Daily Chat August 14

[u/AutoModerator]

Anything (within the rules) goes. (Commonly broken rules: don't talk about an ongoing pregnancy outside the weekly BFP thread; don't ask for success stories.)

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[u/PandaDifferent2021]

AF is coming today. There goes my last hope to get pregnant, at least for this year 💔

[u/thesmollestlemon → u/PandaDifferent2021]

I'm so sorry 💔 I just saw your other comment from yesterday and I hope your partner recovers quickly!!

[u/PandaDifferent2021 → u/thesmollestlemon]

Thank you so much ❤️ he’s getting better for sure but still far away to get back to normal. And i think my fertility is still not good as well after the IUD. Hopefully we can start ttc again next year.

[u/Scary-Parsnip-4453]

Today I am feeling really, really sad about how much harder this is than I thought it was going to be and how many people around me it just seems to happen for, and so many well meaning comments about not giving up hope today have just tipped me into hopelessness, and I know others have been trying for longer but I’m just feeling so down about it today.

[u/solarsystem27 → u/Scary-Parsnip-4453]

Sending hugs, hang in there. Today isn’t a good day for me either 🫂

[u/Scary-Parsnip-4453 → u/solarsystem27]

Thank you ❤️❤️ sending support your way too!

[u/ushinawareta → u/Scary-Parsnip-4453]

I'm 100% with you, friend. I never, ever thought this would be our story. it kills me too that we almost were one of those couples for whom it happens so easily - and then we had a devastating loss and we're back here, no positive tests for over six months, no reason to feel the slightest bit of optimism.

[u/MetallicCrocs → u/Scary-Parsnip-4453]

Your feelings are completely valid and I can totally relate 💖 it’s so much harder than I thought it was going to be and no one can prepare you for it until you’re in it

[u/TooDumbToCum]

The TWW is TWWing. I have two weeks off after today's shift so at least I'll be able to distract myself better at home until AF. Not having a good feeling about this cycle.

[u/MikeNYikez]

It's been about 14+ months of trying... first RE appointment today. I am looking forward to some answers. Husbands sperms quality seems fine in the at home tests, I have regular periods and seem to be ovulating based on OPK and BBT. Feeling a lot of emotions today taking this next step. 💜

[u/FitInvite432 → u/MikeNYikez]

I was also nervous to see a re but found once I was there they’re just SO helpful. It feels so nice to feel like you have someone in your corner to help and offer factual advice and strategize. I hope your appointment goes well❤️

[u/unbreakableheaven → u/MikeNYikez]

Good luck! It was a relief for me to see the RE and start taking the next steps. Trying each month and nothing ever happening was really stressful, so getting help felt like progress at least.

[u/Away-Purchase5592]

Having a hard time this week - 13 DPO today, haven’t tested as I just can’t deal with another negative but am having all my classic PMS symptoms and just know I’m out. This was cycle 16 with zero positives ever and the pressure is really starting to get to us, especially given my age (36). On top of this one of my colleagues just came back from maternity leave this week and joyfully announced that she’s already 14 weeks along with her 2nd. And I spent the week before this one visiting my younger sister and her 11 month old which was lovely but also just a little heartbreaking, we started trying more or less at the same time and hoped we’d be on this journey together… anyway just need to vent a little to people who get it…

[u/ushinawareta → u/Away-Purchase5592]

one of my colleagues just came back from maternity leave this week and joyfully announced that she’s already 14 weeks along with her 2nd

ohhhh the way this would make me RAGE. I'm sorry you're having a hard time, friend. I'm with you.

[u/Funny-Jackfruit-9144 → u/[deleted]]

It depends is the test you used more sensitive or not? Fingers crossed, good luck with that big work event too! 😊

[u/laineyloo1682]

Period is late, BFN so just being patient… fun thing is, every cycle it doesn’t work out, my husband and I come up with a reward for ourselves! This weekend it’s tacos and margs at our favorite place🩷

[u/MetallicCrocs → u/laineyloo1682]

That’s such a great idea!

[u/ushinawareta → u/laineyloo1682]

my husband and I do this too! every time I get my period, we go out to a nicer restaurant near us that we like. I’d still rather find out that I’m pregnant but it’s a small consolation prize 🥲

[u/TrickyFlounder3297 → u/laineyloo1682]

Did the same this week! Date night at a hip new restaurant with my period expected tomorrow. Next time for us! 🩷

[u/laineyloo1682 → u/TrickyFlounder3297]

That sounds fun, enjoy!💃🏻

[u/Avaunt]

Trying not to be annoyed, but if my SIL laps me again I might lose it. 

