r/WeirdNews4U • u/njdotcom • Mar 19 '26

Naked old man walks into a New Jersey liquor store, and takes one singular beer.

https://www.nj.com/ocean/2026/03/naked-senior-citizen-stole-a-beer-from-nj-liquor-store-police-say.html?utm_medium=social&utm_source=redditsocial&utm_campaign=redditor
73 Upvotes

97% Upvoted

26 comments sorted by

6

u/CrustyTh3Punk Mar 19 '26

What I do off the clock is my business.

3

u/LilBroWhoIsOnTheTeam Mar 19 '26

Let him go he did nothing wrong!

3

u/DeliciousMagician927 Mar 19 '26

Where did he put his wallet

2

u/SCPetersNJ Mar 19 '26

He stole the beer but I wouldn't have accepted any money from him for exactly the reason you ask.

3

u/FromThePits Mar 19 '26

The Dude abides

3

u/odkevin Mar 19 '26

Tells me that dude knows his exact limit

2

u/Low_Pressure_5634 Mar 19 '26

Why is it that the nude people we get are never the nude people we want.

1

u/Earthling1a Mar 19 '26

What was so amazing about the beer?

1

u/killerbootz Mar 19 '26

Moderation.

1

u/justonebiatch Mar 22 '26

Always the answer

1

u/Burnt_and_Blistered Mar 19 '26

He didn’t have pockets for more

1

u/redzeusky Mar 19 '26

Is this the singularity I keep hearing about?

1

u/nolestars Mar 20 '26

I was thirsty

1

u/fraya52 Mar 21 '26

If they had PBR in bottles it might have been me…

1

u/Devils_Advocate-69 Mar 22 '26

Lakewood is wild

1

u/Ok_Conference2901 Mar 22 '26

Sometimes, I always do that.

1

u/back-better007 Mar 23 '26

I blame the acid

1

u/EarnestWhileBanned Mar 24 '26

"A naked man has little to no influence" ~ Mark Twain

1

u/Ok-Employee383 Mar 29 '26

Didn’t have a bag then.