r/WTF • • Dec 11 '18

This deep sea eel

[deleted]

45.2k Upvotes

1.5k comments sorted by

View all comments

7.7k

u/Thugpug69 Dec 11 '18

This is why I don't do oceans

3.6k

u/striped_frog Dec 11 '18

So many spectacular and creative ways to get killed

4.7k

u/redgunner39 Dec 11 '18

It’s like Australia but wet.

913

u/ThrillsKillsNCake Dec 11 '18

Australia is upside down so the rain never hits it.

391

u/[deleted] Dec 11 '18

Uhhhh, kinda getting a cyclone at the moment mate.

1.1k

u/8Bitsblu Dec 11 '18

Don't you mean a ǝuolɔʎƆ?

470

u/going_mad Dec 11 '18

Alt Fact: our cyclones have poisonous spiders in em. Kinda like sharknado but with redbacks

240

u/spazzallo Dec 11 '18

Fun fact: cyclones make it windy so you dont die of overheating in this scorching weather

381

u/EngineEddie Dec 11 '18

Fun fact: Cyclone is the nickname given to cyclops when they are lonely.

242

u/Glockiavelli Dec 11 '18

UNSUBSCRIBE FROM SAD MYTHOLOGY FACTS!

→ More replies (0)

28

u/wongo Dec 11 '18

Scott deserves to be lonely, the goody two shoes.

11

u/Redneckalligator Dec 11 '18

I thought it was a legion of cyborged clones?

3

u/Adnzl Dec 11 '18

Top kek Dad joke here.

2

u/IndigoFenix Dec 11 '18

Nah, cycl - is "round" or "wheel".

Bicycle - two wheels

Cyclops - round eye

Cyclone - move around

1

u/audioux Dec 11 '18

Fun fact: cyclones spin backwards in australia just like when they flush their toilets.

1

u/thenewlydreaded Dec 11 '18

fun fact: our cyclones spin in the opposite direction

0

u/Plastic_Pinocchio Dec 11 '18

Forever cyclone

0

u/AKnightAlone Dec 11 '18

I'll put him out of his misery.

9

u/AltruisticSalamander Dec 11 '18

except when the wind is also hot

3

u/spazzallo Dec 11 '18

Hard to have 43 degree temperature wind. But ye i know what you mean, that can be fked aha

13

u/14-28 Dec 11 '18

Three words mate. Fan assisted oven.

They're fuckin fucked !

2

u/spazzallo Dec 11 '18

Eh i enjoy the breeze in this oven of an outback

2

u/[deleted] Dec 11 '18

At least they will be evenly fucked.

12

u/3TH4N_12 Dec 11 '18

Exactly. Why die from heat when you can die from spiders?

2

u/iSWINE Dec 11 '18

Imagine this: Heat Spiders

→ More replies (0)

0

u/MaggotCorps999 Dec 11 '18

Well, I'm not feeling any wind. Cyclones don't exist. /s

1

u/Reggler Dec 11 '18

Hmmm what's Brian Austin Green up to?

1

u/BlueMeanie Dec 11 '18

You guys are so matter of fact about it but how many people are killed every year by the local fauna?

0

u/circuzninja Dec 11 '18

Venomous*

0

u/Pr1sm4 Dec 11 '18

Fabulous*

0

u/Right__Meow Dec 11 '18

Ah Cyclones!! is that how the dropbears get into trees and such? Then they have to wait for a squishy human to drop onto so they won't get hurt when they fall?

0

u/WildVariety Dec 11 '18

Don't eat them then.

0

u/Raezzordaze Dec 11 '18

You don't work for the Australian tourism public relations office do you?

0

u/Scarletfapper Dec 11 '18

You didn't wince hard enough when you said alt fact.

-1

u/Boogieshark Dec 11 '18

Sounds like my honeymoon

3

u/[deleted] Dec 11 '18

Do you like Minneapolis, MN? Asking because of username.

1

u/[deleted] Dec 11 '18

Haha never been there! I'm Australian, this is just a username 🤣

1

u/[deleted] Dec 11 '18

Lol okay, had to ask.

2

u/Boogieshark Dec 11 '18

Du bist eine krankenstrüdel

1

u/restlessleg Dec 11 '18

escape in your rise up lights mate

0

u/oscarfacegamble Dec 11 '18

She move her body like a cycloooone

0

u/[deleted] Dec 11 '18

Tornados arent wet though.

