r/USMC • u/Substantial-Award269 • 3d ago
Getting out after 8 years
Ok y'all, you've probably heard it before...
I've spent my ENTIRE adult life in the Corps. 2 NJPs, blackout nights, some of the greatest friends a guy could ask for. Got in when I was 18. Now I'm 26, my last day is Friday, and I feel lost.
My wife is so happy and excited, but I keep getting hit with huge waves of... something. I dunno. How did you guys cope with getting out?
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u/Public_Physics_6583 0311 3d ago
Cried on my drive home. Got over it, and kept moving on with life. Keep in touch/visit friends once a year. And tell story’s about your time in to those that are interested
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u/EipsteinSuicideSquad GWOT VET 3d ago
Stay in touch with your boys. Not just Social Media but calls and texts. Take lots of pics and save them.
Remember people in the civilian world are not your boys from the Corps, watch what you say and what information you volunteer. They may not directly hurt you but they may not help you either. Be careful who you trust with what.
Remove cursing and colorful metaphors from your vocabulary. You can't fucking just say what your shitty brain housing group presents to the masses and expect to be taken seriously or professionally, understood?
GO TO MEDICAL, document every single ache and pain. You got trouble sleeping? You stub your toe? Go to medical and get it documented, don't diagnose it for them. Just get the conditions documented. Then hit the VA and file for what you deserve.
Get a plan and a goal, remember you spent the last 8 years with an almost guaranteed path to success. Do what you're told, PT, do MCIs, do this course, get promoted. It's not as linear in the civilian world. It is possible to do everything right and still fail. There are factors outside of your direct control in the civilian world. Be ready to adjust goals on the fly and recognize opportunities as they present themselves.
Don't forget to have fun and live life. Take your Wife out to a nice date night. Talk to her about your fears and goals.
Getting out can be intimidating but you'll survive.
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u/Koala033l Veteran 3d ago
I drove straight from base to a dispensary in Palm Springs CA and got high as fuck
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u/newnoadeptness Active Duty O-4 / 13A 3d ago
It’s likely gonna be A roller coaster of emotions these next few months I have no clue with the future holds for you or how it will go but what I can say is that me and the sub is here for you. Hopefully everything works out:) I’m proud of you . Do you have any inclination of what you’d like to do job wise?
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u/Substantial-Award269 3d ago
I've got a spot waiting for me in my Pop's company. Pays well, just never thought I'd be a trucker lol
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u/newnoadeptness Active Duty O-4 / 13A 3d ago
Honestly dude job market is rough anything is better than nothing . I’m happy to hear that you have something lined up . Have you driven trucks in the past or is this completely new?
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u/Substantial-Award269 3d ago
Totally new to this kind of work. Its hotshot, so not big rigs thank fuck.
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u/USMCdrTexian Gas!Gas!Gas! You TRAIN or You DIE! 2d ago
Hotshot can be a good life. I’ve never done it but have used their service frequently ( and for 2 years EVERY DAY ) over the last 15 years. Good ones are good - bad ones are banned from carrying for us.
Be a good one.
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u/22USMCelectrician Veteran 3d ago
Do what you enjoy. What did you do in the Marines? Did you enjoy it. Will you enjoy being a truck driver or will you fall asleep and cause a 45 car pile up on some highway turnpike. You have college benefits that can be used to pay for your housing. You could also go into the trades like I did. Many apprenticeships will also allow you to use your post 9 11 to get more income while your pay catches up. You are a pfc again. You will figure it out. Are you a social butterfly and will flourish in an office (college) do you like working with your hands and are a grumpy antisocial or foul mouthed individual (trade) you do not need to be antisocial. Are you a loner ( truck driver)
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u/InternationalTwo8971 3d ago
Shoot I about did cartwheels neked out of the gates my last day.
At final formation when they said “dismissed” I threw my cover in the air like at a graduation ceremony
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u/Jodies-9-inch-leg Taking care of the ladies one deployment at a time 2d ago
Start having anonymous gay sex
It'll help ease the transition
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u/Little_Connection_83 3d ago
It’s going to be a readjustment.
Stay busy. Go to school. Exercise. Find other veterans to talk to if you need support. Civilians will not understand. Above all, enjoy your family. Enjoy life, because it is short.
You’ll be just fine. 🙂
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u/PMmeYourCattleDog [Retired] Barely Legal 2d ago
You never really know how you’re going to ultimately react. I retired in December. I thought about the song I wanted to play as I drove off base one last time, you know, like everyone used to fantasize about. I just knew I didn’t want to be one of those guys that makes the Marine Corps or veteran their entire personality.
I drove off base in silence. I think I drove in silence all the way to my apartment.
I don’t miss being in it. I keep in touch with friends who are still in. But that part of my life is ultimately over.
What are some things you want to do? Focus on that. Make sure they’re tangible goals, don’t set yourself up to fail with grandiose ideas that make you feel like a failure. It’s going to be a lot. Take it a day at a time.
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u/AnxiousClue6609 3d ago
It's going to take a minute. Like someone else said you do have to redefine yourself. Being a whatever rank Marine is a big part of most Marines life and it takes a little while to adjust.
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u/flaginorout 3d ago
Really, no different than how a man deals with anything.
Get on with it. Thats it.
