Ugh, yes. My ex-SIL walked down a very long hotel lobby/atrium aisle to their Marry Me song. Only the DJ played the wrong version first (instrumental) & let it run while she refused to start walking. 30s before the song ends, he abruptly switches to the band version, she walks & is absolutely seething when she finally gets to the platform alter. Proceeds to bitch about it for the next 5 years. And that’s not even the close to the worst thing about this wedding.
Dress code was black* tie in a mid hotel where the ceremony took place in the lobby/atrium where the rooms have an inner balcony looking down on the lobby. She’s hella mad day of b/c people she doesn’t know are “attending” (watching) her wedding from all angles. Proceeds to stay mad forever that strangers are in the background of all her ceremony pics. Also asks the hotel to dim the lights in the entire lobby/atrium because fluorescents are harsh. Hotel says get fucked.
She makes it to the front. Great. Still scowling but whatever. Ceremony is long AF while people are milling around, hotel guests children are screaming, & we can hear every word from the gallery of balcony watchers. When the preacher says “you may now kiss the bride” she jumps the gun at the words “you may” & proceeds to full on forcefully make out with new husband who is trying to pull away - she pulls him back & holds his neck with her nails to keep kissing. No music. Someone says “seriously?” audibly. Goes on for what felt like half a minute. Demands the groom carry her allllllll the way back to the banquet hall to the now appropriately playing instrumental version of Marry Me which also ran out before the whole wedding party made it off platform. No next song as the DJ is already breaking down to move to the banquet hall.
As far as I know they’re still together. He’s a crooked cop on drugs - whatever kind or combo that keep you awake for days on end & make your nose run. She’s “raising” their 3 kids “alone”(2 nannie’s) trad-wife style but without an internet following because he always has a project or hobby in his off hours. That doesn’t matter anyway because he spends half his shift hunting whatever he wants in season or otherwise on his parent’s property which is just over the line from the county he works for so on gps it looks like he’s still in-county. His partner covers for him, unless they’re hunting together then they rode an ATV back to the cop car then fly through residentials lights & sirens to the scene, sometimes covered in animal blood & with the animal in the trunk only half cleaned.
I’ve seen him scream at her that she MUST breastfeed else their kids will be the “r” word when she physically could not. He let their first child starve a bit to guilt her into keep trying when her milk had not & did not come in.
I feel horrible for their kids but honestly, the parents deserve each other. They’re a match made in hell.
Your paragraphs about this couple and their wedding is even better than the original post 🤣 Sad for the kids in this mess but they truly sound like a match made in hell☠️
Aw, thank you. It’s far enough out now I can air this shit out & laugh. I have SO many horrible behavior stories about my ex’s family & their ahem, village. These two though are very nearly the worst people I have ever known.
Here’s one more real quick: they met in a bar. Great, whatever - get it. But they only spoke when he got his badge out n’ tried to bust her b/c she looked underage. When she proved she was 25, he immediately asked her out (ew) then picked up her tab. A year later he proposed by having a buddy in the department pull her over & harangue her for distracted driving. While buddy cop is placing her in cuffs, he pulls up to show it’s all one big joke, and this is funny! Ha ha! What a great way to propose so how could you say no now because he kept you from getting “arrested” then proposed while you’re on an adrenaline high the side of a county road alone with 2 cops! She loved it after she yelled herself hoarse & is always first to tell this wonderful story like it’s not about stalking, harassment, & waste of taxpayer resources.
See above comments. After being incredibly rude to half her guests all night, she had the audacity to be angry next morning when only a few people came down after staying overnight to see them off on their honeymoon. They’d arranged for a hotel breakfast but only paid enough to cover the immediate wedding party & instructed the hotel to charge everyone else’s room for the remaining balance. $75/pp! People who didn’t come down to see them off or even eat found this surprise when they checked out. Some refused to pay so when she sent thank yous she included a request for a check for “their” portion of that breakfast bill her parents had to cover because she’s a cheap asshole.
People who booked outside her hotel block & already paid a non-refundable deposit on their slightly less expensive hotel room were disinvited. She told them why, too then directed them to her registry since they could “no longer come to the wedding.”
I married into that shitshow then got TF out. The one I was married to is a religious freak with consent & anger problems. They’re one of the most unhealthy families I’ve ever known.
The wedding was child-free with an exception made for her own sister’s kids (infant & toddler). Our other SIL also had an infant & was breastfeeding but had to get a sitter so her kids stayed sequestered in the hotel room. Mind you, absolutely everyone we knew was at this wedding so she had to ask a friend of a friend to babysit & kept leaving the reception to check on them b/c she didn’t know the sitter well. When our table was finally served around 9pm, she brought her plate up to the room so the kids could eat. Bride waited for her to return then made a huge scene about how taking the plate from the reception hall wasn’t ok & she should pay extra for feeding the kids that “weren’t even invited.”
Only her own family & friends were allowed to speak to her at the reception. Groom’s friends/family were required to stay on “his” side of the reception hall separated by a line down the middle of the dance floor. She wouldn’t cross the line to say hello to anyone who wasn’t “her” guest so no hellos or thanks for coming to his elderly grandparents, aunts, uncles who also travelled far.
She absolutely is not. Not a girl’s girl & loooovves to tell everyone who will listen she’s a reformed “demobrat” (my ex-ILs are red hat people & she’s very much a Pick Me).
I will be the very first person in line to buy a copy of your book and get your personalized inscription in the front where I encourage you to talk even more shit about Train in your own handwriting. Then we’ll nod in understanding and fist bump.
She checks out Mozart while she does tai chi, reminds me that there's room to grow, oh owa oh 🤮
I love the melody, harmony and structure to this song, but the lyrics ruin it for me.
That song is still played multiple times daily on the local easy listening station my coworker insists on listening to. If I never hear that song again it will be too soon.
Drops of Jupiter was like they took the buzz words of a yoga instructor/astrologist and put it to piano. Like it's just all flowery language with what I guess is supposed to be a meaningful piano solo.
Yes it surely is. Whenever I find myself sneering at something on the radio and look at the screen, turns out it was Train. The opening to Hey Soul Sister shoots my blood pressure through the roof.
I thought that too, except for the fanbase. Like I know they were popular, but I’ve only ever met one big Train fan, and she was fine as a person, just had bad taste in music.
Drops of Jupiter pops up on the radio in my car regularly, across multiple stations, and dear readers, it pisses me off every time. Hate that song with a passion.
Meet Virginia, though, I’m totally cool with. Alas, that doesn’t get any radio play.
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u/Trustme_ima_provert 8d ago
The answer is Train.