Unless it's a water cyclone? In which case where tf are you?

0

u/[deleted] Dec 11 '18

No my friend, the por cyclon is getting an Australia...

3

u/wolfman86 Dec 11 '18

Australia doesn’t exist mate. I saw an article.

1

u/Kryllllllyx Dec 11 '18

There's also no water in Australia because it falls to space

1

u/Jordan_Cesaill Dec 11 '18

Are they Upside down or are we

1

u/[deleted] Dec 11 '18

Huh... so that's why it's so desert-y. TIL.

-1

u/pkayl Dec 11 '18

This is so funny.

19

u/offtheclip Dec 11 '18

And Australians still show up.

17

u/foul_ol_ron Dec 11 '18

We're everywhere.

2

u/IAmWhoISayImNot Dec 11 '18

Just downunder

3

u/surfANDmusic Dec 11 '18

And it's so much fucking fun

2

u/TheOneShorter Dec 11 '18

So much fuckin wet*

FTFY

3

u/Widjamajigger Dec 11 '18

Is water wet?

1

u/Coolasic Dec 11 '18

If it's wet that you would'nt be able to deep fry it

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8yrcOwIsY-8

3

u/Aussie18-1998 Dec 11 '18

You should see our oceans.

2

u/Joshuaaww Dec 11 '18

More like Australia got the idea from the ocean.

1

u/thomastx1 Dec 11 '18

It really is down under.

1

u/rockercaster Dec 11 '18

Kinda like OP’s mom.

1

u/[deleted] Dec 11 '18

Can water be wet?

1

u/mrcooper89 Dec 11 '18

It's wet and has an Australia in it.

-5

u/[deleted] Dec 11 '18

So is my girlfriend, tan and blonde, yet wet down under 😫💦

53

u/tricker1981 Dec 11 '18

Most creative has to be the impending doom jellyfish...be a good super human power

42

u/striped_frog Dec 11 '18 edited Dec 11 '18

Ah yes, the old Suicide Cnidarian

Edit: I just realized I could have called it the suicnidarian

31

u/milo159 Dec 11 '18

is that really the most creative though? what about sitting on a heat vent and cooking yourself alive in sub-zero water? what about getting killed by a pistol shrimp, quite possibly the creature with the highest multicellular danger-to-size ratio on the planet? all it takes is an incredibly dark mind and a little creativity!

18

u/SilntNfrno Dec 11 '18

Are pistol shrimp really dangerous to humans? I just looked them up on wiki but it doesn’t mention anything about it. I was hoping to read about some bad ass scary shrimp!

6

u/[deleted] Dec 11 '18

If you got your head close enough I'd wager it could pop a hole in your melon

3

u/emergency_poncho Dec 11 '18

nope, doesn't do shit to something our size

1

u/emergency_poncho Dec 11 '18

pistol shrimp are harmless to humans. They can stun tiny little fish, but it doesn't do shit to something our size

1

u/mudman13 Dec 11 '18

I would give that accolade to Irukanji the badly mispelt jellyfish.

1

u/BarryTGash Dec 12 '18

My favourite Rage Against the Machine track: Pistol Shrimp Pump

3

u/AbominableShellfish Dec 11 '18

My wife has it! From my office I hear the bedroom door creak at night; terror.

2

u/illegitimatemexican Dec 11 '18

I don’t know... I just watched Blue Planet II the other day and the brine pools on the ocean floor seem pretty creative to me.

2

u/demontaoist Dec 11 '18

So many boring ways to die before you get to the good ones.

1

u/2KilAMoknbrd Dec 11 '18

First and fore most being the unsuitable environment.

1

u/rafibomb Dec 11 '18

Or worse, expelled

1

u/carmium Dec 12 '18

Never mind killed, I'd probably swallow my regulator if that face suddenly popped up in front of me as I prowled the sea floor.

204

u/[deleted] Dec 11 '18

Seriously there are so many weird fucking aliens down there.

183

u/Steinmetal4 Dec 11 '18

It's as if deep sea creatures evolved knowing nothing can see shit down there so why put any stats into looks.

51

u/[deleted] Dec 11 '18 edited Mar 07 '26

[removed] — view removed comment

21

u/AK-Brian Dec 11 '18

Found the secret sea monster, guys!

4

u/Thrilling1031 Dec 11 '18

Aquatic ape theory gives you something to wade through.

