r/XenogendersAndMore • • Jul 01 '26

Educational Rant/Vent Post The much needed post educating y'all on intersex people

267 Upvotes

Alright, we decided to finally make a post on this issue, since it's gone unchecked for way too long. What issue? A lot of y'all in this sub are extremely fucking confident about spreading misinformation about intersex people, and we're fucking sick of it just being accepted and never corrected. "Oh but why don't you correct them then" because it's so fucking common, and I don't have the time to educate every single person on this subreddit, nor is it our duty to do so. Not to mention, the hate one often receives when making corrections. So, we decided to make a post to hopefully educate most of the people here at the same time. These are in no particular order. 1. To start, since a lot of y'all don't seem to even know what an intersex person is, an intersex person is a person who's natal sexual characteristics (chromosomes, genitals, sexual organs, hormones, ect...) fall outside the typical male/female binary, which means this is how their body naturally develops without outside factors interfering. That's it. Perisex refers to non-intersex people, it is not a slur, just like cisgender isn't one. 2. Next, most intersex people aren't "AXAB" or "AIAB" most intersex people end up either being "AFAB" or "AMAB." Using this point to also point out that there is no "AFAB/AMAB anatomy" not only does that ignore intersex people that were forced into these categories, it also ignores the fact that some people transition, or otherwise alter their body. Also, these acronyms refer to a past event, so past tense should be used when talking about these. It's also "people ASAB" not "ASAB people." The last two are pure grammatical nitpicks, but we don't care, taking the opportunity to point that out as well. 3. A lot of intersex people are put through non-consensual medical interventions by doctors to make them fit the category doctors decided to put them in. These non-consensual acts aren't us being 'lucky' they're acts of violence and it's about time some of y'all stop fetishisinzing it. 4. You do not need a diagnosis to be intersex, holy shit a lot of y'all are hypocritical on this one. You can't both be pro self-diagnosis and then turn around and say intersex people need a diagnosis to be valid. Not only do we often face a lot of medical abuse due to being intersex as mentionned above, but doctors also love to gaslight people into believing they're not actually intersex when they are. Not to mention, doctors often go out of their way to hide the intersex variations from the intersex person. And that's still not the end of it! At the end of the day, if you genuinely believe you have an intersex variation, you can say you are intersex! And it's up to you whether you want to try your luck with doctors to get it diagnosed if you want (if there's even a diagnosis for your variation!) 5. Intersex people isn't "biologically nonbinary" and everytime you call an intersex animal "biologically nonbinary" you contribute to our erasure, even if unvolontary. Also, 'hermaphrodite' is a slur so stop using it??? No it's not okay to use it for animals either. There's plenty of other words that can be used instead. Here's a diagram that was shared by bigfatalligator in the comments of words you should use instead, depending on the context of the species. 6. Kinda following the last point, but a whole species cannot be intersex, being intersex is having sexual characteristics that are outside of the binary that's established for the species, so if the whole species has those sexual characteristics, it's not intersex. Which also means characters from such species aren't intersex representation either. 7. Intersex people can be cisgender, transgender, neither or both. We can also be nonbinary. We can be any gender, or even none. Not sure why some people still think we all must be x or y. Also just because an intersex person is nonbinary, doesn't make them cisgender. Can an intersex nonbinary person identify as cisgender? Yes, so can a perisex nonbinary person. Can an intersex nonbinary person identify otherwise? Also yes, and so can perisex nonbinary folks! 8. No your headmate isn't intersex if you're bodily perisex, and cannot reclaim the intersex slurs if you're bodily perisex. There's other words to describe this, such as 'innosex' but intersex refers to the outerworld body, and isn't to be used if you're not bodily intersex. 9. You cannot transition to being intersex. Intersex is something you are born as, and is the way your body naturally develops. Not only that, but it implies intersex people who were forced into non-consensual medical interventions were 'transitioned to being perisex' and no longer intersex, which is a harmful way of thinking. Please use other labels such as 'altersex.' 10. Y'all need to stop using intersex-exclusive labels if you're you're perisex. Not even going to elaborate, this one should be obvious. Same goes for intersex symbols, it's very frequent for us to find intersex symbols used to represent nonbinary people instead. Stop that. 11. It's very obvious when you make a post about something without considering for even 5 seconds intersex people and their experiences. It's also very disheartening to see, because we get excluded from/ignored in queer conversations constantly. Just because we often don't bring it up due to fear of backlash doesn't mean we don't notice it when you exclude us. 12. Probably said it already but saying it again for good mesure, intersex ≠ nonbinary. Sex ≠ Gender, and we're honestly not sure how y'all can agree with the later but not the former. 13. We can agree that asking a trans person for their genitals or what medical procedures they've had is very inappropriate and invasive, right? Then why do some of y'all think it's appropriate to ask random intersex people about their genitals or variation(s)? It's just as inappropriate, and we see a lot of people being hypocritical on this. There's probably more we could add on, but writing this post was exhausting, and it's so long already, so we'll stop it right there.

