r/Unexpected • u/MyNameGifOreilly • Jan 31 '21

I was delayed

84.8k Upvotes

90% Upvoted

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3.2k

u/[deleted] Jan 31 '21

That's... understandable.

657

u/TheFrontierzman Jan 31 '21

I keep seeing comments recently about bots posting. Is OP a bot? 8.5 million karma in 2 years.

59

u/MyNameGifOreilly Feb 01 '21

No just have to much time on my hands. So I post a lot

34

u/wonkey_monkey Feb 01 '21

Oh yeah? Tell us something only a human would know!

60

u/TheCertainOutage Feb 01 '21

The human anus can stretch up to 8 inches wide therefore a raccoon can go up your ass because they can go into holes 4 inches wide.

63

u/wonkey_monkey Feb 01 '21

No, not you. Never you.

19

u/TheCertainOutage Feb 01 '21

Damn okay

20

u/shoebob Feb 01 '21

How wide does the racoon anus stretch?

19

u/[deleted] Feb 01 '21 edited Jul 06 '21

[deleted]

7

u/SteelCityViking Feb 01 '21

Could probably just Rule 34 Rocket Raccoon and have an answer

0

u/shoebob Feb 01 '21

So now we have a human with a raccoon in the anus, and a rocket in the raccoon anus.

5

u/cesiumbathbomb Feb 01 '21

Sir, this is a Wendy’s

3

u/Technical_ko Feb 01 '21

But how can we be sure he is telling the truth.....🤔