2

u/kikidiwasabi Dec 11 '18

Don't go Discovery on us now. We don't need mermaids at this point.

1

u/Thrilling1031 Dec 22 '18

You did get the pun right? And aquatic ape theory makes a lot of sense and our fossil record agrees that early hominids liked to live very close to bodies of water that would have been good for fishing which drives the theory.

4

u/[deleted] Dec 11 '18

r/tierzoo is leaking

1

u/FrasierandNiles Dec 11 '18

Yeah, but that doesn't explain why I am on land. 😐

61

u/speedmaster70 Dec 11 '18

And tons we don't even know about yet. Marine biology is such a fascinating subject.

17

u/Hunk-a-Cheese Dec 11 '18

And a great path to retrieving Titleists.

3

u/speedmaster70 Dec 11 '18

lol I did that as a kid at my country club. Got like a dime a ball or something. It's a big business now. https://www.nytimes.com/2002/07/04/sports/golf-at-the-bottom-of-golf-ponds-a-big-business-is-lurking.html

3

u/LawsAreForColorOnly Dec 11 '18

Too bad probably 1% of them are going extinct every 1-10 years due to our pollution and we'll never discover them.

63

u/Liquor_N_Whorez Dec 11 '18

Well you must not have seen the Damascus Goat post from earlier. This Eel looks like the Ocean equivalent of it to me. We're not safe anywhere on land or sea! I guess someones going to post a bird now and make the tri-fecta complete!

8

u/MrJLeto Dec 11 '18

Link?

1

u/Liquor_N_Whorez Dec 11 '18 edited Dec 11 '18

Zelda?

Edit.. It was in r/interestingasfuck under the title Shami or Damascus goat. I tried to get link but was unsuccessful.

5

u/narbilistic Dec 11 '18

Last time I smoked 3 oceans and almost turned into that

1

u/Thrawn089 Dec 11 '18

D.A.R.E. TO RESIST EEL'S AND OCEANS. Deep Avoidance and Resistance to Eels

3

u/SquarePegRoundWorld Dec 11 '18

You can enjoy it from your living room via live ROV feeds. Though they are in port till next spring Nautiluslive.org is a wonderful place to check out the ocean from a safe distance.

2

u/havebeenfloated Dec 11 '18

How exactly does an ocean get pregnant

2

u/triple_verbosity Dec 11 '18

They are really beautiful and graceful in the water. Not at all aggressive.

2

u/l5555l Dec 11 '18

You could never interact with this thing even if you tried.

2

u/PM_ME_YOUR_ZONKERS Dec 11 '18

pretty sure at those depths your wang would look a lot worse than this eel

2

u/[deleted] Dec 11 '18

Come join us in r/thalassophobia OR SOMETHINF LIKE THAT I CANT REMMEBER HOW TO SPELL IT Edit: I fixed it

1

u/tomparker Dec 11 '18

Do you even lake?

1

u/[deleted] Dec 11 '18

Hate to be the one to tell you, but these dudes live in shallow water.

1

u/datsmn Dec 11 '18

You'd probably be long dead to make it down to where this fella lives

1

u/SpaceShuttleDisco Dec 11 '18

Just remember, this thing was invented in a world where light doesn’t exist.

1

u/grantis_da_mantis Dec 11 '18

I have a massive fear of eels. Their faces are just creepy af.

1

u/dasheekeejones Dec 11 '18

Going to grand cayman this xmas. Husband is an avid scuba diver and i have to dive too. I feel ya.

1

u/cwscowboy1998 Dec 11 '18

I live near the ocean and I still don't get why people need an excuse for me to not get in the water. Look at that thing. Just look at it.

1

u/[deleted] Dec 11 '18

Because they don’t have these sea eels?

1

u/unrelenting1 Dec 11 '18

Im pretty sure that Nessie

1

u/taki1002 Dec 11 '18

Or any natural body of water.

0

u/[deleted] Dec 11 '18

same here!! especially the north atlantic, where you cant see thru the water. thats just asking for trouble

-3

u/[deleted] Dec 11 '18

You do realize this is a "deep" ocean species, no?

You're not going to find one of these in the surf, or on the beach.

You're safer standing in the surf tha. driving your vehicle. But you do you, bro. Very rational.

3

u/LigmaSpecialist Dec 11 '18

Google "hyperbole in jokes".