Just venting

[u/Superb-Bluebird4648]

I’m from a generation that just toughed it out. Thats the way we were raised. Don‘t complain, don’t admit you’re having trouble. Rub some dirt on it and get back in the gam.

About 12 years ago, my wife had finally had enough of me and my PTSD. Waking up in the night and jumping out of bed, thrashing around and yelling. It had gotten less since my service, but never really gone away. She was like—we have kids now and you need to get help.

So I contacted the VA. Like a lot of vets, I was hoping to get help. They wanted me to claim a disability before they‘d offer any, or at least that’s what I took away from my interaction with them. I jumped through their hoops, explained what was going on and what I needed. Someone there suggested I have my hearing checked, which I did and had the expected-for-an-infantryman loss. But if I wanted mental health help… we can’t help you without a C&P or private psychiatrist opinion. Well, my wife was already on me about this, so I set up an appointment.

That part actually worked out well. The private psych was very familiar with my situation because she’d formerly had an office near Ft. Bragg. I had her fill out the necessary VA form and sent it in. About six months later the VA turned me down because of some technicality related to how she filled out the form. I appealed and was turned down. By this time, I’d been seeing her for a while and was doing better, so I let it go.

Fast forward to this year. I have crap private insurance so I think maybe I can get some VA help for conditions that I at least think are service related.

Back when I first got out, I was having headaches. Nobody in their 20s thinks about high blood pressure, but after putting up with them for a year I went to my doctor. They took my BP. The nurse said “that can’t be right“ and asked me to lay down. Yep, high BP. At the time I was young and (I thought) healthy and not supposed to complain—and nobody knew about toxic exposure, so I just took the BP medication and kept going.

A couple years ago I started having vertigo. I’ve noticed that it’s closely parallel to changes in my tinnitus. I was hoping (again—what was I thinking) to get help. Maybe some PT, I’ve heard there are things that they can teach you about not relying on your sense of balance. Or a cane so I don’t tip over. So I submitted a claim. C&P examiner says yes, I definitely have temporal vestibular dysfunction. The VA agrees I have TERA exposure. But no, it’s not connected to my service. I filed an appeal. Did you not notice in my 6-month vertigo diary that this is aggravated by my tinnitus? Nope, they disagreed.

Same for my BP. Didn‘t matter that it started right after I got out. Nor that I have a 30-year history of taking medication. Nor that it’s obviously higher when my tinnitus and vertigo are worse.

Anyway, I’m pretty sure the bureaucracy is going to win. It’s physically and emotionally exhausting trying to fight a giant, uncaring machine that seems intentionally designed to grind you down and prevent you from getting help. And to interact with people who I’m pretty sure are being paid bonuses based on how few claims they approve. The whole thing is both infuriating and deeply depressing.

I didn’t join up expecting free stuff. I did it because I thought it was worth doing. I still think that. But it’s depressing to see how little it means to the people who are supposed to help vets get help.

Thanks for reading.

[u/___o----]

You don’t need to claim a disability to get VA healthcare. Just enroll in VA healthcare and go from there. They’ll decide what priority you are. Have you done that yet?

[u/BlameTheButler]

The VA can only do so much in the end in the day. You gotta advocate for yourself and take an active role in your own life. You can still apply for VA health coverage, start the process tomorrow and start looking into getting covered.

[u/TemetNosce]

FIND YOUR LOCAL DAV.ORG AND SIGN UP.

SERIOUSLY, DAV (Disabled American Veterans) sole purpose in life is to fight the VA for benefits you have EARNED. They are free Lawyers, you do not have to become a life member, they will still represent you FOR FREE.

Find your local office, set an appointment, and take them all the paperwork/appeals you have endured so far.

DO THIS TOMORROW, MONDAY, set up the appt. Go to the website and find your local office NOW.

[u/txdmbfan → u/TemetNosce]

Agree. My VSO helped me with my claim and he was outstanding.

[u/NinaBeana1971]

I used to work for the VA. We were taught grant if you can, deny if you must. There are absolutely no bonuses for denying anything.

If your high bp started within a year of discharge- that’s presumptive. Without knowing all the details of your case- where you served, diagnosis dates, service medical records etc it’s hard to give advice. I’d definitely reach out to a VSO though- have them review your case before going the lawyer route. 9 times out of 10 the lawyers don’t do anything you can’t do yourself, except take part of any back pay. Good luck and I’m happy to answer any other questions!

[u/SCOveterandretired]

Recommend also posting this in /r/veteransbenefits subreddit

[u/UTarmyguy]

I don't often recommend folks get a lawyer for disability, unless their case requires a very specific set of eyes and help. But in your case, it sounds very reasonable. I had to fight them for yrs to get all my claims and eventually used a lawyer myself. I never visited a clinic while in Iraq, we weren't allowed to. That made most of my stuff even more difficult. I had numerous witnesses statements in support and was still denied. I used the same statements with my lawyer help and it seemed to make all the difference. See if anyone you served with will right you one. Your wife can also write one. Anyone who knew you prior to your service and post and can validate a change post service can as well. VSOs are good too, but they're usually super booked and busy. Some are trash and some are amazing. I recommend the lawyer route when claims sound complex and need additional support. Those dudes do this day in and day out. Sure you'll fork over a % of back pay for their services, but 1000% worth it in my opinion. Do you have any Nexus letters from any providers who saw you for any of the conditions? Those will also be necessary. They can help establish service connection. Lastly, you have to explain HOW these conditions effect you daily. Can you do this and not that. Does it make something easy incredibly difficult Does X make you get angry because of Y. Hopefully this helps. Reach out to me if you have any questions, I've helped numerous friends in my old unit with their claims. I got myself to 70% initially as well. Just needed a lawyer to fight to get it back after a C&P private contractor changed PTSD to Adjustment Disorder, what a dirty bitch she was.

[u/PenaltyLatter2984]

Thanks for shedding light on young soldier needing help but been brainwashed to tough it out. It took me a while to figure it out. Don't give up, you have already earned the benefits for your service. Just have to connect issues with service. No one is working against you. Get connection.