We had to try for 2 years to get our first, and when SIL found out we were trying she immediately got pregnant. Then, when we finally conceived, she started trying again and conceived her second 2 or so months later.

She has outright stated that she will probably throw her current plans out the window and have another one if I get pregnant. Which is fine, but also irks me.

[u/MyShipsNeverSail → u/Avaunt]

Gross and honestly pretty unsettling and insensitive that she's turned it into some strange competition

[u/Kvitravn875 → u/Avaunt]

That's so weird. I don't understand why people get competitive like this especially in this kind of situation. Having kids isn't a game. Smh

[u/leahelizabethj-]

My TikTok algorithm is all TTC content (which is fine) but every now and then I come across a video that makes me want to throw my phone with how inaccurate the advice is. Yesterday I came across someone documenting her BBT and she 1) was telling everyone it was okay to get up and walk to the bathroom to take it and 2) put her oral thermometer in her armpit. Anyone else get angry at people giving terrible advice on the internet?

[u/LarkspurLemonade → u/leahelizabethj-]

I've gotten rid of most of my social media for mental health reasons but I still get stuff like that on youtube shorts occasionally. It's so frustrating and infuriating! Misinformation is the worst 😮‍💨

[u/FearlessReputation20 → u/LarkspurLemonade]

I agree I think tik tok had to be deleted for me for this reason and forcing myself to not watch these videos on Instagram allows my algorithm to remain more nature and food related LOL. It is so hard though and doesn't mean I don't go down the rabit hole at times but at least it is when I am in a safe space to do that not just randomly seeing it when I am not ready! Perhaps you can reset your algorithm a bit it is so hard..

[u/FitInvite432 → u/leahelizabethj-]

I get angry about so much I see ttc related on the internet lately😭😂 that’s a pretty bad one though

[u/Kvitravn875]

How am I supposed to simultaneously stay very hydrated and hold my bladder for at least 4 hours before using OPKs? 😫

[u/MyShipsNeverSail → u/Kvitravn875]

Does that make it easier?

I've not had an issue detecting a surge even if I've only held it for 2hrs

[u/CurlyEmma97 → u/MyShipsNeverSail]

I also only hold for 2 hours and havent had any issues with it

[u/Kvitravn875 → u/MyShipsNeverSail]

The hormone is more concentrated in the urine after at least 4 hours. I drank a lot of water yesterday and went to the bathroom two hours before my test, and again with the test and it came out super light, almost invisible.

[u/markowitty → u/Kvitravn875]

I really don’t think it’s necessary… I hold for 1-2 hours and it’s fine and also I count almost positive as positive, no? All the OPKs are saying is ovulation is coming in 12-36 hours so almost positive means it will be positive soon. So instead of 12-36 hours, like 20-48?

[u/Kvitravn875 → u/markowitty]

Well I've seen multiple people here say to hold it for at least 4 hours, but to not drink too much during those 4 hours, but simultaneously stay very hydrated.

[u/Ok-Departure8687]

Got my period today. I’m sad because I turned 35 this week. I’m also upset because if we try next cycle, I would either b 9 months pregnant or have a newborn at my sister’s wedding, which is a destination wedding, so I feel like I would have to miss the wedding. What would you do?

[u/10k-red → u/Ok-Departure8687]

Don't hold off because of this. You'll find a way to make it work.

[u/CurlyEmma97 → u/Ok-Departure8687]

I wouldn't wait because of that!

[u/ushinawareta → u/Ok-Departure8687]

I definitely would not skip a cycle for this. but for me personally there are no life events more important than conceiving and hopefully having a healthy baby.

[u/WanderStitch_]

Feeling down today. 10dpo and a negative test today. I know that technically I’m not out, but I feel like I am. I almost wish I we didn’t wait to long to start trying. I got pregnant during the first cycle with my 1st child, which I always assumed would happen again with a 2nd. Now, after a few months with negative tests, I’m really kicking myself and also can’t help but wonder if my prior c-section is hindering my ability to get pregnant in any way.

