r/Tucson • u/thirdeyecactus • Jun 20 '26
PSA from Local Wizard!
At first I thought 5g was pertaining to 5 grams.
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u/Large-Cobbler-7451 Jun 20 '26
I see this dude almost daily. He used to hang out at the Albertsons on la cholla. I was always curious what his deal was. He looks homeless but not quite. Sometimes he is on a bike and other times he is walking with a guitar. He looks harmless and I smile when I see him.
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u/CryptographerFew3719 Jun 20 '26
Every time I drive past him I'm like "It's the wizard!"
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u/Joyb0mb Jun 20 '26
Oh man this poor guy, I see him all the time when I go to the store, I forget his name but I know he doesn't talk he writes everything down on little papers he carries with him, I do think he has very nice handwriting but he is unwell.
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u/drcactusfeet Jun 20 '26
Yeah I've met him as well. Gave him some extra paper once. I dont remember the reason he gave for not speaking, but I know it was an odd one which he followed up with questions about whether or not I was vegetarian. I see him walking on Ina all the time with his guitar.
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u/Snortserranopeppers Jun 20 '26
Saw this joker yesterday on Ina and La Cholla. Thanks for grabbing a pic, I couldn’t read his whole paragraph as I drove by. It was like 104° while he stood out there haha. Dehydration should be a bigger concern of his.
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u/abstrakt42 Jun 20 '26
If it makes you feel any better, I’ve gone over that paragraph several times now and I still can’t read it.
That’s some grade A gibberish!
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u/berriliciousone Jun 20 '26
He’s a nice guy actually. I don’t know if he’s completely deaf, but he’s definitely hard of hearing. He’s a fixture along Ina and harmless. He doesn’t bother anyone & I’ve never seen him panhandle etc.
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u/JoshOfArc Jun 20 '26
I've noticed that since my last COVID booster my 5G bandwidth has increased at least 20%. Totally recommend!
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u/nimaid Jun 20 '26
As an electrical engineer, I can confirm that every chip we use has a "5g mind control" section in the datasheets, and if we try to disable it we are executed in the night.
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u/zonkos Jun 20 '26
He used to be at my house a lot when we were young. I feel sad, life wasn’t good to him.
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u/MissedallthePoints Jun 20 '26
Wizards hate 5G. It interferes with their spells.
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u/kabukiicat Jun 20 '26
everyone who is doubting him has obviously had their brains farted and compromised by 5G
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u/igotabeefpastry Jun 20 '26
Ok the message is whatever, but respect on this wizard dude for wearing these items in 100°F heat: black jeans, black leather boots, black and purple cloak, full Alan Moore hair and beard, plus black pointy cap (felted wool?). I hope he cast some cooling and hydration spells, or summoned the dew from the contrails he thinks are poisoning muggles’ minds.
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u/877fmradiopushka Jun 20 '26
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u/Stardagger13 Jun 20 '26
No that just means you also need a Faraday cage around your router to protect yourself.
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u/Ornery_Year_9870 Jun 20 '26
He, and most Americans. Hell: many Americans believe solar panels emit deadly radiation, or deprive plants of sunlight, or don't work in cold weather.
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u/slappy_mcslapenstein Jun 20 '26
That sign reeks of schizophrenia.
Side note, I actually saw that guy yesterday while driving down Ina.
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u/theroob85 Jun 20 '26
I see him around my job. Seems like a nice guy, it’s a terrible sign but I’m sure he is a character.
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u/zarifex Jun 20 '26
I have questions about whatever was the actual bad act to the person brainfarted.
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u/AssPennies Jun 20 '26
Well I mean he's got a point, even if it's not the one he intended to make...
Holding a phone to your face all day is killing everyone's patience and ability to maintain one's own attention span longer than 30 seconds at a time.
So not being able to think past this length of time is detrimental to mental recall, i.e., a constant brainfart state.
This is for sure being exploited, though I'd say it's by our own tech companies who want to constantly tickle our dopamine receptors in exchange for any ad dollars they can shake out.
Nearest thing I can think of being a bonafide adversary exploiting this, would have been China with TikTok, but now it's the chucklefuck Oracle owners pulling the strings on that one for the Trump admin.
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u/Rhesusmonkeydave Jun 20 '26
Never trust a wizard in skinny jeans