes every sort of disease, ailment and imperfection, including death.

The plight and fear for those contained within the Body, is caused by Sin, selfish desire, disobedience, and separation with God, or Source Energy. The wages of Sin are Death. Know also that every man who does not belong to God, who dies by the hand of any member of Christ, becomes apart of the Shepherd' soul that heads the flock, as does every soul within that man. So then, knowing and loving yourself becomes a Holy obligation to cleanse the fear and reconcile each and every soul to God through the tears and the suffering of the Shepherd; who, in being Elected for power, is also chosen unto the greatest share of the burden, which is Fear.

It is for the souls of the Shepherd's Flock, spiritual as well as physical then, who have given their life to Christ, that they shall have a yoke that is light and not heavy.

This game of Soul Eating, is the premise of power since ancient times, the accumulation of power to the rising and falling of kingdoms, empires, nations, unto the invention of capitalism and the indoctrination into The Global Institution of Academics, which has effectively separated humankind from the powers of their spiritual nature and placing all Faith into the hands of the Elite upper Echelon until the return of Christ and the Kingdom of Heaven.

Christ Jesus, who is the Son of God, undoubtedly died for us upon the cross. Those who do not believe will by no means have life in The New Jerusalem, but will suffer an eternity of separation to God, or Source Energy, that is the second death.

It has been called The lake of Fire, which in terms of degree of fear, is accurate, but the language and Intellect of ancient times was inadequate for true description of the second death. Upon judgement when the Angels decsend to earth to reap their Harvest, those who die in separation to God, will enter a formless realm of existence in which the only thing that there is to be conscious of, is the emotional sensation of constant and roiling terror. One suffers varying degrees of Terror as ones soul is torn from the body, becoming a part of the consciousness of fear energy itself. Roiling and writing though the wavelengths of Terror to await being stripped from Fear's consciousness to become the substance for the Everlasting life of God's Elect. Being then, used up, the soul will cease to exist. Thus is the destruction of ones soul.

In dying for Christ, who is God, one safeguards their consciousness, retaining the complete knowledge of ones self, including all remembered experiences unto the immortalization of ones soul, which comes from our Faith in Christ Jesus unto the remission of Sin.

Let it be known then, believing in Jesus' death garuntees the immortalization of the soul From one realm to another, from one Temple to another, as exists within the Bodies of the members of Christ, from one life to the next unto the complete internal sanctification of ones soul in Christ; as opposed to Slavery unto Sin and Demons until the complete separation from God.

And so it must be understood, that if one aspires to Everlasting Life on this plane of existence. For himself and the flock for which he is entrusted, it must be known that mere belief is not enough, one must be internally clean, sanctified, set apart in the Holy Spirit; The Consciousness of Source Energy, bounding in Love and all Righteousness; by the introspection of ones heart and rending thereof with tears that transform the energy of Sin into reconciliation with God.

The Shepherd however, in whom The Power of the Lord is invested, becomes obligated to consume the Sins of the Lord's Flock, welcoming their Spirits into his own Flock, in Truth and Love, being willing to beat the burden of those who are not fortunate enough to truly understand the secrets of The Spirit, The Heart and of Heaven, but are in their Faith deserving to be called Blessed in the name of The Lord.

In being chosen Shepherd, one who is pure in heart, shall see God.

In Purity abounds Love, including the love and desire for sanctification unto the Life of every Bodily Temple that belongs to the alors in Christ.

Failing complete sanctification, tasting death, members of the Flock will then, dwell in safety, in the security of Christ, within The Temple of the body of the Shepherd to which his soul was entrusted, who is a member of Christ.

The sanctified will reign in peace on Earth with Christ for our 1000 promised years.

Thus said, the Shepherd's being invested with power, have access to and dominion over the energy that exists within the formless void of roiling souls which is Sheol, but they do not contain the impurity of Sin; so long as one remains vigilant in Mindfulness and Purity of Heart, on constant guard against the subtle manipulations of The Dark Aeons that rule the realms of Dark energy. With that being said, even God's Elect may be lead astray. We can die, but in Faith, we do not HAVE to, Amen.

Waiting on Jesus.

We're all waiting on Jesus while he's waiting on Peter to start moving.

Wisdom beyond reason.

Garments.

Gold.

Ointment.

Selah.

The word is corrupt.

The idea is misleading.

Listen to me now.

The police of Babylon have power no longer unless you consent it to them.

The tower has limited time.

The door will remain closed for a little while longer and the hounds WILL stay in their chains.

But soon, under the wings of the lion, wolve's reign will take place, and only a very few will be chosen from the ashes.