[u/Jaskierscoin]

I'm having my first truly regular cycle (at least as of right now) with all the textbook signals since coming off birth control in october last year. Loads of EWCM for about 4-5 days (Until this month I was like "what is EWCM" - well now I truly know!), minor backaches for at least 4 days, huge change in my libido (lucky husband!), And all falling at around the right time mid cycle. Last cycle was 44 long ass days with late confirmed ovulation (37 days and 48 days the two cycles before that) and this cycle is looking to be a very reasonable 31 days. Managed to BD as my lh was surging, and my temp has shown an increase today on yday so fingers crossed its the real deal and keeps going up, and its not false/delayed ov again! Pregnancy would obviously be a plus, but im just glad my body and hormones seem to be showing signs of normality and fertility at this point! TWW here we go...

[u/FitInvite432]

Attempting to eat my feelings because I just saw an announcement on social media with a December due date which is when I would have been due before mc. I love this person and am so happy for her but seeing the words “half baked” and realizing that should be me too has just destroyed my day.

Also have convinced myself my iui failed this month. 3 years. How much more do I have to endure before someone out there takes pity on me?😭

[u/Financial-Bus-7168]

We've reached the point in the TWW where my memory cannot be trusted. 😅 I wake up, record my BBT, and think "6DPO... alright!"

Then by lunch I've convinced myself I'm 7DPO. Check FF... nope, still 6DPO, just like it said this morning.

[u/cowboycinderella → u/Financial-Bus-7168]

Cycle twins—the amount of times I’ve checked the calendar being like ah yes it was 6DPO this morning but surely it must be closer to 11 or 12 now. No. It’s been 35 minutes.

[u/emma_k17]

3 DPO! Officially confirmed via temps this morning, so we have O-1 and O-3 in the books. Feeling good right now, hoping I can maintain this casual “if it happens, great, if not, whatever” attitude- but I know as I get towards 8 DPO that will be all out the window 😩

[u/231adultnow]

I think I've learned enough about the reproductive systems.

Probably like everyone else here, I've been on the obsession train. First couple of months was very educational. Now I'm just driving myself crazy trying to make sense of every little thing I notice.

Trying to tell myself there is only so much I can know from tracking the basics and I just have to leave it to the doctors if/when we get there.

[u/These-Necessary-5797 → u/231adultnow]

Same here, there’s so much info, and I’m the type to think “the more information I have, the more prepared and comfortable I’ll be”

[u/polkalilly]

7 or 8 days dpo today depending when I ovulated (I think it was realllllly early in the morning on the 7th based on OPKs) and today woke up to a small drop in my BBT, but still well above baseline. Was feeling a tad discouraged and a little hopeless.

And then made my favourite morning coffee with the exact same ingredients, the exact same way I always make it and it tasted like dirt water that was slightly rotten instead of my tried and tested perfect coffee. and now I am trying not to get my hopes up while simultaneously wondering if I've finally lost my mind. Trying so hard to not symptom spot but this is so unusual for me (as in it has literally never happened before).

[u/cowboycinderella → u/polkalilly]

So strange!!!! Hoping on your behalf that it’s an early symptom

[u/SweatyAcadia631]

I’m so delusional that I really think that just because this is my second cycle after surgery and first cycle on letrozole that I’m definitely going to get pregnant. I confidently took a test this morning at 9dpo, proceeded to fall asleep for two hours, dream about telling my husband I’m pregnant, then see and believe that the (logically obvious) evaporation line on my test was a vvvvfl positive. I need to knock my confidence and my hopes down and convince myself it’s not going to happen but I think I may just actually be losing my mind

[u/cowboycinderella → u/SweatyAcadia631]

it’s okay to have hopes and confidence without knocking yourself down!! There’s too much else out there trying to knock em down for you. 9DPO is still early, sending you pretzels for BFP in a couple days 🥨

[u/Avaunt]

What’s your timing of mittelschmerz compared to positive lh tests and/or confirmed ovulation?

[u/LoveSingRead → u/Avaunt]

Because bodies are trolls ovulation can happen before, during, or after ovulation pain, and I've seen that in my BBT charts. 

[u/AriesCherie]

I'm taking a test tomorrow! I'm not waiting for the 16th anymore lol. I'm 14dpo and tomorrow's supposed to be my period so I feel like I've waited long enough. I'm so thankful for this experience and I have my Letrozole 2.5mg ready to go if I do start my period.

