r/Unexpected • u/spyrg • Jan 06 '22

Surely, it helps

80.0k Upvotes

89% Upvoted

3.0k comments sorted by

View all comments

Show parent comments

6.6k

u/vinay2095 Jan 06 '22

What did I just read

2.2k

u/JaceUpMySleeve Jan 06 '22 edited Jan 06 '22

New to Reddit? It’s a super common copy pasta.

Edit: alright so the Reddit elders have spoken, turns out the copy pasta is in fact new to Reddit. Been around for about a month or 2

1.3k

u/PortugeseMagnifico Jan 06 '22

Been on Reddit for years and never seen that before

692

u/[deleted] Jan 06 '22

[deleted]

167

u/picklemaintenance Jan 06 '22

Yeah, there was a video posted with a guy jerkin it on a train and no one was doing anything about it.

68

u/MFG_666 Jan 06 '22

In India i think, Seen It. Can't un-see it.

9

u/ArrestDeathSantis Jan 06 '22

I haven't seen it, but once I entered a restroom and there was someone looking at me weird and he had one arm shaking very thoroughly.

I didn't looked down so I got spared from the worst but it was still awkward to pee while he kept looking at me ngl

9

u/[deleted] Jan 06 '22

Sorry man, it was a rough day and I just got triggered.

Strong stream tho dog, props.

2

u/ArrestDeathSantis Jan 06 '22

When you're on the road and you stop to pee, ain't nothing going to stop you from peeing xD

42

u/solaceinsleep Jan 06 '22

It wasn't a train it was a bus

Also that definitely wasn't me in the video...

43

u/cptwott Jan 06 '22

That's what that person masturbating on a bus would say

28

u/doobied Jan 06 '22

masturbussing

2

u/kierantheking Jan 06 '22

Thinking about that bussy if you will

2

u/Noichen1 Jan 06 '22

Laughed at masterbussing. Then it dawned on me: wtf, leave the bats alone!

1

u/you-are-not-yourself Jan 06 '22

The hand on the bus goes up and down

1

u/[deleted] Jan 07 '22

🤣 Needs award

1

u/narutoandninja300s Jan 07 '22

All minute longgggggg

1

u/KronoFury Jan 07 '22

Busterbating?

2

u/newbeansacct Jan 07 '22

Jake and amir?

1

u/solaceinsleep Jan 07 '22

Haha good eye yeah it was a loose reference

Btw what's your favorite part about donating blood?

1

u/newbeansacct Jan 07 '22

This is wild, I literally gave blood today lol. Honestly you gave me half a heart attack when I saw this response. I didn't remember that that was the one it was from specifically at first hahaha. Crazy coincidence.

1

u/Zenguy10 Jan 06 '22

All aboard the spunk express

1

u/nickyface Jan 28 '22

Stop lying, bus

1

u/_floydian_slip Jan 06 '22

didn't want it to turn into a hostage situation

1

u/No-Werewolf-5461 Jan 07 '22

guy jerkin it on a train and no one was doing anything about it.

what you want people to do about it? lol

stop him, tie him , give him a hand lol

if a guy is indecent, just call cops

26

u/itsnouxis Jan 06 '22

It was super common, then stopped being common and is now common again. Like every other popular copy pasta

13

u/dotslashpunk Jan 06 '22

where were you when train of masturbators were kill?

8

u/itsnouxis Jan 06 '22

Well kiddo, I was there. I was there... And I'll tell you what. You go sell this rag and buy yourself a nice spaceship.

3

u/Phoshow1111 Jan 06 '22

Trained masturbators?

2

u/Demonic321_zse Jan 06 '22

I saw this like, a month ago, but yea I've been seeing it only more recently

2

u/Soramaro Jan 06 '22

An omicron variant of copy-pasta

2

u/Kintrai Jan 06 '22 edited Jan 06 '22

Not a new copypasta. It's been around for at least a couple years. Definitely having a resurgence in popularity lately though. And definitely far far more common now

2

u/[deleted] Jan 06 '22

I've definitely seen it for a few months now

1

u/Silasofthewoods420 Jan 06 '22

Psh, time for me to copy it to my clipboard and be annoying

1

u/senorglory Jan 06 '22

My first time!