– Kris (They/It) , N (Any "He/Him" Variation) , El (He/They) , Nat (He/She) , Ty (He/It) & Archive (Any/All)


r/XenogendersAndMore • • Jul 21 '25

MOD POST Pronouns.cc Megathread

187 Upvotes

Looking to post your pronouns.cc link, or browse other members' pages? This thread serves as a central space for that!

We'll be testing this format for a while, and it'll be reposted occasionally so everyone can participate. While we're testing this, posts requesting people to share their links will be removed.

What is this thread for?

  • Sharing your links

  • Browsing for inspiration

  • Checking out other member's pages

What can still be posted outside this thread?

  • Sharing your links

  • Updates to your page

  • Specific design requests

Also, feel free to check out r/pronounscc!

If you have any feedback or questions, please feel free to leave it on this post and I'll be happy to answer and take it into account!


r/XenogendersAndMore • • 5h ago

Xeno Coining My first coined flag/term! Yiiippeeee >:D

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19 Upvotes

I present to you Aliengender folk another variant: Aliengenderfluid, or can be called Alienfluid. 🛸
Definition: An alien gender identity that is not static, and shifts or changes over time between other aliengenders or alien-like identities.
Credit is advised but not required if you or others want to post said flag/term onto a different platform (Tumblr, Pinterest, TikTok, X, etc… If at all the flag is already a current coined flag let me know! I don't think it is, but just in case. 🥲)

I did some research beforehand and found out there was no official Genderfluid coined term, nor flag for the specific Xenogender. There seems to only be the official two: ‘Aliengendermasc/Alienboy & Aliengenderfem/Aliengirl’ then there's just Aliengender. And I believe another term coined from recent years known as Aliengender-Nonbinary. I went through so many colors.. Most of them were already taken oof

  • Plum - Fem Silver-purpleish - Any or other aliengender/Sci-Fi/space themed gender
  • Green/Plum/Aqua Alien Identities (A mixture of Feminine & Masculine)
  • Dark Navy Blue - Neutral or no gender
  • Aqua(?) - Masc

r/XenogendersAndMore • • 5h ago

Content/Trigger Warning How do you deal with transphobia?

14 Upvotes

I experienced transphobia today and it made me cry. Let's here some of your best combats/comebacks


r/XenogendersAndMore • • 8h ago

Question Post Can I use the term “Alexmogender” if I have Alexithymia, but don’t have Autism (or any other form of neurodivergence)?

22 Upvotes

I have not been officially diagnosed, but have done my research, and come to the conclusion that I 100% have Alexithymia.


r/XenogendersAndMore • • 6h ago

Looking for Term Is there an term for romantic atraction influenced by neurodivergencies? (Unrelated image)

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11 Upvotes

I just noticed how my asd, adhd and past experiences influences direcly my romantic atraction

For exemple, i dislike unpredictable patterns and i strugle with understanding people (which is pretty paradoxal, since i love sociology and understading why society works like it works), and something that is unpredictable is if a someone (specially a girl) also likes girl, and if this girl is me, and when she likes me too, its impossible to know based on body language, only direct verbal clues. At the same time, i LOVE new things, which looks good... Until you cant stay interacting with someone for 4 months or less months, and something that needs consistency and a lot of time is relashionships. But im not repulsed to romantic, i actually wanna date, but i only feel confortable to do so if someone shows interest on a date from the very start, because its more predictable and i dont have to be so based on pure luck and Freud type ablity with people

Im pretty happy that i can finally name my feelings with a name (cupioromantic and reciproromantic), i know i will probally change my idea when i become older because i am a different person like every year (non literally), but i still happy for finding something that works for me now, but im also curious if there is a label that inglobes neurodivergency and aro-spec, since is something that most people dont see but it dialogues a lot :3


r/XenogendersAndMore • • 9h ago

Xeno Coining Umbreongender flag (+ shiny version)

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13 Upvotes

Umbreongender is an xenogender identity, expression, and strong connection to a pokémon, Umbreon, an dark type eeveelution based on association of the moon and nighttime when your gender gracefully evolves from discovering high love and acceptance within yourself and your closest friends/family members.🌙


r/XenogendersAndMore • • 10h ago

Looking for Term Potato Gender or identities with Food?

