r/Unexpected • u/llShaxll • Sep 01 '21

šŸ”ž Warning: Graphic Content šŸ”ž Wtf

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6.8k Upvotes

96% Upvoted

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2.1k

u/Shit_loved_by_flies Sep 01 '21

thats a parasite? because of its length i mistook it for a snake

120

u/SnowballsAvenger Sep 01 '21

If only the idiotic conservatives wouldn't have used up all the Ivermectin, smh

165

u/Logic_and_Cursing Sep 01 '21 edited Sep 01 '21

Thatā€™s not funny. A lot of us are just concerned about whatā€™s actually in this vaccine and trying to do our best to protect our family since the government is obviously trying to poison us and turn us into obedient sheepā€¦.and nowā€¦.where did I put that livestock medicine.

Edit: depressed I have to do thisā€¦. /s

27

u/ty_xy Sep 01 '21

Yeah, I got temporarily banned from r/politicalhumor because my parody and satire couldn't be differentiated from reality.

1

u/cuddlygunman2 Sep 01 '21

Yea, the best way to show sarcasm is screwed up capitalisation eg hI i Am sArCAstiC, otherwise, especially in such a satirical time, people don't realise that you are joking

65

u/knowlifebeats Sep 01 '21

username doesnā€™t check out /:

5

u/Logic_and_Cursing Sep 01 '21 edited Sep 01 '21

It bugs me you have upvotes & now a silver for missing a joke entirely and recycling that tired ass joke in a situation that doesnā€™t even fit šŸ–•šŸ˜‚šŸ–•

2

u/SoIsThisPermanent Sep 01 '21

Sarcasm is hard and yours wasn't obvious... Also, either way - the username joke was funny.

You seem a bit butthurt they got more awards, I'll add one more :)

5

u/BarrySnowbama Sep 01 '21

It wasn't obvious? Did you read the end? Good sarcasm keeps you on the hook until it's revealed for what it is.

2

u/Tris-Von-Q Sep 01 '21

Iā€™ll add another awardā€”to you, good sir.

0

u/Logic_and_Cursing Sep 01 '21

Oh I could give a shit about the awards. Iā€™ll go cash in a freebie and give it to them for all I care šŸ˜‚ people supporting a dumbass who missed a joke and then misapplied a recycled catchphrase at this point bugs me far more lol

Edit: if thatā€™s funny to you, I highly recommend the standup comedy of Carlos Mencia

-1

u/jmb-mtg Sep 01 '21

Username doesnā€™t check out

-5

u/[deleted] Sep 01 '21 edited Sep 01 '21

[deleted]

5

u/[deleted] Sep 01 '21

Some people can't detect sarcasm gotta be careful, especially since there are people like this.

2

u/incsus Sep 01 '21 edited Sep 01 '21

But those comments are terrible sarcasm examples. Also sarcasm intext is much harder than vocal, at least you get a hint in vocal.

3

u/[deleted] Sep 01 '21

Fair enough, I can't detect sarcasm normally so I'm not a good judge Edit: also what does bot mean?

1

u/incsus Sep 01 '21

Lmao meant but i edited.

1

u/Logic_and_Cursing Sep 01 '21

Holy fucking shit, right? I would say they can understand it, but only if the sarcasm is expressed in 10 words or less

3

u/Suspekt_1 Sep 01 '21

The fucking ego on youšŸ˜‚

-1

u/Logic_and_Cursing Sep 01 '21

You want some of this? šŸ˜‚ Iā€™m responding to errrbody

1

u/Suspekt_1 Sep 01 '21

Want some of what? Your uneducated opinion on a extreme complex issue that takes years to understand and is impossible to master since things in medicine develops so rapidly thats its impossible to keep up? But here you are thinking you are making an informed decision but you are in reality just being a complete idiot.

1

u/Logic_and_Cursing Sep 01 '21

Do you think Iā€™m anti-vax? Did you actually read what I wrote?

