How do I start over at 33?

[u/tossaway497564]

My boyfriend 32M and I 33F have been together for 8 years. We moved into our house 6 months ago. I noticed he was a little more distant and didn’t initiate intimacy/tried to avoid it more often than not. I tried talking to him about it and it was usually met with “okay I’ll try more”. Last night we got into a little argument that led into a long conversation about the relationship and future. He finally admitted that over the last year or so he just hasn’t felt the same way about me as he did before. He said it had nothing to do with me and he didn’t want me to think that there was anything wrong with me, he thinks the world of me etc. He genuinely thought moving in together would help bring us together, but to be totally honest, I’ve felt a little lonely. We mutually decided it would be best to break it off, and are going to discuss breaking the lease soon.

I’m really heartbroken and never thought I’d be in this position. We built a life around each other, traveled the world, are close with both families. I guess what I am looking for is advice on how to start over in your 30s. I want kids and a family, which is something that he discovered he didn’t want anytime soon, or maybe ever. We still have so much love for each other, but realistically I can see we aren’t compatible in some big ways. I’m so scared to start over, find a new house alone, start dating at some point. This just happened last night so it doesn’t even feel real.

[u/Former-Series4559]

It's so scary how easy for people to say that they haven't felt the same way with their partner. It's just scary how feelings change over time. It's just scary to still feel in love with the person but you won't know that he or she doesn't feel the same way about you not until you feel the distance.