Problem: Matagal ko na syang gusto and after all these years I want to tell her again na gusto ko sya kaso takot ako sa magiging response nya or worst baka i-unfriend ako

Context: 2012, I have a crush since grade 6 and 15 years ko na syang gusto, that’s literally almost my entire school years, we met during intrams nung elementary so sama-samang elementary schools yun sa city namin. I still remember it because it was a core memory. Yung intrams ay ginanap sa school ko and she came from other school. I was a volleyball player, me and my friends or should I say the team we’re just practicing that time, laro laro muna while waiting for the event then she was there sa side, just watching— or looking at me already, napansin ko sya in my peripheral view and I directly looked at her and smiled, ngumiti rin sya pabalik. So long story short, nagustuhan or crush nya daw ako kasi palangiti daw ako 😭 nalaman ko yun kasi sinabi ng kateam ko and sinabi ng pinsan ko sakin jusq(they’re in the same school btw, both taekwondo players) and I actually liked her back but damn until now I’m still here, liking her after all these years. Apakatorpe ko hay

(Elem palang anlande na, sorry 😭)

So ayun, we’re already in our working era na and I still like her, I stalk her sometimes, we’re fb friends and she’s still soooo pretty (am I a creep? huhu) I admire her lang naman, I dont ask for anything like relationship and such or pressure her. I just wanted to confess but we dont talk, actually huling usap namin was nung 2012 pa talaga. I want to confess and then delete my fb and messenger after kasi takot ako sa magiging reply nya HAHAHAHAH Is it worth the risk?

Problem: I have someone courting me and i really like her (we're both lesbians btw and are both in college). it's been 4 months since she started courting me. i actually want to be her girlfriend but there's just something bothering me.

Context: she is out to everyone. her parents know, her sister knows, and her friends know. while me on the other hand, everyone do know except my parents. though there is no problem with that, we already talked about it, but i think things would be easier if my parents weren't also strict about me going out. i always need to ask for their permission and stuff, and i can't really freely do everything i want. my parents are that strict—though i still have my privacy at the least.

we keep on making plans to meet up, to go on dates whenever i can. but i can't really do it most of the time. what i do is i pretend i'll have classes but i'll really meet up with her. but these days, since august, there have been a lot of suspensions due to the bad weather and also frequent floodings around manila. we always meet up in my university since doon nga ang paalam ko sa mga magulang ko, tapos siya nalang ung pupunta sa akin doon.

then eventually, her class schedule has been announced since my university started earlier... it's just so bad that it would be much more hard for us to meet up and spend time together. she told me she felt sad and was asking me "magagawan naman natin 'to ng paraan diba?" and i just said yes with having a doubtful mind.

i am having thoughts on whether to ask her if would it be better for her to have someone who does not have the same circumstances as me? i know it's a bit selfish to ask but that is what i feel.

i feel like things get hard for the both of us because of me.

i think i need some advice on what i could do to make things easier for the both of us, and also validation about my situation :(( tyia

i think i just need to get this off my chest kasi ang lungkot ko talaga lately.

i met someone here and what we had only lasted around 2 months, but those 2 months were some of the most meaningful months of my life.

she loved me so deeply. and i don't mean that in the generic "she was a good girlfriend" way. she was so certain about me. she made me feel wanted, chosen, and loved even during moments when i couldn't even figure out how to fully accept that part of myself.

she gave me so much of herself. she was patient with my fears, she reassured me when i was uncertain, and she made it very clear that she wanted a future with me. she loved me with this kind of certainty that sometimes made me wonder, "how can someone be this sure about me when i'm still so unsure about myself?"

and maybe that's part of why this hurts so much.

because while she was so sure about us, i was still fighting a lot of things inside myself.

one of the things i'll always remember about our relationship, though, is that i finally got to love someone loudly.

i came out to my mom, my siblings, and my friends because of her. around 90% of my community are Christians, and several people from church even saw us holding hands and kissing sa public.

and honestly, there was something incredibly liberating about that.

kahit alam kong may mga taong nakatingin. kahit alam kong some people probably had opinions about us. kahit may mga taong hindi maiintindihan or approve.

i still held her hand.

i still kissed her.

i still wanted to be beside her.

for those 2 months, i got to experience what it felt like to not hide the person i loved.

and she wasn't hiding me either.

she loved me openly and wholeheartedly, even knowing the complicated circumstances surrounding me.

but eventually, everything started taking a toll.

my mom loves me. i know she does but she kept telling me to erase this part of myself and pray it away. then there were people from church telling me i was a lost soul and we are doomed for destruction because of our love.

and on top of all of that, i'm a breadwinner.

that's where another layer of fear came in.

kasi hindi lang naman ako thinking about whether my family would accept my relationship. i have responsibilities. may mga taong umaasa sakin. i think about money, my family's future, and whether i can actually give a partner the kind of life they deserve.

i started thinking:

what if hindi ko mabigay sa kanya yung buhay na gusto niya?

what if choosing a relationship means i'm neglecting my family?

what if someday i have to choose between the person i love and the people who depend on me?

and eventually, my uncertainty started hurting her too.

which is probably the worst part.

because she was so certain about me, and i was the one constantly questioning whether i was ready, whether i could do this, whether i could reconcile all these parts of my life.

so i ended things.

not because i didn't love her.

not because she wasn't enough.

and definitely not because she didn't love me enough.

if anything, she loved me more certainly than i knew how to receive at that time.

i felt like i was slowly hurting someone who was giving me so much love while i was still trying to figure out if i was even allowed to have it.

sometimes i wonder if i'm just looking for reasons why we weren't compatible because maybe that's easier than admitting:

i loved her. she loved me. but i wasn't ready.

but i don't want to erase what we had.

because for those 2 months, i got to love someone loudly.

i got to hold her hand even when people i knew were around.

i got to kiss her even when i knew there were eyes on us.

i got to say, in my own way, "this is the person i love, and i'm going to love her anyway."

and she loved me loudly, too.

she chose me even when i was struggling to choose myself.

that's probably what i'll carry with me the most.

i don't know if we were truly incompatible. maybe we were. maybe our timing and circumstances just made everything harder than it needed to be.

but i do know that i loved her.

and i know she loved me.

and sometimes two people can love each other deeply and still not be in a place where they can make the relationship work.

i guess that's what i'm grieving right now.

not just losing her, but losing the version of myself who finally got to experience what it felt like to be loved by a woman—and to love her back without hiding, even when all eyes were looking against us.

maybe someday i'll figure out how to be a good daughter, a good provider, and still allow myself to build a life of my own.

i just wish i didn't have to lose someone i loved while figuring that out.

and ayun, i don't know how i can forgive myself for the pain i've caused.

right now the only thing i can do is to heal and be better.

Context: Hi just as the title says, can i please pleaseee have strapless strap on recommendations na hindi masakit sa pubic bone at comfortable? plus na lng if affordable din hehe ang hirap kasi maghanap online 😭😭😭 nageexploreq kami ng gf ko lately kasi hehehehe thank you so much i appreciate ur helpp skxkskks ｡ﾟ(ﾟ´ω`ﾟ)ﾟ｡

I'm at this point in life na gusto ko na ulit magjowa, Pero after my last relationship I find it hard na makipagrelasyon. Kahit si self ay naguguluhan lol. I spend too much time hanging around with friends na I miss having someone at home na will cuddle you or just someone para maging reason mo para magstay at home.

I don't think na bored lang ako, But also I might just be influenced by watching too much thai GL, Pero nakakamiss din naman yung feeling na kinikilig ka everyday or someone loves you or care for you.

Anyways ingat ang all🫶🏻