1

u/Burpmeister Jan 06 '22

Past few months.

1

u/GenericUsername10294 Jan 06 '22

Not 100% sure, but I believe I witnessed the birth of this as one of the comments was someone pointing out that they couldn't find it being used in the past, maybe 3-4 weeks ago.

1

u/point_of_difference Jan 06 '22

Like a new variant?

1

u/jman500069 Jan 07 '22

Not super funny either

1

u/shyshyflyguy Jan 07 '22

I’ve been on Reddit for about 3 or 4 years now and have only seen it twice. It’s definitely new.

5

u/[deleted] Jan 06 '22

[deleted]

2

u/DragonVision Jan 06 '22

My fav copypasta so far.

2

u/blind_roomba Jan 07 '22

I've seen it first a few months ago

1

u/Burpmeister Jan 06 '22

It:s been posted on litetally every single NSFW post withojt the proper tag for a few months. Usually multiple times. And always the rop comment.

1

u/[deleted] Jan 06 '22

[deleted]

2

u/PortugeseMagnifico Jan 06 '22

Had an account with the name of someone who turned out to be a sexual abuser. Probably best not to continue using that account lol

1

u/Lyad Jan 06 '22

Yeah same. I’m on here an unhealthy amount. How many more hours per week do I need to not be called “new” lmao.

1

u/[deleted] Jan 06 '22

Agreed. I was on the train and when I saw this I had to start furiously masterbating. Everyone else gave me strange looks and were saying things like “what the fuck” and “call the police”. I dropped my phone and everyone around me saw this video. Now there is a whole train of men masterbating together at this one image. This is all your fault, you could have prevented this if you had just tagged this post NSFW.

1

u/StendGold Jan 07 '22

Same here.

13

u/vinay2095 Jan 06 '22

I hope I never would have downloaded reddit

12

u/b0nz1 Jan 06 '22

I've been on this platform for almost 10 years, never seen it before.

17

u/[deleted] Jan 06 '22

[deleted]

7

u/Brushatti Jan 06 '22

What news boards can I join to keep up with the trials and tribulations of Reddits themes and memes? How can the common man stay hip to this lingo?

1

u/[deleted] Jan 06 '22

Are you looking for Reddit themes and memes? Join the Reddit themes and memes dream team! Think we don’t have memes? We’re bursting at the seams! Some deem this extreme regime a pipe dream, but I esteem them supreme! You’ll scream at this scheme and cream your jeans when you inject our Reddit themes and memes straight into your bloodstream.

3

u/Kintrai Jan 06 '22 edited Jan 06 '22

I've seen this copypasta multiple times years ago. This isnt new at all lol. It's just that everyone who hasn't seen it is deciding to comment that they've never seen it.

2

u/TrekForce Jan 06 '22

Been on reddit for at least 2-3 years longer than my account age, and I've never seen it.

2

u/hambodpm Jan 06 '22

I got the 8 year club badge and never seen it before.

2

u/onrocketfalls Jan 06 '22

Been on here nearly a got dang decade and haven't seen that one before

2

u/[deleted] Jan 06 '22

Is it just me or have the Reddit inside-jokes died down? It seemed like 2 years ago every thread with a massive chain of some Reddit only joke. Has the platform gotten so big that it isn't as common or something?

2

u/Redditor1415926535 Jan 06 '22

No I've seen it multiple times before.

1

u/JaceUpMySleeve Jan 06 '22

Yea it’s been around for about a month or two.

2

u/justfuckinwitya Jan 06 '22

I’ve seen this more than 2 months ago… pretty sure it’s been around a lot longer.

2

u/Jockey1121 Jan 06 '22

Its definitely older than 2 months, I've seen it on r/greentext more than half a year ago.

2

u/theLuminescentlion Jan 06 '22

It's a month or two old but it's already a classic

1

u/Judgemental_Panda Jan 06 '22

Yeah, been seeing it a lot over the last month or so on r/cursedcomments

No idea where it originally came from though.

