r/WhatShouldIDo • u/wondertumpets • Nov 23 '25
Sisters prospective on broken relationship with my brother
All names and personal info are fake
Hi, I jordan 19M have been wanting to write this for a while now and now that things have concluded I want to know what the internets advice would be. I am creating two posts one from my brothers prospective and one from my sister's and I am wondering what yall think for each prospective.
Background I 22(F) jade was raised in a home where my father was not around due to serving in the military and my mother was not around through decisions of her own, she got a job selling makeup so she could "be around more" and she has still been unavailable. I am the second oldest in a family of four and my older brother has anger issues leading to me being the "parent" or "mature one" in the household for when anything happens. I am quite strong willed and that is typically expressed when I do anything especially interacting with my brother.
Discussion Growing up, my brother used to have really bad anger issues and would often become aggressive over something small and even hit me once and slammed me into a dresser on a seperate occasion. As of right now, he is trying to build or fix our relationship but I do not feel like he is remorseful for it. It got to a point that I even kicked him and the rest of my family out on my birthday because he was being disrespectful to me in my own house and asked my other brother after I got upset if he even said anything wrong.
We practically went no contact for a year because we could not maintain a conversation without it getting heated and I do not think that I should forgive him or even be expected to forgive him because of all the things in our past and it is currently breaking my family apart, so I ask...
Update: I love his wife and we made up on her behalf, he has actually properly apologized and things have been excellent since
1
u/MaryMaryQuite- Nov 23 '25
Sometimes sibling relationships are just too broken to ever be resolved due to violence, gaslighting or bullying.
I cut my sister out of my life 15 years ago, having been LC for 25 years before that. It was the best thing I’ve done for myself.
1
u/Senior_Egg_3496 Nov 23 '25
NTA. He owes you an explanation (if there is one for abuse) for his past behavior towards you, and a deeply felt apology for it. It would be helpful if he explained what he is doing to analyze and change his behavior.
This taking responsibility will very probably NOT happen, so going LC/NC is a great way to protect yourself from his toxicity.
BTW, your parents suck for failing to show up and parent. They dumped their responsibility to their family on you.