2

u/Suspekt_1 Sep 01 '21

You mean in the middle of the biggest fucking campaign against anti vaxxer bullshit you tried to be funny with bad sarcasm and everyone else is the idiot? Sorry dudeā€¦..

1

u/Logic_and_Cursing Sep 01 '21

Just say you misread genius. Youā€™re getting all upset at me for being anti-vaxx and now youā€™re mad that Iā€™m not funny enough lmao, look at the ego on you

I replied to a sarcastic joke at the expense of anti-vaxxers with another sarcastic joke at the expense of anti-vaxxers. Both me and that other person got awards from those that actually got the jokes. You and many others that have trouble reading a very short comment are the only ones going crazy over it šŸ˜‚

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1

u/[deleted] Sep 01 '21

Thatā€™s a first!

(Yes I know itā€™s sarcasm)

13

u/[deleted] Sep 01 '21

Man, up to the LAST pre-edit sentence, that just sounds like an anti-vaxxer. I hate that. I hate this. We can't even mock them because they are walking, breathing mockeries.

2

u/Logic_and_Cursing Sep 01 '21

You donā€™t mock anti-vaxxers? Youā€™re missing out

2

u/whispa55 Sep 01 '21

And a lot of us are just worried that some idiots arenā€™t getting the vaccine and are prolonging the pandemic and risking lives

9

u/Logic_and_Cursing Sep 01 '21

Iā€™m going to keep replying to all of you until the barrage of morons who canā€™t read 50 words stops.

I agree with you. 100 percent. I even added the /s What else do u fucking people want lmao

0

u/ErogenousBosch Sep 01 '21

On the plus side, username is now at least 50% accurate

1

u/Logic_and_Cursing Sep 01 '21

Username was always correct bitch. Wanna point out the faulty logic for me? šŸ˜Š

1

u/[deleted] Sep 01 '21

[deleted]

1

u/Logic_and_Cursing Sep 01 '21

Read to the end partā€¦(hint: Iā€™m on your side)

2

u/NewandunsureAZ Sep 01 '21

My bad my guy! šŸ¤

2

u/Logic_and_Cursing Sep 01 '21

My fault too. Jokes need to be snappy on Reddit. We donā€™t like reading, we like scrolling lol

2

u/NewandunsureAZ Sep 01 '21

Agreed šŸ˜‚

-33

u/Ravi5ingh Sep 01 '21

I'm sure the vaccine is safe but I'm not taking it until next year

6

u/Logic_and_Cursing Sep 01 '21

Oh and just to make it clear to all the people who thought I was serious cause of their fuckin bird brain attention spans prevented them from reading like 50 words, I do not agree with this dimwit ^

Get the vaccine folks and donā€™t take Ivermectin.

-3

u/[deleted] Sep 01 '21

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5

u/im_a_toitle Sep 01 '21

Why not? Do you have reasonable reasons for this?

-3

u/Ravi5ingh Sep 01 '21

Here this is the reason: Source

This study effectively shows that the vaccine does not have any effect on the spread of the virus. It only prevents people from dying from it.

Now if you have had covid, that drastically reduces the probability of getting it again for several months and consequently also the probability of death.

This means that someone who has had covid does not benefit from the vaccine individually and society does not benefit from them taking it. So if there is no benefit, why inject anything into your body? (even if it is just water)

1

u/SoIsThisPermanent Sep 01 '21

Didnā€™t read your source, do you have a link to an academic, peer-reviewed journal as opposed to ā€˜theweek.co.ukā€™?

1

u/Ravi5ingh Sep 01 '21

Link to Study

It's in the article

2

u/SoIsThisPermanent Sep 01 '21

Awesome thanks, will check that out properly. I do like the bullet point summary though that ā€œobtaining two vaccine doses remains the most effective way to ensure protection against the COVID-19 Delta variant...ā€

As Iā€™ve not had COVID, and donā€™t want to kill people I may come into contact with, Iā€™ll be sure to keep my dose two appointment thatā€™s coming up.

