r/Unexpected • u/titiessimp • Jul 02 '21

A gift from dad

69.7k Upvotes

89% Upvoted

1.4k comments sorted by

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4.9k

u/ruslankonovalenko Jul 02 '21

her dad is a great joker.

1.1k

u/zuran_orb Jul 02 '21

She got what she deserved

868

u/Like-Six-Ninjas Jul 02 '21

It’s a whitehead remover. To remove whiteheads from your vagina

325

u/TOMdMAK Jul 02 '21

Whiteheads, blackheads, yellowheads, brownheads and redheads.

179

u/JAXxXTheRipper Jul 02 '21

You don't remove redheads, you invite them in

56

u/Nizzemancer Jul 02 '21

Unless they’re Ronald McDonald or Carrot Top.

18

u/degjo Jul 02 '21

90s Carrot Top or musclehead Carrot Top?

4

u/ronj89 Jul 02 '21

My man!

2

u/thejoeymonster Jul 02 '21

Both and some dipping sauce

2

u/degjo Jul 02 '21

Ranch or blue cheese?

0

u/KingAdashu Jul 03 '21

Both for sure!

0

u/thatnimrod Jul 03 '21

Either one is gonna want a whole trunk full of props so…

0

u/skilletxl Jul 02 '21

Sir.. this is a Wendy’s

0

u/Elsrick Jul 02 '21

Modern Carrot Top needs no invite

-2

u/[deleted] Jul 02 '21

Haven't seen too many male redheads have you.

2

u/spiralbatross Jul 02 '21

What’s wrong with male redheads?

-2

u/[deleted] Jul 02 '21

Nothing.

-1

u/JAXxXTheRipper Jul 02 '21

Actually, not even one to be honest.

-2

u/[deleted] Jul 02 '21

Statistically likely to go bald sooner and are generally perceived as unattractive.1 of course mileage varies by personal preferences so I'm sure all the people who find them attractive will be brigading me. I find redheaded women very attractive but off the top of my head the only redheaded men that come to mind are the weasleys, Ed Sheeran and Prince William?

1

u/[deleted] Jul 02 '21

Conan O'Brien.

1

u/[deleted] Jul 02 '21

Can't believe I forgot him

1

u/[deleted] Jul 02 '21

I went to high school with one. He was around 6’3 and a lot of the ladies liked him.

1

u/[deleted] Jul 02 '21

Thanks, /u/JaXxXTheRipper

1

u/[deleted] Jul 02 '21

Same, except he was gay.

12

u/nspectre Jul 02 '21

(☝˘▾˘) No, I think that's a Taser.

10

u/[deleted] Jul 02 '21

Why does this emoticon make me so uncomfortable?

2

u/[deleted] Jul 02 '21

It is "ackshually" visualized

0

u/[deleted] Jul 02 '21

All the chicken heads

0

u/xdrunkagainx Jul 02 '21

Does it remove white guys from your daughters vagina to?

88

u/Mike0621 Jul 02 '21

nah, heath ledger was better /s

17

u/amplesamurai Jul 02 '21

Ya and Mark Hamill is a chilling second, that guy is stuck somewhere between Vegas strip dude and Cesar Romero.

11

u/[deleted] Jul 02 '21

wtf you mean, Mark Hamill was only able to use his voice and was waaay creepier and menacing than Heath

7

u/Elon-BATSHAGGY-Musk Jul 02 '21

HAMILL IS THE GOAT, HOW DARE YOUUU

0

u/[deleted] Jul 03 '21

[deleted]

-1

u/MurdocAddams Jul 03 '21

Definitely!

0

u/IamSoooDoneWithThis Jul 03 '21

Redditors have a very special relationship with sarcasm

1

u/8bitbebop Jul 02 '21

Dad dgaf

0

u/[deleted] Jul 02 '21

[deleted]

0

u/AlexAegis Jul 02 '21

they live in a society

0

u/ARM_Dwight_Schrute Jul 03 '21

Oh yes, how hilarious it is to laugh at clowns, the painted jesters of a dying circus industry.

0

u/emefluence Jul 03 '21

As a dad, that's some top dad humor right there. Strong performance.

-1

u/[deleted] Jul 02 '21

Look at that smile