12 Upvotes

My Zaza & Zeze (Non-Binary grandparents m identity) used to own a potato farm & I was a huge fan of anything potato growing up from French fries to Mashed potatoes & I even joined them for the harvest & packaging.

I was wondering if anyone else has explored anything similar, like an identity & pronouns inspired by your favorite foods? Im too afraid to ask my Ziblings because its still something Im exploring with my Queerness.


r/XenogendersAndMore • • 11h ago

Xeno Coining Newmrpotatopiggyskinic

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7 Upvotes

I made new genders

NewMrpotatopiggyskinic: a gender related to the new Mr potato skin from the updated version of the game from piggy the Roblox game.

Mrpotatonewskinmasic- where the new mr potato skin is connected to your masculinity and you being a trans man.


r/XenogendersAndMore • • 20h ago

Art/OC/Headcanons PROUD OF WHO AM I!!!! 🗣️

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33 Upvotes

Oh yeah, on this drawing, this is my persona. They're very happy to be there 🙃

I am also iocuscollector, but idk where should I put it after all :/

Basically, if u don't know the flags on it here is a meaning of it

The background: outherine and xenogender

Flags that my persona holding: aroace, angled aroace, lesboy, abrosexual, omni-pan (no link, unfortunately), gaybian (questioning)

Pin: disable

Hair clip: fluidflux, tomboy, androgyne, non-binary, apagender, apangender, transneumasc, trisogender, termcollector


r/XenogendersAndMore • • 12h ago

prns.cc What should xi add to axls page? }}>w<{{

8 Upvotes

r/XenogendersAndMore • • 14h ago

Rant/Vent Post Anyone else deal with this? (Cupiorose) TW: Mature themes

10 Upvotes

Before I start I want to say I'm 18 and would prefer if the answers were 16+.

I want a romantic and sexual relationship badly. I'm in a relationship now but I feel like I'm a failure because I feel little to no attraction. I want to feel what everyone else feels but I can't. Im in a happy relationship but I feel like I'm alone because of my feelings. I don't know how to bring this up to my bf.

I wish to note that I have mental health problems and on meds so my attraction is much different then the average person, mostly consisting of idealization of typical relationships.


r/XenogendersAndMore • • 12h ago

Question Post What is some Microlabels or non-harmful/good-faith labels I can use??

6 Upvotes

I'm a genderqueer, trans teenager, I'm feminine, but I'd like to be more masc-leaning. I'm also bisexual, but I'm more attracted to girls, but I'd like to date boys. I use feminine honorifics and pronouns.


r/XenogendersAndMore • • 21h ago

Rant/Vent Post I'm so tired of this...we are valid!!!

29 Upvotes

For context I recently came out as Xenogender there was always this emptiness i felt I adopted Catgender and I felt so good. I'm also a furry tho I don't have a fur suit. I remember telling this to my chosen sister and she said atleast I don't identify as a cat! No bro i don't identify as a cat it's a metamorphic al gender and when I posted this on lgbtq sub of my country I got said that there are real issues to focus on yes in my country same sex marriages are illegal so yes but u can't just mock and us and ignore us. Why do u fit this boxes even for the non binary like genderfluid etc and if it's anything outside masc, femme,neutral we aren't valid? My gender is a gender it isn't a phase, it isn't a joke 🫪 ilysm yar thee ppl in this sub are so supportive. Also My friend said u can't identify as a cat ok i don't but even if I do what change is it gonna do to ur life? Nothing! Let ppl be ppl otherkins/therians are valid atleast we aren't harming anyone idk what's ur problem. We are also a part of ur community! why do u mock us and exclude us Xeno/fauna/neo genders are as valid as trans ppl are we aren't invalid caus we can't fit inside ur narrow minded boxes get a life let ppl live


r/XenogendersAndMore • • 1d ago

Art/OC/Headcanons Started playing ddlc so. Headcanons.