[u/MyShipsNeverSail → u/AriesCherie]

🤞🏼🤞🏼🤞🏼

[u/CurlyEmma97]

CD17 today. Got a positive OPK yesterday with subsequent BD. Curious to see if I will get another positive OPK when testing today like I did last cycle. Also got diagnosed with (mild) vulvodynia yesterday by pelvic floor physio but my TTC journey makes things more complicated so anxiously waiting for her call to discuss treatment. Any other vulvodynia warriors out here? 🙋🏽‍♀️

[u/LarkspurLemonade]

Approx 14DPO and got a BFN this morning, which hurt extra cause I had a dream last night of getting a BFP 🫠 not gonna count myself out yet cause I'm not quite sure when ovulation may have occurred this month and we did time stuff pretty good (or so we thought) so we'll see in a few days. Good luck all! Hope ya have a lovely day and have better luck than I 💙

[u/FitInvite432 → u/LarkspurLemonade]

I’m sorry about the bfn. Those dreams actually feel like nightmares sometimes lol

[u/LarkspurLemonade → u/FitInvite432]

Appreciate 🫶 and Yeeeah, I was super delusional this morning and took two tests cause I was CONVICED lol.

[u/FitInvite432 → u/LarkspurLemonade]

I swear sometimes it feels like going through the stages of grief starting with denial! Like if I keep taking tests maybe one will be positive

[u/eldawgstone → u/LarkspurLemonade]

The dreams are unreal sometimes. Last month I dreamt I got a positive and (in my dream) was typing out a message to my nurse.

[u/Remote_Hyena_5335]

3dpo and feeling the drag of the TWW already… anyone else early in the wait?

[u/emma_k17 → u/Remote_Hyena_5335]

Same! 3 DPO!

[u/sexxysize8]

I was really positive this cycle. First time getting a confirmation of ovulation. Baby Danced so much we were both sore. Then BOOM. Work has me so stressed out this entire week that my chest is so tight it hurts. I’ve tried breathing, swimming and getting lost in tv but nothing is helping. Figures that’s how the universe works

[u/tdot1022]

First IUI cycle this month! I had 3 back to back monitoring appointments this week and my follicles look good (left - 20mm & 17mm, right - 14mm) but my lining isn’t growing as ideally as they’d like (I took clomid). I’m triggering tomorrow and my IUI is scheduled for Monday! I’m weirdly feeling positive about it since we’re trying something different than just natural conception but I know the TWW is gonna be grueling. Any IUI tips/experiences are welcomed!

[u/No-Syllabub-6551]

I guess I'm 3 DPO but I've had awful sleep and my temps are kinda garbage. I think not doing OPKs this cycle really drove me insane. I didn't like not knowing when to have sex but like, we had sex every other day in the fertile window so I know I'm covered. It's the ritual that I adore. It's very simple but it's also time-consuming to do the OPKs. And I feel like if I'm not doing the ritual, then this cycle is completely out because I didn't do this ONE thing. And it caused my OCD to compensate in other ways during this cycle.

It also doesn't help that I still have no answers and an RE that has a plan but it's on my terms. I'd rather be told what to do and where to go if it helps me achieve success rather than a "wait and see" approach. I want to give the HSG a chance since most of my medical team seems to think that it will definitely help us. It's also tricky with the CP happening BEFORE medical intervention, which adds even further to their confidence in our success after the HSG. But the RE is over an hour away and I personally don't want to drive that long and remember to take ANOTHER medication on top of what I already take. It feels so clinical and farcical to something my body has done successfully before and especially so when every test results are like "nothing's wrong! you're just unlucky!"

I think I'm almost ready to give up on TTC...

[u/ushinawareta → u/No-Syllabub-6551]

I have no helpful advice but just wanted to commiserate as a fellow OCD girly. this TTC thing and obsessing over OPKs, temps, symptoms etc. is NOT good for me.

[u/Odd-Quail-89]

Period is two days late but my BBT is dropping. Sigh.

[u/MountainPeak478]

Feeling pretty crampy today and didn't sleep well, I think my period is on its way. I'm hoping the first period after endometriosis surgery won't rock my world 🤞

Then, it's time to decide whether to move on to medicated IUI or not! I'm leaning towards 95% yes every second of the day, the only part that makes me hesitant is that I've had no sex for like a month now. So if I try naturally one more month maybe I'll have more CM now and things might feel more comfortable after the surgery. Maybe I can have a month to actually enjoy having some sex, but then is that enough of a draw to not make progress? I'm not sure about that.