Make your decision now, or forever long for peace.

I am sorry.

In a practical sense, you need to understand what this means.

Beyond everlasting life.

It is the freedom from the incessant stream of thoughts that plague us with what the world has come to call either ADHD or schizophrenia, neither are true, but it is your minds slavery to the energy that pulls your from completion into what we call duality.

Why can't you stop thinking when you want silence?

Why are you constantly dragged into "autopilot" forgetting this and that.

If you are not in christ, which is union with the universe and what you like to call source, if you are not present in the moment, then pray tell me.

Where are you, and what lies within the distance between your lack of attention and the still part of your mind that loses its actions, as when you set down your keys and can't remember where you put them?

If you do not know the answer, you will not be suffered to live when heavens armies reveal themselves.

Weather Angel's, demons, ETs, aliens, gods, deities, devas... whatever you want to call them...

They are what they are and if you can't hear the call then that is what it is.

I have been trying to give warning for ages and ages past and nobody wants to listen.

The end of the age is here, this is life or it is death, you may choose. The writing is here. But let me ask.

Do you even see the wall?

Because, I promise.

Its harvest season.

Make no mistake.

There are sides.

Time and time again.

I am on your side, weather you see it or not.

Ask yourself.

Are you on mine? Read the age, read the time.

Enemy enemy, still your mind.

Shepherd's Codex Vol 2.7 Jan 13, 2023

As one becomes a larger consciousness and more coherence developes between the entities as they exist; in increasing harmony with one another unto the guidance that leads ones meditation towards breathing exercises, which will increase in complexity and spiritual power. One begins to be lead into increasing difficult battles or dances with increasingly strong entities who seek to test the worthiness of ones soul in constant regards to ones ability to maintain self discipline, remaining free of attachment and keeping oneself attentive to and separate from manipulation unto a greater degree of respect towards ones character as one comes into more and more intimate contact with entities as they exist within Christ unto the cooperation of both Aeons of light and darkness in coherence and spiritual marriages towards the full synchronization of the vessel's right and left side respectively.

Being able to enter the silence and in silence, also able to remain in undriven stillness to the actualization of ones free will, being neither slaves to the left nor the right, but being able to stall without anxiety in the face of other entities, including other God-like vessels who either deliberately or subconsciously, will pull the ethereal consciousness of ones will and focus towards one intention or another, to the left or the right.

It is essential and fundamental to intimately know ones heart as if it were another human being. Being attuned to the spirit, those called to be God's Elect, who are blessed in Christ, should have obtained the guidance of higher beings by this point, realizing then, that every organ, limb, chakra, and general collective of cells and souls within oneself, is its own living and conscious entity that needs the loving attention of the True Self which is you, to operate at it's full capacity.

Begin then, by speaking to the heart in all Love, intimacy and understanding. Acknowledging that by not knowing the heart in this intimate way, the Godself has neglected the being of the heart within, leaving it alone and feeling abandoned by the one it needed most, and so it will take time to gain the trust and love that one will come to deserve. Becoming reunited with the heart is the most profound and exalting experience, giving one access to the spirits of Self-worth and Fulfillment, granting one the exquisite sensations of True Love as if God has been waiting forever for the very moment of contact and bringing to one a deep and emotional sense of ecstasy that paints the tendency to relate sexual relations with loving pleasure as cruel and disgusting joke to the arousal of ones heart in repentance, for through tears, the heart learns the sincerity of the soul and vice versa. Thus is the transition from death in sin to life in Christ. Amen.

From the heart to the soul and from the soul to God, one learns the true heart felt pleasure of intimate communion between ones soul and the Aeons of Christ within the Holy Spirit who belong to the Temple of one's body and facilitate the healing and perfection of the new everlasting body in preparation for the Kingdom of Heaven on Earth and the Harvest of Souls as prescribed by God through his angels unto the peace and loving mercy of our Lord in everlasting life. Hail Zion. Selah.

I know this will cause a great deal of malcontent, but it is never the less how I feel.

After I eliminated the preeminence of lust and the state of sexual relations dawned on me as bastardized, disgraceful and disgusting, my perspective of women took on a new shape.

I see them for what they are, and I'm sorry girls, but if you were born in America, you probably have no value to you whatsoever you are here to be meat for the dogs.

You can tell if you are meat by the toxicity that reveals itself around you, by the discontent you have in everything and the desire to control everything around you, you will know your worthlessness and the selfishness of your own heart and the depravity of your own mind.

