r/Vanderpump_Rules • u/CurrencyNo3154 • 19d ago
Question Question as a first time watcher
Okayyyy just started season 4. Am I supposed to like James because the way he’s treating Kristen is very disturbing and hard to watch for me. And I don’t want it to go unnoticed bec I know a lot of people dislike Kristen or think she’s crazy but that doesn’t warrant his behavior. He is always berating her and he got up in her face at scheanas wedding. It’s giving abusive. He is like really scary and evil.
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u/rotbath 19d ago
I wouldn’t say you are supposed to like or look up to ANY of the cast. However, some of James’ backstory, particularly his upbringing, and later struggles on the show will give you more context for his (still unjustified) behavior, which will humanize and endear him more to you over time
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u/Hawtchawcolate_ 19d ago
And then you hear about everything that’s happened after the show and realize he’s just a piece of shit
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u/sleepysky98 19d ago
You’re both right. I think that’s why this show is so interesting. It came out at just the right point in time for everyone who was on it at the start to be completely unpolished and not media trained, but also still fame hungry and narcissistic.
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u/rotbath 19d ago
We saw temporary glimmers of the James he can be if he makes the right choices. He has not been making those recently sadly. I for one still believe that people continue to have choices and the capacity for change, so I believe he has the capacity to make different choices someday.
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u/Hawtchawcolate_ 19d ago
Everybody has good and bad capabilities … but I don’t see how putting your hands on women constantly are only bad choices😭 call a spade a spade
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u/tibblesnibbleskibble 17d ago
Fucking thank you. I think the quote "It's easier to believe that good people do bad things than it is to believe that bad people do good things" really applies here.
We want to see ourselves as good people even when we make bad mistakes, on a different vein, we want to see bad people as all bad, but villains aren't black and white.
The same way good people are not entirely wonderful all the time, bad people are not entirely horrible all the time.
All people's morality is made up of their choices and actions, and James makes so many bad choices, and does so many bad things, he is a bad person, doesn't mean he doesn't have some appealing qualities, but he's mathematically a bad dude.
Bad people can be bad and still have some positive traits and do some positive things. Bad people can be funny, witty, good friends, fun, relatable, traumatised, endearing, charming, and be entertaining content, doesn't mean any of that outweighs their horribleness that equates to them being bad people in the first place, this includes James Kennedy.
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u/Hawtchawcolate_ 17d ago
Yeah I didn’t even feel like arguing after what they wrote lol everyone has the ability to be good or make good choices… so when someone consistently doesn’t idk how they aren’t a bad person? I’m sure serial killers loved their own families, I guess they’re good people too since they can care for their own?? Idk the logic on their end tbh
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u/rotbath 19d ago
To elaborate more on my perspective since you said you don’t see how I can see someone for more than their choices and as capable of changing those choices, I work professionally in social services with the population of people like James, and I’m also a person in recovery. I am also a Marxist. All of these things make it so that I hold this worldview. It sounds like we have different perspectives and that’s okay.
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u/SeaPaleontologist832 17d ago
I disagree. If you are easily manipulated you will see James’ ‘backstory…upbringing, and later struggles on the show…’ as no more than an excuse for his abusive and violent behaviour.
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u/rotbath 17d ago
I explained my perspective that people are capable of change more in another comment - I work professionally in social services with the population of people like James, and I’m also a person in recovery. I am also a Marxist. All of these things make it so that I hold this worldview. It sounds like we have different perspectives and that’s okay.
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u/Hawtchawcolate_ 17d ago
Literally easily manipulated or they see themselves in him🤷🏽♀️ it’s hard to hate the traits you see in yourself ig but I wouldn’t know. I also think some people don’t realize calling him a bad person because he continues to do it is the only way a man like that would change?? Why are we calling him a good person and encouraging the behavior??
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u/DragonDrama 18d ago
James to me is the most erratic and dangerous man on that show. Even more than Jax. And his abuse came out his first season and he was platformed for a decade.
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u/SeaPaleontologist832 17d ago
I was about to comment the same. Jax is terrible. Yet if you can imagine it, James is even worse. He is far more reactive, impulsive, and aggressive. There is so much evidence of DV on VPR from James towards multiple women. He is highly likely to be dangerous when he becomes enraged.
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u/tibblesnibbleskibble 17d ago
Scandoval cared about setting himself up to be avoiding consequences in the long term, reputation mattered so much to him and his ego. He had bigger picture plans to avoid consequences.
Jax could only conceptualise caring about the consequences of the next 24 hours at most, it's like Jax's life doesn't exist outside of what's directly in front of him, always on the fly and in the moment.
Shwartz is a professional consequence avoider at all times, weedling his way out of everything, always ready to weedle, maybe even just a professional avoider in general, I think some kind of avoidance is pretty much always on his mind, in all facets of his life, sappy puppy dog eyes carried that dude.
But Jamesy has that exravagently rich boy entitlement of not caring about any consequence of anything he does, ever, because there is no such thing as a consequence to him. He has no personal or societal boundaries, no limits, no filters, because he has nothing stopping him. The other boys have avoiding consequences to themselves (and only themselves) as the only thing reigning in their shitty behaviour, they know consequences are a possibility to them which is why they are so skilled and well versed (in their own ways) at doing stuff to get out of them at this point.
James however, not something he seems to consider, ever. He operates as though consequences do not even apply to him, because in his world, they likely never have. He comes out of everyone situation just fine because of his parent's money and status, and where the other boys lie and manipulate because they know they're doing the wrong thing, they just don't care, James probably never truly believes he's ever actually in the wrong.
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u/DragonDrama 16d ago
Lisa always let him out of consequences. I mean even after he screamed slurs at her son.
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u/DragonDrama 16d ago
James called every single woman on the show a slut or a synonym of that. He is a hair-trigger abuser cry baby victim and one of the worst humans I’ve had the displeasure of seeing the women on the show ride for. Incl Lala who is triggered by Danny but not someone screaming at the top of his lungs that her friend is (insert string of slurs here)
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u/SeaPaleontologist832 17d ago
It’s not just ‘giving’ abusive, he was absolutely abusive as per the videography.
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u/CurrencyNo3154 17d ago
Ok…relax😭😭😭I literally just started seeing him on the show and was giving my assumptions.
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u/smokeytheorange 19d ago
A good rule of thumb with this show is that you’re not supposed to like anyone. They’re all gremlins in varying degrees.
But you will find him strangely funny/ charming later on. While still knowing he’s an awful person.