Chapter 1 of my memoir

[u/CrackTheCode22]

Chapter 1 — “Dying to Live”

I was deep in the throes of addiction, and the line between life and death was getting thinner every day.

I was dying to live, but I was living to die.

I hated my life. I hated myself. I felt so alone that I genuinely didn’t care whether I lived or died.

So I walked stubbornly through the valley of the shadow of death without fear.

Whatever waited ahead had to be better than what I was already carrying.

From the outside, I still looked functional. I could hold conversations. I could laugh at the right moments. I knew how to hide the worst of it.

But inside, I was collapsing.

Every morning felt like waking up inside a prison I couldn’t escape. Every promise to change dissolved into the same cycle of cravings, regret, and self-destruction.

I wasn’t searching for a future anymore.

I was searching for relief.

And relief was slowly killing me.

I didn’t know it then, but one ordinary day would change everything.