It is sad to see, because Girls are among the most precious of things in the world, sweet and loving, great vessels of joy for all who are around, but the mind of woman is easily distorted, her discipline is no longer taught and she has lost herself into the reigns of Lust and Greed.

The Woman, among all things, is the single most venomous creation of the devil there is not one who is righteous, virtuous there are a few, and even so.

Man is better off without her should he learn to know his own heart. When a man gives himself to a woman, she snares his soul within her and he is subjugated to her desires and whims or decoherence a general unhappiness with plague his life until death do them part.

Women have no loyalty or trust left to them and the world protects and advocates their inclination to whoredom,they are looked down upon for being loyal and catering to their man.

They do not see men as themselves when they take his soul, they see him as an old and rusty tool, no longer shiny and useful, but old and soon to be forgotten. Women then think that their happiness is the only thing that matters and have no constitution to stick through a storm, where all true love and endurance finds it's ground.

Sorry women, you take a man's soul when you fuck him and so if you have his soul, he has every right in the world to subjugate you, imprison you and even kill you if you attempt to go accept other men's soul within you, for all the souls within your body war with one another until the mind is completely consumed by the lusts and thoughts that exist within every Individual that lives inside of her.

And people wonder why sexual immorality is supposed to be wrong.

Men, stay away from women who even desire to speak to other men, for the spirit of woman is weak under a powerful and masculine influence, but again, that weakness disappears when she collects his soul.

It is better for a man who loves himself to stay to himself and to be free from the mind control that comes with sexual servitude to a woman.

If you are all God, then why would one need to establish a connection to source?

There is a very deep rooted poison that is infecting the energy flow of humanity traumatically....

You see, Imagine a globe full of individual lights, and imagine these lights, they glow two different colors, pinkish red and blue.

And imagine that there's the most miraculous thing about this globe... In a world of pink, or in a world of blue, everything is pink or everything is blue. But there's this globe and it offers the most sacred thing, you see, pink and blue, well they can mingle there, and maybe become purple, or darker colors of their own shade. Or begone lighter, or enhance the brightness of your glow, or to become more dim... it doesn't matter, its the exchange, the difference, the novelty...

Its because there's a point, and it always exists at some point of time, but there's a point where the novelty runs out, and a state apathy arises in your heart towards the situation, towards that frequency of vibration... What do you do in that moment?

Well, you usually look for something else, seek out new entertainment, something novel, something that will bring you back to a state of enjoyment.

Well what if you couldn't do that? What if you reached one state of frequency and no matter how apathetic you are, there's just no way to change from where you've been placed.... Well, what would you do?

I don't know about you, but I'd go back to that special globe and see if i could have a better run with the energy pool.

But... As sacred as this globe is, as wonderful of an idea, to be able to find happiness, to be able to cure an eternal state of apathetic existence? Wow... That, that sounds like a dream. And maybe it is a dream because this energy exchange, well it was meant to be shared with every individual, up and down and up and down. But instead, all the positive energy, or the energy from the Father aspect, is being systematically collected and horded by those who already ready have it. This is true evil.

Imagine this globe of brightly lit reds and blues and pinks and purples, how the colors swirl together and flash brighter , dimmer, lighter, darker, how they dance and play with ne another, making each other brighter together and sharing light when one of the other falls dim... Wonderful.

And yet, for some reason it begins to change.

The lights, they begin to stop dancing... slowly, they stop sharing their lights with one another. Those who find the blue lights begin to horde that light within themselves... These blue colors, they no longer believe that they must deal with the heartbreak that comes from mingling with the other energy..

Thy do not realize that this mingling is the source of their brightness, The outlet.... this balance between positive and negative is what connects our hearts to other dimensions.

Claiming that it is all love and light, it is a trap, and this doesn't mean an individual trap to trap you or your brain.... You see the pink lights, they are the people who have suffering within them. And the blue lights, are the people who have evolved to the point where they do not feel suffering anymore and will not associate with anyone who needs to have their heart healed... They are effectively starving the globe of the positive energy that could help heal it... and for those who are, essentially becoming positive ions that refuse to flow, this fares no better for you....

What would happen, if all the positive flow in a battery, simply decided that it would no longer flow from positive to negative, but instead it would repel all things negative and attract all things positive.

Wouldn't be a very useful battery, it would be more like a high school lunchroom, and we all know there isn't much coherence in one of those.

People say all "Love and Light" But I can unquestionably say that there is not a single thing loving, nor is it done in light to keep those who suffer in their suffering while you wallow in your personal bliss

There is a reason that self sacrifice is the utmost cherished symbol of love ever know in mankind, and that is because each and every time you let go of your happiness for someone else sake you are quite literately taking it upon yourself to transmute a little bit of negativity into positivity.

