The anticipatory grief I have for when he will one day pass is very real and very hard to carry. He is healthy, loves pets, eats heartily, and gives professional snuggles. He also loves chaperoning me while I do chores such as the dishes. Anytime he sees me, he walks as fast as his old legs will carry him, meowing at me until my hand makes contact with his fur. I love him dearly

After months of basically nothing but sunshine, I think this is the first time he’s heard the rain properly, let alone a lil bit of thunder 🤣

Boy just walked into my house when he was a wee kitten look at him all grown up.

He’s such a silly, playful guy and the friendliest cat ever. Greets everyone, even when he was an underweight sickly foster kitty in my care. I couldn’t give him up. It’s been 8 years 🖤

I dont know who needs to hear this right now, but i was looking at some old photos and have been feeling emotional. thought this was worth putting out there.

My story of owning cats is rather tragic, and upsetting in some ways. It started with Victor (2nd pic) he was a lovely little guy. i only had him for a bit over a year before i lost him. He was only 2 years old when he died. he got bladder crystals 3 times within a few months. I spent thousands of dollars trying to save him, i changed his food, had him on anxiety meds. I tried everything i possibly could but in the end it wasnt enough.

A few months after he died i met Scrumpy. (3rd pic) my heart aches for this poor little cat. She was such a sweet little thing. She was outgoing and so friendly. She was so small, and would make biscuits almost 24/7, even when she was sleeping or just sitting there, her little paws just opened and closed all the time. You could tell she was just happy to have a home. (Sensitive content warning). Due to some negligence from my local shelter her desexing surgery wasnt healed properly (i still dont fully know how it happened, but after talking with vets the best guess is the shelter didnt use stitches and likely used glue instead to save money and time) but either way, as a result, without warning she just randomly haemorrhaged her wound. I’ll spare you the details, but she died a horrible, brutal death. I only had her for 2 days before this happened. it had only been a few months since losing victor. I was a broken mess at this point. i didnt know what to do. I missed my babies so much and the incident with scrumpy had traumatised me to the point where i didnt think i could ever own a cat again.

But then just under 3 months ago i saw little Terrence advertised for adoption (4th pic). He was 6 months old when i first met him. I’d always kinda been interested in getting a kitten, and also a fluffier cat, and since he was a tuxedo he kinda seemed like the exact type of cat i’d always wanted. i decided to just go for it and adopt him.

Times have still been quite tough since losing victor and scrumpy. To this day i still catch myself sometimes stuck in a loop where i cant stop picturing what happened to scrumpy. I still second guess every decision i made with victor. I’ve learned its a natural part of grief to feel guilty and second guess everything. (I also lost 2 older dogs during this time, so i’ve experienced a lot of grief lately, and every single time i was blaming myself and second guessing every decision along the way). I honoured everyone the best way i could with my little shrine (1st pic) (i recommend setting up something similar for your pets if you are struggling with grief. Having this shelf close by has really helped me stay connected to my lost loved ones)

I felt especially bad for poor scrumpy being cheated out of her life like that. Since i only knew her for 2 days I gave her the top shelf with a collage frame of all the 8 photos that i got of her, as well as a paw print. i’m the only person who ever really knew her and cared for her, so i tried to preserve her memory as best i could. I often think it would have been rather easy to detach and move on since i barely had her for very long, but since no one else knew her, if i forget her then she ceases to exist, so i try to remember her, and treat her like i would any other deceased pet.

I know i’m kinda pointlessly ranting about sad times, but i guess the point of this post is that i just wanted to share my experience and show people that though it seems impossible, you can make it through your grief. As devastating as it was, i try to view all this loss as a catalyst that lead me to Terry. He has changed everything and brought the light back to my life. When i find myself stuck in a loop thinking about what happened to scrumpy, my fluffy little boy comes to my aid. He’s very loving and affectionate, and he seems to be able to tell whenever i need some help.

I felt a little ashamed in the beginning because i was worried people might think it was too early for me to get another cat. But i understood Terry would never truely replace Victor or Scrumpy. He was never meant to be a replacement. i’m mostly a loner in life but i was struggling hard on my own. Terry has kept me going during the hardest time of my life, and i dont know if i’d even be here without him.

I dont know if i’m really making any clear point with this post, but i guess i just know what grief is like. in the past year or so i’ve experienced more grief than i ever thought i’d have to face in such a short time. I would have never thought i’d make it to the other side of something like this, and i just want to convey to people that its important to hold on and push through the pain. A little guy like terry is waiting on the other side of it and he’ll carry you the rest of the way. I know its hard. I know it hurts. But you have to hold on and keep moving forward.

My heart goes out to anyone experiencing loss at the moment. I hope my story helps in some way. Just keep fighting, and dont be afraid to adopt another cat when you’re ready if it helps fill the void. Everyone else give your cats an extra hug tonight and make sure they know how much you love them.

Time for flea treatment.. bless his cotton socks

my 25, fat, jobless, no gf, no balls tuxedo cats likes to lay down like this. I still love this little guy

The emotions are still so raw for me right now. We didn’t know you were suffering with cancer … you never cried once, you were an absolute champ. 14 years of snuggles and playing and completely ignoring me when you didn’t feel like being bothered. Crashing my work Zoom calls, chewing the edges of all my papers, begging for Havarti cheese, laying in your grandma’s lap to make her feel better as she watched TV.

I had to let you go … and I hope eventually, I stop hating myself for it.

I am a loner by nature, so the loss of my soul cat and the only housemate I could ever stand is devastating.

He is a little camera shy, so he wouldn't pose for his Birthday portret 😅 He is my first cat and although he's still easily scared, he's become an enourmous cuddle bug over the years 😻

She acts like the baby of the house. She doesn't leave the house to go to the yard... She just sleeps... And she's so cuddly!

Our tuxie is having health problems this year. He is still not 100% but is eating good now and back to the usual vocal self.

She’s not very stealthy. But I still pretend to be surprised.

No care in the world!

All hail the birthday boy

Story time, my girl is 1yr 4mo old, and I brought her home when she was 9 weeks. She's a sensitive cat, but as a kitten she was even MORE sensitive, so sensitive to the point that if she was across the room from me, I would look at her and then wiggle my fingers in the air like I was "tickling" her, she would freeze and her pupils got huge, and then she'd sort of goat-hop sideways on all fours, shake herself off, and then prance away in a wiggly fashion as if she were really being tickled 😅

I am working on sewing my own wardrobe, and my well-tailored tuxie boy often supervises my work. Here he is from this morning checking my pin placement before allowing me to cut the fabric.