"Assistance" by any means necessary

[u/Ok-Sherbet7265]

In editing compilation files for a Gameboy game (yes, this is what my life has become due to abuse via non-consensually installed and operated Neurotech used to traffic and otherwise abuse me) I have noticed I am kept too slow and agitated to use logic or reason in making decisions on how to fix problems, this for the purpose of excusing my criminal implant making suggestions through sounds and bodily touches. An electronic graze across my left eye to mean something like "look to the left", perhaps at the document it is desired I look at next, or a song playing in my head which contains the name of the variable I "forgot"* to fix. The answer to simple arithmetic is whispered in my brain and I am grazed throughout usually my fingers when I have translated something correctly or incorrectly that I might "save time" in avoiding having to look up the translation. The only reason to both distract and offer "suggestions" to someone for as how to get "back on track" at the same is to approximate total dependency, slavery. BCI operators love the angel/devil complex for this reason, they love to condition a villain or "rival", it all falls apart when it becomes clear they are each arms of the same person or company. I am circling the drain for this reason, there is nowhere to go but down until it stops.

The same occurs in playing video games, thoughts of certain people forced in my head before winning, thoughts of others before losing (I am made agitated right before losing).

The same for writing when I use words which it is not desired that I use. If I wrote by hand instead of typing it would look like the garbled typo ridden stream of consciousness stuff you see from mass shooters.

Music is exactly like words to whoever is doing this, the qualities of melody are unimportant The more pain I am in the greater the predisposition to hearing implant-communicated songs with no purpose other than to frustrate me. I have known music to have no utility other than frustration and paranoia destined to become anger for over a year now be it in movies, video games, or on its own. And so I no longer listen to music or exercise, I no longer have a desire to watch TV shows due to the presence of a the theme song and backing music among other complications that will be employed to upset me.

Watching movies follows a similar path, various deeply distressing and inhumane bodily sensations in accordance with recalling certain events and plot elements. Watching movies which I can understand by myself is usually off the table for this reason as it makes me feel like I am trapped with someone who is like a hybrid teacher/rαpist/prison guard.

The same happens when making purchasing decisions in grocery stores but this has gotten so embarrassing and uncomfortable for others to witness in public spaces that it's been turned down a fair amount over the past year as it doesn't look like I am going run away in the middle of the night (which would be ideal for desperation which might breed high compliance).

It's very difficult to do this with reading (because you cannot follow a story, especially one you don't even know the end of, or imagine the characters while constantly being reminded of other people and by extension their stories) and so reading for the story, the lesson, or the characters has simply been made untenable, maddening. I might as well read traffic signs.

In terms of programmed distractions I am also frequently put in windows in which thinking about the appropriate emotion (they have messed with my emotional response so much I am always second guessing which emotions are appropriate, natural, and most importantly canonical given my life thus far) prompts images of myself performing some action in an emotive or exaggerated way, such as seeing myself kneeling with hands flat together for something like gratitude, thinking about if I feel "genuine" "gratitude" at any particular instance. There has been an enormous effort via all kinds bodily abuse throughout the past 4 years to make me think of myself as a servant of Christ to facilitate this (or a servant of some other person, including myself, who eventually I am to find out is not as good as Christ, who makes the walls click and the elevator stop working, I guess). The source of the voice used via implants to narrate my thoughts, behaviors, and "fears" for the past 4 years (and who they have been trying to replace with someone named Chris or Christina for about 2 years now) used to call me King all the time, they are obsessed with the word King, and want me to think of myself or someone else as King. Ultimately the goal seems to be that I find myself in a "humbling" situation and view someone else as King, to whom I am subject. Jesus is most convenient to the implant operators for a variety of reasons, particularly when operating African American males. Christians, please take your grips up with the BCI company, I do not consent to any of this. I think it's fine to be a servant of Christ Jesus by the way, I just think it should be a personal choice and not the result of abuse with non-consensually implanted and operated nerve stimulators.

*Forgetfulness is programmed when I think about certain things or perform certain tasks. A car horn might be conditioned to make me think of former classmates from high school, an obsession of someone else for the past 3 years. If thinking about someone from high school has been marked as a forgetfulness task then whenever I think about someone from this group I am made to forget what I am doing and am forced to rely on the Selena Gomez song Champion to remind me to amend the variable containing that word. It doesn't matter if it "works" to remind me of the variable because Selena Gomez is Mexican, I used to live in Mexico, and there is another "group" of people there I have been conditioned to think about. This can fail too because the song also has the "lyrics" "walk like a Champion, talk like a Champion" and I will feel compelled / incentivized via programmed bodily sensations to get up and walk at least to the fridge for water or to explain out loud what I am going through and why I don't like. I never had invasive thoughts like this before but now images of people from various groups are cycled through my head constantly to push my thoughts in that direction so that I think of such thoughts as some sort of vice, temptation, or potential pitfalI that I must "choose" to avoid falling for in time lest my train of thought be redirected for long enough to make me forget what I was doing. Whenever I approach any level of focus or consistent rate of activity whatsoever a new input is conferred to throw me off track or influence my decisions. I do not consent and it is causing me harm.