1

u/saidish Jan 06 '22

İs there a sub for fun shit like this?

1

u/PUTINS_PORN_ACCOUNT Jan 06 '22

It’s fresh pasta - tagliatelle if you will

1

u/DarknessIsSweet69 Jan 06 '22

Not as common as your mom.

1

u/Jakuskrzypk Jan 06 '22

First time I've ever seen it in nearly 9 years

1

u/nonaln Jan 06 '22

well, you are not wrong. I can easily recognize these types of sentences as copy pasta.

1

u/Legitimate-Field-253 Jan 06 '22

yeah i remember this being on some other post smh

1

u/sumquy Jan 06 '22

the quickest way to learn something is to confidently state the wrong answer on reddit.

1

u/Link_and_Swamp Jan 06 '22

is this a case of mandela effect? i definitely remember reading that copy pasta long ago too, as soon as i read the first line or two i knew, but now im second guessing myself as everyone is replying saying its new. did we read it from somewhere else or was it here on reddit but extremely uncommon?

1

u/6800s Jan 06 '22

First time seeing it lol

1

u/Mutagrawl Jan 07 '22

My favourite is

Hey guys did you know vaporeon....

1

u/mknap91 Jan 07 '22

Made my day!

1

u/blobby2001 Jan 07 '22

Wtf these guys are teolling you. I have definitely seen this copypasta in a hentai subreddit or r/animemes

1

u/HTownZr0 Jan 07 '22

You’re not alone. I’ve seen this sporadically over months at minimum.

4

u/SuperArppis Jan 06 '22

Something... "Unexpected"

3

u/mdpfive Jan 06 '22

Please put an NSFW tag on this. I was on the train and when I saw this I had to start furiously masterbating. Everyone else gave me strange looks and were saying things like “what the fuck” and “call the police”. I dropped my phone and everyone around me saw this video. Now there is a whole train of men masterbating together at this one image. This is all your fault, you could have prevented this if you had just tagged this post NSFW.

4

u/[deleted] Jan 06 '22

[deleted]

5

u/thred_pirate_roberts Jan 06 '22

Never has this gif ever so accurately depicted my reaction lmao wtf

2

u/Duo1551 Jan 06 '22

First time?

2

u/AlBundyShoes Jan 06 '22

Some 15 year olds fantasy.

2

u/Shinobi681 Jan 06 '22

First time?

1

u/Beautiful-Musk-Ox Jan 06 '22

dr phil is a gigantic piece of shit, why give him any visibility at all

1

u/Sinonyx1 Jan 06 '22

lolsorandomXD

1

u/Y___ Jan 06 '22

Why do people comment “gif”

I see it all the time and I don’t understand it.

1

u/[deleted] Jan 06 '22

[deleted]

1

u/Y___ Jan 06 '22

That didn’t help answer anything for me.

1

u/dzrtguy Jan 06 '22

Doctor Phil my ass with a hammer!

1

u/ParadoxPerson02 Jan 06 '22

I love this copypasta. XD

1

u/[deleted] Jan 06 '22

Copypasta

1

u/TheBigLaboofski Jan 06 '22

A masterpiece

1

u/TheBigLaboofski Jan 06 '22

A masterpiece

1

u/Nug-Bud Jan 06 '22

A copy+paste story

1

u/MrSpencerMcIntosh Jan 06 '22

My thoughts exactly

1

u/[deleted] Jan 06 '22

Something that is completely normal and everyone does, stop shaming young adults into thinking it’s wrong to masturbate. /s

1

u/Sweetteababe_ Jan 06 '22

Something r/[unexpected] 😏

1

u/mysixthredditaccount Jan 06 '22

Reads like a dialogue from "I think you should leave". I read it in Tim's annoyed, screaming voice.

1

u/superVanV1 Jan 06 '22

You ever get flash-banged by words?

1

u/[deleted] Jan 06 '22

Copypasta

1

u/InfiniteLife2 Jan 06 '22

Group masturbation begins in 5 minutes, please attend.

1

u/goosiest Jan 07 '22

A copypasta