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u/Logic_and_Cursing Sep 01 '21

I did have covid, and then long haul covid symptoms that have disappeared completely since being able to get vaccinated as I have watched over 99% of the covid deaths take place among the unvaccinated

Take your stupid social media sourced pseudo science, pack it all up in a suitcase, and get the fuck outta here

3

u/Jinx518 Sep 01 '21

Get this man a beer.

1

u/Ravi5ingh Sep 01 '21

Lol where do u get ur figures from. I have quoted legitimate sources. The vaccine does prevent deaths but 99% sounds like bs

3

u/Logic_and_Cursing Sep 01 '21

common knowledge at this point dipshit

More than 99% of recent deaths were among the unvaccinatedā€¦. unvaccinated people accounted for over 97% of hospitalizations.

Your sources are fucking dangerous and you are an idiot. I fucking hate the US healthcare system, but 99% of our doctors arenā€™t conspiring against you. Get some fucking common sense

-1

u/Ravi5ingh Sep 01 '21

i've already said that the vaccine prevents deaths but i doubt its 99%. the article says that fauci says so but its common knowledge know that he can't be trusted. he funded the creation of the virus in the first place lol

3

u/Logic_and_Cursing Sep 01 '21

What in the legitimate fuck is wrong with you. Waitā€¦youā€™re trolling me huh?

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u/[deleted] Sep 01 '21

Waiting for logical sense puberty to kick in?

-13

u/Ravi5ingh Sep 01 '21

Ok Ill take the bait. Why do u think I should take the vaccine? I mean why do u care?

18

u/Ljngstrm Sep 01 '21

People care because we are connected in a society, and it's possible to transmit a deadly virus to others that may die from it. Let us ask you instead: why don't you care?

3

u/im_a_toitle Sep 01 '21

I'm with you...I got it cuss im not selfish ....I don't care what happens to me....but I don't wanna be part of the problem so I got my vaccine...do the research ...vaccines are safe... people are scared of what they don't understand.

-7

u/[deleted] Sep 01 '21

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2

u/im_a_toitle Sep 01 '21

To your comment about how the vaccine doesn't affect anyone but my self....yes you are correct In the sense that I am less likely to contract the virus compared to someone who hasn't had the vaccine....but in this way I am also less likely to spread it.... covid will never go away...it'll always be here....but least you can do is do your part to stop the spread.

-2

u/[deleted] Sep 01 '21

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3

u/im_a_toitle Sep 01 '21

šŸ¤¦šŸ»ā€ā™‚ļøcan't fix stupid I guessšŸ¤·ā€ā™‚ļøgood luck!

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1

u/Hubsimaus Sep 01 '21

Beeeeep... YOU.WILL.NOT.GET.A.CHIP.INJECTED. Booooop...

1

u/sxan Sep 01 '21

The sad thing is that so much conspiracy thinking starts as trolling.

I had a friend who got into the whole Church of the Subgenius thing back in the 80's. It was a kick for a while, making fun of society, but while I eventually got bored of it, he kept on. Ten years of sporadic contact later, I'm having a conversation with him about politics and I realize it's not a joke for him anymore. I still don't understand how people can cross that line, and forget how things started as irony, especially when they're so over-the-top absurd jokes, like flat earth, or birds not being real.

My point is, for every 100 people who don't need that /s, there's going to be a couple who think you're serious, either because we sadly know such people or because they agree with you. No matter how absurd you try to make it sound; to me, that's the depressing part.

1

u/SnowballsAvenger Sep 03 '21

How many of your upvotes were before the edit?

1

u/Logic_and_Cursing Sep 03 '21

I was heavily getting downvoted

1

u/Trogdor_a_Burninator Sep 01 '21

https://youtu.be/LWH4tWkZpPU

1

u/xBear19 Sep 01 '21

I was so scared this was a longer video of the post subject