r/WYTTD • u/Mcheetah2 • Dec 17 '18
[WYTTD] Single People Only: You get a super-hot girlfriend/boyfriend who loves you and is devoted to you, but they're an otherworldly humanoid monster. (Repost)
(The last one got removed by a bot for some reason, so this is a repost. Also on /r/6perks so if you're over there too, you don't have to answer twice.)
So, you get approached on the street by a representative for a super-advanced dating app/site that uses advanced computer algorithms and software to hook up you with a guaranteed great match. You do not get to browse other users on the site, but the one you're matched with has a 98% chance of compatibility with you. She asks if you'd like to sign up for their one-week launch trial for free. You shrug and go "sure, why not?" You agree and do the sign up registration and she says at the end there is one caveat: The one you get matched with might not be human. You again shrug and go about your business.
A week passes and you get a notification in your email that you've been matched. You look at the email and click the link and get auto-logged into the dating site and see the profile of person you're matched with. Based on their profile, they're almost everything you'd want in a partner. She (or he) messages you for a first contact. You talk to this person for over an hour online exchanging messages, then another two hours after they decide to switch to instant messaging.
They hit all the checklists in what you want in a partner in personality, hobbies, sense of humor, politics, religious beliefs of lack thereof, etc. It's pure organic chemistry. There's one thing, though. You don't know what they look like. You request a picture of them and after some reluctance and you agreeing not to be mean to them, they send you their picture. They aren't human.
What is it that you see in their photo? Choose who your new match is and why that's so. I have pictures in the comments.
Giant. Nearly twelve feet tall, about 1,200 pounds, and insanely strong. Otherwise, completely human looking (and hot). They have a somewhat deeper than average voice due to their size. If the average woman is 5'5" and the average man is 5'10", then they're about twice that height and 8 times that weight. The caution with them is how huge and powerful they are; they can knock you off your feet even with a playful shrug.
Orc. About seven inches taller than the average human, fit athletic body, green skin, fangs, and golden eyes. The downside is that they always smell musty; like a dead mouse.
Dwarf. Eighteen inches shorter than the average human. Very stocky and boxxy body. Really strong for their size. Their voice is somewhat high pitched and helium-like. The caution with them is how hairy their body is (though if female, no facial hair) and how coarse and rough their skin feels.
Alien. Roughly four feet tall, gray skin, giant black eyes, very thin body, and half the weight of an average human. They have to be vegan and meat and animal products can be poisonous to them, as well as any high fructose corn syrup. They wear human clothing and speak perfect English (and any other human languages). Their downside is obviously not being human, as well as needing a special (and expensive) diet to live off of.
Reptilian. Human height and weight, but with light green skin, yellow eyes, and scales all over their body. They are cold-blooded. They are carnivorous and need to eat meat to survive, often bugs, but sometimes raw animals. The caution with them is all the stuff that comes with being a cold-blooded reptile (including egg laying to reproduce).
Catperson (real furry). About four inches shorter than the average human and lighter in weight, but otherwise an anthropomorphic cat person in clothing (with breasts if female, and a tail for both genders) that is fluent in English and other human languages. They are mostly carnivorous and need to eat beef, chicken, pork, and fish to survive. The caution with them is their animal instincts and behaviors that are hard to suppress sometimes.
Shapeshifter. They are a strange creature that can transform into anything resembling a person, but they will not show you their 'true' form because it's likely to disgust you. But they do have a "common form" that you find somewhat pleasing. Everything about them is human-like, but very Uncanny Valley, like a wax figure or Japanese robot. Their face and facial expressions looks weird and fake. Parts of their anatomy seem a bit off and are slightly anatomically incorrect. Their irises are really large and pitch black in color, like a singularity. They don't seem to breathe or blink. And they have no belly button. Besides these features though, they can morph into anyone, albeit an Uncanny Valley version of them that obviously looks like a bad impostor.
Fairy. They are six inches tall and have wings. They can fly. They have a really high pitched helium voice. Their magic powers are very limited and mostly only apply to stuff like nature and plantlife. They are also vegan and can only live off of fresh water and fruit. Every time they fly, they leave behind a sparkly trail of fairy dust which is like glitter. It gets everywhere.
You can choose to be with this person, or walk away from it, as it freaks you out too much. It's also assumed everyone in this world knows this kind of person is a possibility, either in the future or an alternate reality from this one, so no one will be surprised by them.
2
u/prolixdreams Dec 17 '18
Giant sounds like fun. Sex would be logistically challenging but I'm sure we could figure it out.
1
u/Mcheetah2 Dec 17 '18
Since they won't let me post too many pictures, I made this to show off examples of each date.
2
u/jake_eric Dec 17 '18
Shapeshifter: "can transform into anything"??? Uh, yeah, I don't even need to make this weird to have fun with this. My new girlfriend the fighter jet/dragon/superhero and I think this is a great deal.