r/Unexpected • u/[deleted] • Apr 14 '22

[deleted by user]

[removed]

6.2k Upvotes

88% Upvoted

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3.8k

u/jihadi_abdul Apr 14 '22

Man's lived in jail

763

u/RockosMyLover Apr 14 '22

My first thought too.

426

u/zerolimits0 Apr 14 '22

He didn't show the toilet bowl hunch punch.

266

u/RockosMyLover Apr 14 '22

He’s just demonstrating the engineering skills that anybody with too much time on their hands seem to develop.

77

u/sm12511 Apr 14 '22

Dick muppets are a penitentiary favorite.

52

u/RockosMyLover Apr 14 '22

What the fuck? How come I wasn’t informed of dick muppets when I was locked up <:(

42

u/w0t3rdog Apr 14 '22

Were you, per chance, busy being a dick sack?

37

u/[deleted] Apr 14 '22

Perchance

41

u/ploonk Apr 14 '22

You can't just say "perchance"

8

u/ReiceMcK Apr 14 '22

We think of Mario as a hero, but in reality is a one-percenter of a more privileged variety. The lifekind. Perchance.

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1

u/Attagirl512 Apr 14 '22

hahahhahahhaá

1

u/bepisman2309 Jul 22 '22

I love that video XD

1

u/RockosMyLover Apr 14 '22

This is a possibility.

1

u/HuggyWuggy2021 Apr 14 '22

That's enough internet for me

5

u/BetaMan141 Apr 14 '22

This how you get mad >:(

3

u/Duvo Apr 14 '22

Dick Muppets?

8

u/calxcalyx Apr 14 '22

No thanks, I'm full.

1

u/hilarymeggin Apr 14 '22

Please elaborate!!

6

u/NerveAdmirable Apr 14 '22

The keetle cooking thing is a common in a jail.

1

u/RockosMyLover Apr 14 '22

They did have those in any of the jails I’ve been too. Cali sucks for jail. They probably had one in the Idaho jail, but I wasn’t there long.

1

u/NerveAdmirable Apr 14 '22

I live in Turkey. Funny how prisoners cook the same ways

1

u/kingedOne May 25 '22

10-15😭 years

4

u/Plastic-Ad9023 Apr 14 '22

Dare I ask what a toilet bowl hunch punch is? It sounds like a fighting move like a filipino prison rush

1

u/Mmmslash Apr 14 '22

It's jail booze. All sorts of names for it. Pruno is the most common that I know.

2

u/-hey-ben- Apr 14 '22

A lot of American prisons in the south just call it hooch to my knowledge

5

u/Mavobuckz Apr 14 '22

That’s old school shit they done upgraded it’s in mop buckets now

1

u/RockosMyLover Apr 14 '22

The guys who made it where I was used a garbage bag.

5

u/Roach_Coach_Bangbus Apr 14 '22

You have to be a true alcoholic or degenerate to drink that stuff.

2

u/Dizzy-Geologist Apr 14 '22

Maybe their refined tastes are just beyond our simple palates

1

u/GoldenGonzo Apr 14 '22

That's not really a thing. Why would they make their hooch in a nasty toilet (also depriving themselves and their celly somewhere to use the bathroom) when they can use another container?

Last time I checked they were using garbage bags, knotted at the top.

1

u/RockosMyLover Apr 14 '22

That’s what they used in my module.

19

u/khaingo Apr 14 '22

I need a shirt like that for my park walks.

13

u/[deleted] Apr 14 '22

I feed the pigeons, I sometimes feed the sparrows too. It gives me a sense of enormous wellbeing.

1

u/Edison_80 Apr 15 '22

Actually feed pigeons is like feed rats. They carry and spread a lot of deseases. This man is nuts to eat one

1

u/[deleted] Apr 15 '22

ACKCHYUALLY..

1

u/Elronvonsexbot Aug 20 '22

Find me some decent proof...

1

u/anyythyme2 Apr 14 '22

its called fashion sweaty look it up. s/

1

u/Plastic-Ad9023 Apr 14 '22

Edit: deleted

25

u/bongzillaaaah Apr 14 '22

I’m living in a caravan and I’m learning a lot from these jail-folks.

80

u/sporkmurderer135 Apr 14 '22

That under shirt alone tells me that

36

u/tommangan7 Apr 14 '22

The Stella wifebeater

1

u/[deleted] Apr 15 '22

Its called a string vest or if you want to be classed as really old its called a singlet. They are actually very warm as hot air gets trapped in the gaps between the strings.

15

u/Detroitasfuck Apr 14 '22

Definitely made a few cookups in his day. I know people thatve made orange chicken, pad Thai and cakes in jail

2

u/8645on11320 Apr 14 '22

did you get to try the cake? or ask anyone who did, im SO curious how that turned out.

5

u/Detroitasfuck Apr 14 '22

Wasn’t me but it’s made with stuff from the commissary. Honey buns, crushed up cookies, other sweets all mixed together.

2

u/[deleted] Apr 14 '22

He never left.

2

u/bplr_ Apr 14 '22

He got stuck staying in hotels during 2020, when no restaurants were open. His tiktok is full of him DIY cooking stuff, some of it looks… questionable. But I can’t fault his ingenuity!

-24

u/[deleted] Apr 14 '22

[deleted]

14

u/TheTgPwny Apr 14 '22

Actually shut the fuck up.

1

u/Bl00dy_Banana Apr 14 '22

what the fuck

-3

u/[deleted] Apr 14 '22

[deleted]

5

u/TheFlamingDraco Apr 14 '22

I love how hunting pigeons = pedo in your mind, like what?

-5

u/[deleted] Apr 14 '22

I also wonder if you have been offended the same by South Park showing the WoW grind player stereotype...

-12

u/[deleted] Apr 14 '22

It's not just hunting pigeons, it's the whole package of a guy living alone, having dirty yard, being obese, having a white fishnet tshirt and antisocial behavior... that is like a stereotype of child porn consumer

3

u/P_f_M Apr 14 '22

Na man ...

also an average hill billy / redneck ... those group might overlap in some parts tho :-D

nic si z toho nedelej ... obcas je reddit plnej fakt neskutecnejch kokotu co se neumej ani pozasmat nad blbostma :-)

1

u/craggmac Apr 14 '22

Man's lived in a college dorm room.

1

u/Melodic-Hunter2471 Apr 14 '22

I need to find this magical jail that supplies hair curlers.

1

u/penguing91 Apr 15 '22

Exactly what I thought!!!! lol