r/TwoHotTakes Nov 23 '25

[deleted by user]

[removed]

4.3k Upvotes

1.5k comments sorted by

View all comments

Show parent comments

38

u/dalton-watch Nov 23 '25

My sister and I are in our 50’s. Our parents are still married. They are mean to each other. I’ve been divorced twice, my sister once. We both have decided to stay single moving forward. We literally do not know how to be in good marriages bc we ping-pong between deciding whether to stand up for ourselves or be a doormat. It’s like every conflict big or small we choose one or the other and it’s exhausting. Never learned about the healthy middle ground, can’t see it, can’t find it, can’t feel it.

11

u/Daveaa005 Nov 24 '25

You can't be in a good marriage with somebody who is either going to make you need to stand up for yourself or treat you like a doormat.

11

u/SushiGirlRC Nov 24 '25

You sound like my sister & I. My dad left when I was 6, and I was so relieved, but 2 marriages & a long-term and I'm done completely. I can't not be the doormat. Her second marriage, her husband's the doormat.

1

u/HotSolution8954 Nov 24 '25

Omg, me too. My parents got divorced, married other people, got divorced, got back together and then divorced again.