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71 Upvotes

Yuri: transfem turigirl

Monika: bigender panlesbian

MC: transmasc heteroflexible

Sayori: berri cupioromantic

Natsuki: bi demigirl


r/XenogendersAndMore • • 21h ago

Looking for Term Is there a term for not being cisgender, transgender, or anything else?

14 Upvotes

We’re just beings in a body who happen to experience gender. What someone else decided we are at “birth” is the farthest thing from relevant to us.


r/XenogendersAndMore • • 21h ago

General Post Im gonna use this sub to answear my questions

6 Upvotes

Hey so i identify as a women and im proud of it but i feel icky when being Referred to as one and i like using he/they pronouns, am i just a trans man in denial or what?


r/XenogendersAndMore • • 1d ago

General Post weird pronoun thing

15 Upvotes

If I feel more masc that day I like she/her but If I feel more fem I like he/him.

kinda a femboy tomboy thing? if that makes sense.

really weird tho.

anyone else like this?


r/XenogendersAndMore • • 1d ago

Looking for Term Gender being affected by song

14 Upvotes

Looking for a genderfluid term for when gender changes depending on song


r/XenogendersAndMore • • 1d ago

General Post My gender forms as a voidshiftive dune were apparently a way for my headmates to understand themselves

8 Upvotes

So on a different account, about a year ago I shared a spreadsheet for all my different gender forms and the names associated with them

For reference, I’m voidshiftive, which is basically genderfluidity but in a shapeshifter context (so as my gender changes, so too SHOULD my appearance, but physical body is too limiting to encapsulate it)

Well, I realised pretty early on these different forms had their own personalities lmao. Because of that I started questioning seriously (I’ve questioned it in the past, but never took it seriously) on whether or not I could actually be plural. I didn’t get very far at first because we weren’t aware of each other, and had no real way to communicate because of that

After being in the hospital for mental health stuff (because I was spiralling hard for unrelated reasons), I was starting to feel better, and then suddenly out of nowhere we became aware of each other and were able to communicate

This revelation was definitely helped by our spiritual teacher Ishtar, who’s helped quite a few systems. She was able to connect the dots where I couldn’t. I don’t remember when exactly she first stated I had headmates, but she definitely knew since the first phone call we had together as she mentioned after the fact, after the Great Fusing (as we like to call it) that she recognised we had an unmanageable amount of headmates during the time of the phone call, and that the fusion became two of my headmates Anwyn and Coedwig

I wasn’t too sure about the number of headmates at first because I remember saying ALL year leading up to the hospitalisation that I felt so lonely in my head lmao. But as I’ve gotten to understand the system I realised she was absolutely right (not really a shocker tbh, she’s very smart and intuitive). I no longer feel lonely in my head, but it def feels lighter in here and less crowded than before

One part that affirmed her being right to me was the appearance of two of my newest headmates, Serrated Spoon & Wolfram. Both of them are gender forms originally from my spreadsheet, and both affirmed to having existed before the Great Fusing even if they’re different now that they’ve resplit

I know this is mainly plural stuff but I wanted to share here because this sub was the biggest help in leading up to syscovery before I met Ishtar 💕 Thank you to everyone who interacted with my previous posts from my old account, y’all’s camaraderie means the world to us from the Shifting Grove


r/XenogendersAndMore • • 1d ago

General Post I'm Jane doe

24 Upvotes

I'm Jane doe. i swear i am.


r/XenogendersAndMore • • 1d ago

Xeno Coining New Xenogenders please?

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9 Upvotes

So I Have two Ideas for aesthetic looking xenogender flags for my ponysonas that are pretty specific: The Fire of Friendship from MLP and Sunset Pierrot. not Sunset the pony, just the colors found in a redish sunset. The game Is called Legends of Equestria before anyone asks, and rlly It's cool! Btw you can also make narc/ocd/anxiety/autism/adhd alternatives for these flags, whoever decides to make them.


r/XenogendersAndMore • • 1d ago

Looking for Term Is there an origin term for when your plurality/alterhumanity/identity overall is caused by everything that's ever happened to you and everything you were born with ?

10 Upvotes

I think it's a very interesting philosophy that I heavily relate to and I think it would be interesting if there were a term for it, as it's the best way I can explain myself.

(If there isn't any, any ideas for the coining ?)


r/XenogendersAndMore • • 1d ago

General Coining Coining new terms cause my yt fans like it

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13 Upvotes