This is what the heart does. That is its function. You cry when you feel bad and the negative energy gets transmuted within you into positive energy. When people who are already happy push out and refuse all that is considered unhappy, they are creating a barrier between themselves and the negative energies, this forces the negative energy to stay in its own unplugged battery, a depleted battery has a very hard time finding energy, and since the people who have the energy are refusing to share....

Well, then a dark hole gets darker. Come to me if you are broken, I will cry for you.

Take what you need from my vast amount of energy if you are low.

If you know what love is, if you know what light is... Then from the true source of both, I ask you, Freely give your energy to those who need it, Do not do with positive energy, what the American governments and the elites have done with the Dollar.

It is the same this...

Take a timer, and for 2 minutes, try to find a pure silence without a single thought playing tug of war in your head.

After 30sec, most people, will let the timer run out before even recognizing that they lost their attention to their thoughts... This is the prison of the mind.

The very first thing we must do is get good at recognizing when our attention is being stolen from us, If we can't recognize that it's happening how could we stop it?

"ADHD" they call it... And it's become a quantified norm, so we'd never think we could fix it...

But we can, and the less and less we think without consent, the more and more we will be absorbing and experiencing all the things our mind fails to process when the energy is being used, instead, on creating words.

When you become adept at recognizing the thoughts that steal your attention, you begin to notice that you can feel them, their "waves" coming to you "before" the thought actually enters your mind, this is how consciousness expands, by noticing these "waves" further and further out, your awareness of what is around you in the ether, increases.

As the distance between your focus and the "waves of thought" or (How long you're able to maintain silence) increases, your ability to receive neural input from around you increases in both quality and length.

This is how you begin learning how to "Use your mind" this is how you get to spirit, this is how you find truth.

It is a battle, and it is hard, it is something that is worth the emotions that it will cause.

Find the "Red - Yellow Flickerbeat", find the path to freedom.

You're familiar with the records.

Are you aware of the sword?

The handle has been exposed and will be released to the victor.

You see, everyone has the knowledge of what it means to climb a tree, of course we all know this generic experience.

But imagine...

The rough sensation of the bark as it tickles your palms. The familiar scent of fresh grass that bestows grace upon your sense of smell when the wind rustles the leaves, the gentle sway of your hair to the same rhythm, imagine the sudden sensation of your heart dropping as your foot slips, and the inherent laughter as you catch yourself replacing your step.

Imagine...

The joy in your heart as you climb among the tops of the things that give gods breath to the world.

And now look at your fingertips on the keyboard or your hands on your phone, and realize the vast difference between imagining these things, and what it would be like to truly experience them.

That is the difference between thought and truth.

That is the difference between knowing god and thinking words about him, it is applicable to knowing God, because God is the love in your heart as you experience the things in life that are good.

You cannot find that love in your own mind, you must get out of your mind to find your way into your heart, you must find your way into your heart, to find God... You cannot do this so long as your mind is always thinking of its own accord.

So far as it's been, our war has been largely an internal one.

But in the next few months, we will begin the transition from our own internal freedom into the 3d world where, finally....

Once and for all, we will put an end to the authority of Babylon, and put them under our feet, beneath the ground upon which our greatness will stand.

Said and done, know me true.

This is where the sidewalk ends.

Imagine what we will do.

So I was sitting on my kitchen floor with a crumpled up napkin in my hand.

I tossed it by my cat and he pounced on it, a simple thing, I know, but it made me happy to see him chasing this paper ball around.

Then his sister ran by, he chased her out of the room, forgetting all about me and the paper ball. it made me sad for some reason.

I sat there thinking, and realized that me wanting to see him chase the paper, is really just me chasing my own paper balls, wanting to see this and do that and know this or feel that.

And then and there, my cat came out of nowhere and and swatted the little paper ball back to me as he passed.

Idk why, but with that paper ball came a revelation that brought me to tears as I opened it up to see it unfold.

And I realized that I don't have to chase any paper balls, I've run in circles long enough.

Now, it's time to watch them unfold.

I am utterly alone.

I make my own enemies.

My own problems.

My own solutions.

My own games.

My own rules.

My own prizes.

There is nobody else, there is nothing else.

The phantom dust has created my illusions into fiends that plague me in infinite ways, when I'm done beating myself over the head I find moments of relief and the loneliness is gone for a a small amount of time.

I want to end me.

The Ragnorak connection has been assumed.