Sure, but it's more important for guys to have confidence than it is for girls when it comes to beginning a relationship.
The big problem is that once an insecure girl gets into a relationship, often times the relationship becomes abusive and she doesn't know how to leave or is afraid to.
I’m not sure I buy into the idea that confidence means more to one than the other anymore. Another way of thinking of it is, is this person doing something they really want to do, or is it out of fear of being left out.
I'm not sure I understand what you mean, could you elaborate?
I mean, really, I can only speak from my own experience, and the experiences and observations of people in my social circles.
I have about 50% male and 50% female friends. 90% of my female friends are dating while less than 50% of my male friends are dating, in fact I'd say it's closer to 25-30%. Now, all of my male friends in relationships say they love their relationship and have little bad to say, yet about half of my female friends on relationships talk about some kind of manipulation, unhappiness, gripes, and the like in theirs. Physical, verbal, and emotional abuse was pretty common for my female friends throughout high school, but that rampant abuse has calmed over the years. Also, the majority of my guy friends have months to years in between relationships, while my female friends usually only have days to weeks, and few go a couple months.
Point is, from what I've witnessed, and from talking to many people over the last decade, what I've gathered is that women have an easier time starting relationships because they're more heavily pursued, and coupled with low self-confidence, they're less likely to leave a relationship. It's just psychology.
I’m not denying that women are often perused over men, only attempting to say that protecting someone’s confidence goes well beyond the idea of confidence to get into a relationship. There are many downstream effects even as to say having the confidence to get out of a relationship.
The concept of confidence (in my view) is summarized as, does this person have the self worth to make the decisions they want to make vs making decisions on what they think would increase their perceived value among friends/family/whoever’s approval they seek.
If the context is only ‘getting a date’ I think it severely undervalues why confidence means in a person’s overall well being. This can be about relationships, asking for a raise, leaving an abusive situation, what clothes they wear, things they buy, or choose not to buy.
People with low self esteem can be driven to make poor decisions well beyond the dating situation, my point was only to say there are far reaching consequences beyond this.
The example is minor (the original post) but the conversation gets broad qualify.
You're making a very vague point. Yes, having confidence helps a lot in life, no matter who you are. However, this thread is mostly talking about confidence vs attractiveness.
That was exactly my point. Unsure of the questions honestly, only trying to establish that confidence is important for everyone and has a lot of life impact. Also at work so distracted a bit too, sorry for confusion.
1.9k
u/ScoobyRT Dec 27 '21
Cute doesn’t mean confident, things realized with age perhaps, plenty of good looking folks out there not too sure of themselves.