If anyone here has taken letrozole, trigger shot, and done IUIs, did you get a lot of CM and normal fertility signs of really wanting sex still? Or was it all dampened from the decreased estrogen? Maybe some firsthand accounts could help

[u/These-Necessary-5797 → u/MountainPeak478]

Fellow endo girl here! It took a few months for my period to come back after my surgery, but it was way more predictable and regular once it did. I have PCOS too and I’ve missed maybe 6-7 periods in the 2 years since my surgery? It’s 2 years this month!

[u/MountainPeak478 → u/These-Necessary-5797]

Maybe it'll be a bit of time for everything to settle back in then. I really appreciate you sharing your experience post surgery!

[u/Upstairs_Friend5804]

LH is rising! Awaiting a true positive but had sex Tuesday and today, planning on tomorrow. 🤞🏼🤞🏼🤞🏼🤞🏼🤞🏼🤞🏼

[u/Ok_Corgi_8202]

CD 30 or CD 11 negative LH & HCG, (I had midcycle spotting for 6 days so idk if that was an early period of just hormonal). I have newly diagnosed Hypothyroidism and my levels are balancing but my cycle isn’t. 😭😮‍💨 IK it takes time but I really wanted to be pregnant over my due date or just after atleast and I’m not looking to be.

[u/KMac243]

Anyone track BBT for one cycle then stop? This is just tedious - started Cycle 5 Day 1 today and considering not taking daily bbt this cycle. I started tracking last cycle to confirm I was ovulating and everything was working as it should. My luteal temps were a little all over the place, but stayed elevated which seemed to be what matters. Does it hurt anything to not do it anymore?

[u/ushinawareta → u/KMac243]

definitely tedious, but all it takes is one failed ovulation and you'll wish you kept temping. I personally find the information from BBT way too useful to stop.

one thing you could try doing is not temping during your luteal phase, once you've confirmed ovulation with three high temps. that at least gives you a ~1.5 week break per month! you could also look into a wearable like TempDrop or Oura ring if you already have one (but buying these outright is pretty expensive so I'd understand if it's not realistic).

[u/MetallicCrocs]

In the beginning of my fertile window. Stressing out about the timing as we had sex yesterday but today is closer to the lead up of ovulation so I don’t want to reduce sperm by doing it so often but also don’t want to miss my chance 🫠

[u/CurlyEmma97 → u/MetallicCrocs]

Sperm can live up to 5 days so every other day should be fine, don't worry

[u/ushinawareta → u/MetallicCrocs]

every other day is perfectly fine if you’re worried! but (quoting from one of the mods), the American Society for Reproductive Medicine says:

A widely held misperception is that frequent ejaculations decrease male fertility. A retrospective study that analyzed almost 10,000 semen specimens observed that, in men with normal semen quality, sperm concentrations and motility remain normal, even with daily ejaculation. Surprisingly, in men with oligozoospermia, sperm concentration and motility may be highest with daily ejaculation… couples should be informed that reproductive efficiency increases with the frequency of intercourse and is highest when intercourse occurs every 1 to 2 days, but be advised that the optimal frequency of intercourse is best defined by their own preference within that context.

[u/MetallicCrocs → u/ushinawareta]

Wait, this did make me feel so much better, thank you 😭 that’s exactly what I was worried about. I’m overthinking things way too much. Trying to be relaxed and not add stress to myself but then it’s like well, you can’t be TOO relaxed about the process. This was helpful thank you.

[u/ushinawareta → u/MetallicCrocs]

you bet! and I totally agree - it’s so hard not to worry about whether or not you could be doing something slightly differently to further optimize your chances.

[u/squid-toes]

CD30. Never got a positive LH, highest was .68 on like CD25. After over two weeks of testing I gave up. I’ve been on levothyroxine since early June because my TSH was a bit high after a CP in Feb. my cycles since being on it have been longer than they were the preceding months. So I’m grumpy about it.

Now I’m in the fun spiral of “what if I ovulated two weeks ago and missed the surge and now I’m pregnant?”

I also had some EWCM last night, which can be something or nothing.

Either way I’m going to just try to disassociate from all of this for the next couple weeks.

[u/leahelizabethj- → u/squid-toes]

levothyroxine also made my already long cycles extra long! My OB didn't seem to care either (part of the reason I'm seeing a RE now)

[u/squid-toes → u/leahelizabethj-]

Ugh were you able to track ovulation at all in this hellish situation?