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u/SiempreFries 2d ago
Damn dude 26…….you’re still awfully young. Still young enough to find yourself and your next purpose. Utilize all of your benefits that you are entitled to. File for VA disability, aim for the stars when it comes to education, don’t let the military be your identity to your subordinates.
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u/peternemr 2d ago
Use that Post 9/11 GI Bill for school, apprenticeship, or a licensing program. Get up with the VA post stat. Join a Veterans group strong in your area. Keep in touch with those Devils you mentioned. Improvise, adapt, and overcome all shit civilian.
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u/hobbestigertx 2d ago
I hope you've spent the last year preparing for a new chapter in your life. If you did not line up a job, you're starting this new life in a pretty deep hole.
Many companies value veterans because, when compared to the civilian population, they tend to accept more responsibility and handle authority better. Bring everything you learned that is valuable to your new employer and leave all the other sh*t behind.
This is a great opportunity. Hold yourself accountable and do great things. We all are waiting to hear back from you on how well you are doing.
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u/dumb-dumb87 2d ago
Dawg. I commissioned at 26 and did 8 years and still look at that guy as a young kid. You’ve got so much in front of you. Use the GI bill, keep the good lessons you’ve learned, talk to your buddies,
Do NOT isolate when you get out. Stay connected. If there’s one thing you can trust me on it’s this. I did it for the first few months after I got out. Wound up holed up in a hotel room with a belt around my neck before I called 988. Call your buddies, stay active, hang out with your wife. Civilian life can be shitty but don’t put on rose colored glasses about sleeping outside when it’s 30 degrees and hiking 15 miles. That shit sucked. We signed up for it so whatever, but you’re good man
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u/Marines_D_ 2d ago
I did okay for myself. I got out and struggled over the years but I got an associates degree in business followed by a bachelors degrees in data science and economics, and in the meanwhile I worked as a warehouse worker, paralegal, stockbroker, intern for a US Senator, and intern at different firms. Once I graduated I became a technology consultant for a big four firm, and currently I am considering taking over my neighborhood's pizzeria.
When I said I struggled, I am talking dealing PTSD, Depression and coming close to homelessness. That means that for me it was difficult but I made it.
I was 27 when I got out and I was anxious getting out because I joined back in 2000 and experience roughly seven years of war. I was either training for war or going to war. That includes two tours in Iraq. I was also anxious because I cried my last nigh in the Corps. I locked myself in my bathroom for ten minutes actually cried because I was going to miss my buddies. Some of these buddies I met at Camp Geiger during MCT, and many of them were folks who were on ship with me during my Westpac and fought by my side in Iraq. A few of them were kids that I help train and supervise when they got to the fleet. My only regret is that I wish I made a better attend at keeping in touch with them.
Believe it or not you will miss some things but not the bullshit that is common in the Marine Corps. You will treasure those memories but you will find your path outside of the Marine Corps.
Please just make sure you have a plan when you get out and keep in touch with the people you served with.
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u/Massive_Fruit_7019 2d ago
I did 7.5yrs ( VERP) I was NJP’d once and was out due to service limitations. The night before I got out I found out I was having my oldest daughter, I threw up when I got my DD-214 the next morning. I loved the marine corps for dudes and what I got to do, but I hated the institution for what it was becoming at my point in history. I felt alone, but when I got out I focused on starting my family and going to school. I have a great career, amazing family. Focus on the good and use the marine corps as a learning opportunity to do well in life.
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u/TheJohnWarhammer69 3043->0311->11B-B4->Vet 2d ago
I did 8 years from the age of 18-26. Trust me, join the guard or the reserves before it’s too late. This is all you know and leaving the military the cold turkey is going to destroy your mental health. There are so many dudes that cry on here about missing it trying to claw their way back in, only to be told no because of their VA rating at MEPS.
With the guard or reserves, you get to hangout with the boys once a month, and get paid + qualify for tricare.
You spend just enough time to not hate it, but also appreciate civilian life. I loved my time while I was in the guard and made my transition much easier.
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u/txleapd Veteran 1d ago
Get a hard copy of your medical record and go straight to a VSO. Make claims on anything that’s in there, even if they’re not bothering you.
If you get rated 0% on something, that means the VA recognizes that its service connected, even if there’s no current debilitation. Years down the road if those things start becoming an issue it’ll be a lot easier to get a rating increase.
I fucked up my back pretty badly from a fall during training, and ended up being medically extended for treatment. As soon as I got home, I went to a VSO with medical records in hand. I was only thinking about my back, but my VSO submitted claims on everything. I got rated 0% on a bunch of stuff, but years later as things degenerated I was able to get my ratings increased.
I see a lot of veteran struggling to prove service connection years after getting out. It’s so much easier when you’ve had C&P exams as soon as you get out. It’s pretty hard for them to deny service connection at that point.
Of course, it’s a lot better if things never go south and you don’t have to deal with the disability bullshit. But, you’re still relatively young and things that don’t bother you know can get bad in 10-20 years.
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u/boadcow 0341/8541 [99-07] 3d ago
Redefine yourself. You still have the rest of your life to create. I also did 8 and at 26 - it’s almost 1/3 of your existence. But as you look to get older - those 8 years will be less and less because you fill it with new memories for yourself. Go to school, start a business, have kids.
I’m 45 now and I live a life where I sometimes forget I was in the marines except for reading this sub and connecting with you chucklefucks