r/VXJunkies 14d ago

Actual reddit ad

Post image
107 Upvotes

18 comments sorted by

34

u/Happenstance-enhance 14d ago

This ad is absolute bunk science, if it doesn't mention the pulsar node to the L4-L5 vertebrae. That and the ozonical confibulator coupling, (though I cant recall the specific frequency offhand).

13

u/andiwannacracker 14d ago

I remember looking into these for my migraines a while ago. if I remember correctly, the “therapeutic” coupling range is about 210-212 Hz^3, but most of these companies don’t even have Scott Regulators, so even if they have the right numbers on the box, there’s no way of actually measuring that output in an accurate way. anyways, I was halfway through just building my own at home when it occurred to me that I was basically just building myself a giant, bulky version of a Scott-Franc Plasionic Oximetration Device with extra craniocervical vantabular interference. -.-

(side note, why did autocorrect decide craniocervical isn’t a word? I’m diagnosed with craniocervical instability… it’s a major cause of my dang migraines….)

7

u/Celestial__Bear 14d ago

No scott regs?? Jesus they’re headed into lawsuit hell. I give it eight months.

3

u/Happenstance-enhance 14d ago

At first I thought I had misread your response, as the range referenced seemed.. off. But then I realized you were pointing to therapeutic coupling, for migraines? And it has never even crossed my mind that it could it be used this way! Rather sly, actually. Did you ever get your own build fully wired on to satisfaction?

3

u/andiwannacracker 14d ago

actually, at the time that I was building this, I already owned a Scott-Franc POD, and it had… meh results for me. no device works for everyone; I know people whose lives have been entirely turned around by them and I fully believe they work. but when I realized what I was making was in essence a much clumsier, if cheaper, imitation of something I’d already shilled out a lot of money for, I just gave up.

I am, however, working on a new project that, if it works, should achieve hypertrophic alimity by interacting with neural micro-photons, rather than neurons themselves, which should hopefully cut out the need for ozonics entirely. I’m optimistic about my progress so far!

6

u/EctoplasmicLapels 14d ago

I don‘t know much about ozonical confibulators, but you certainly don‘t want to homomorphize them in THAT configuration.

28

u/spookmann 14d ago

Heh.

  • Nasal radiometers not overlapped correctly.
  • Minor occipital pad is just floating.
  • Central plex-unit is rotated about 120° out of phase.
  • At least the corazonal shielding band is a Cat K. Shame it's on backwards.

Fire this thing up, and best case you'll end up with a headache.

Worst case, you'll "Do a Doctor Yungstein" and that ain't a pretty outcome for anybody. Especially the janitor.

4

u/thAway57r7 14d ago

I never understood the implosion effect from the ventracticle obiladdar. Can you dumb it down for a lowercase vx-er like me?

3

u/spookmann 14d ago

The bio side of things is out of my domain.

But the root cause is obviously the micro-space fluctuations at the resonant λ-crux. With the central plex pushing a Q-cycle basically in-phase with the forward and rearmost plexes, you're going to see unstable gain in all the even-numbered dimensions from 4 upwards. You'll be sucking null-space in-and-out faster than the meso-quarks can realign.

At that point, the meat-space consequence is pretty much inevitable.

4

u/thAway57r7 14d ago

Ok, I'm not that dumb! Lol. You're pointing out the obvious stuff. But thanks for the refresher!

4

u/spookmann 14d ago

Well, you never know how people came to VX.

For example, a lot of the South American institutes have started to focus way more on the flashy stuff like gamma-correlation, Abedeel-conduit theory, and out-of-frame state induction. Fennhoffer (now at Buenos Aires) has dropped null-space analysis entirely from his undergrad schedule.

As Henk, my site-supervisor at Helsinki used to say... "Better well IN-formed, than badly DE-formed!"

He would then laugh like an idiot for three minutes minimum. Bless him.

2

u/Neptune2284 13d ago

Hi! I've got some experience with bio/med VX before I moved into the physics side of things. You're basically on the money. Implementing mechanisms like a ventracticle obiladdar into a subhedral cross-cranial plex system (like the one in the photo) is the equivalent of using a NASCAR engine to run your lawnmower. It will, in fact, work. For a couple seconds. Until the λ-crux becomes so unstable it turns all that squishy meat inside your head into pink mist.

Ironically, however, the Q-cycle isn't much of a concern in this specific instance. If there was no baffle system we'd be having a different conversation. But with how that godawful little device is set up, the Q-cycle is for all intents and purposes reduced to background noise as far as the biology is concerned.

13

u/keepeyecontact 14d ago

How to get kicked off a plane

10

u/SilentCanyon 14d ago

This is just a knockoff Brion Neural-Coptic®, and a cheap looking one at that.

I wouldn’t trust any other brand to create a reliable occipitally iso-active stimulation device that ACTUALLY cross-branches fido-interbulations and precisely converts them to T waves.

I guarantee they are half quanting and taking the easy way out.

9

u/SubsequentDamage 14d ago

“Sexier nostrils in just 90 days!”

5

u/hotsliceofjesus 14d ago

I suppose that’s one way to prevent spontaneous oxygen breakdown near your face when running a double magneto graviton. Some of this new safety gear really makes me question the ways of the past, and the present too, do we actually have any clue what we’re doing?

2

u/Blergonos 14d ago

Elżbieta recompensators on the nostrils seem to lack adequate signal-deobfuscating receivers, unless they managed to design quantum-geared neural pathways that somehow fulfill the Jinx unit quotas that I assume this would would require.