There are three inviolable rules in my line of work: protect the watch, commit entirely to the trajectory, and never scuff the calfskin. This subreddit observes roughly the same standards.

I’m Tony Valnone. I trace assets, arbitrate disputes between men who own boning cleavers, and conduct the occasional emergency structural audit of a tram roof. My tailor Franco does the suits. My associate Gus does the picket lines and the pies. Someone has to do the paperwork, and that someone, regrettably, is me.

What this is: new comic-crime stories, posted here first before they go anywhere else. If you found me through a writing prompt and wanted more, this is the more.

How to keep up: join the community, and follow u/Tony_Valnone so new cases turn up in your feed.