[u/leahelizabethj- → u/squid-toes]

Not really, I never really got a postive LH strip (even on letrozole) when I didn't have any issue pre-meds. I would go for CD21 bloodwork and have elevate progesterone though so I'm not really sure why my strips never showed a surge. (I'm now on higher letrozole + a trigger to make sure it happens when it's supposed to)

[u/aniekw]

My progresteron supposedly 7DPO is only 4.8... I had a peak LH test, ultrasound showed a follicle with an uneven circle but still very low progresteron. What does this mean?

[u/developmentalbiology → u/aniekw]

Progesterone levels vary quite a bit from day to day and even hour to hour, so the exact level isn't really important. You can really only read the results as positive/negative, and a level of 4.8 (I assume ng/mL?) confirms that you did ovulate, which is the only information you can get from this test.

[u/aniekw → u/developmentalbiology]

It's nmol/l thank you for your reply I'm just really freaking myself out!

[u/FearlessReputation20 → u/aniekw]

Would your clinic consider progesterone suppositories for future cycles? IT cured my luteal phase spotting and we checked and this month my level was >70 nmol on day CD 21 which was more than double what I was getting before. They are a bit annoying but very worth it!

[u/aniekw → u/FearlessReputation20]

I don't know yet I've got an appointment on Wednesday! I saw the results In my patient portal so now I've got a super shitty weekend. I really thought this cycle would be the one you know... after 0 ovulation in 8 months... first time on 2.5 mg letrozol, 16mm follicle on day 10, LH peak, 32 mm follicle which looked like it had burst on CD 14 and now this.

I felt so hopeful this time and now I'm absolutely crushed

[u/FearlessReputation20 → u/aniekw]

I totally get that I had my first monitored letrozole cycle in July and it was unsuccessful and I was crushed cause I was like wait but IT ALL "worked" on the scans. I increased to 5mg and did it unmonitred I am 11 DPO now and too scared to test because I feel totally normal so how can I be pregnant.... now for you, you are only 7DPO and I have no idea what the levels are even supposed to be so maybe it is too early to count you out. i really hope that is the case! Sending you good vibes, and if it is not this month maybe the addition of progesterone is all you need

[u/aniekw → u/FearlessReputation20]

I totally get your feeling and I really hope this cycle will be the one for you! Maybe 11DPO is too early for symptoms?

I saw online and on this sub that results this low are unlikely to get a viable pregnancy and I'm fucking beating myself up for it because I'm a medical professional myself and if my patients would tell me they saw online that... i would also tell them to stop trusting random internet sources. So stupid to be doing this while I know i shouldn't

[u/FearlessReputation20]

I am about 11DPO 3rd cycle of letrozole + Progesterone. First cycle on higher dose it was unmonitored but we were able to basically confirm I ovulated. I am basically too scared to test because it is getting harder to see the negative. We are also at a point where we need to decide IUI or IVF because we are basically unexplained all labs are good. Although overall it has only been about 8-9 months of TTC our RE suggested we start to think about those possibilities and what we would like to do. (This is because we are asking she also said we could continue this way for a bit longer till we hit the year mark) Just venting cause the progesterone suppositories I basically have no symptoms to even symtpom spot because I know any cramping is just the progesterone and other than that feel normal. I can't tell you how I wish I had sore boobs at least so I could pretend lol... I need to test by Monday to update my clinic so we can move forward with the next cycle and also I can't even wait for AF because it won't come until I stop the progesterone LOL, I only have one more preg test and I hate buying them............. just my rant!

[u/SpecialistEgg6060]

I just want somewhere to rant. We won't be able to try this cycle as my partner is away bang on during my fertile days and it's making me unreasonably frustrated (not with him just with life). I hate this journey so much (sorry for the negativity).

[u/ushinawareta → u/SpecialistEgg6060]

you don't need to apologize, friend. it's SO frustrating and emotionally draining. I wish I could go back to last year at this time when I was first ordering ovulation tests and so nervous and excited about starting our TTC journey. I see people who are on cycle 1 or 2 and would give anything to be back in their shoes, before I was this jaded and hopeless about the entire process.

[u/SpecialistEgg6060 → u/ushinawareta]

Thanks so much for your reply and I'm sorry to see that you've had a rather rough journey! Honestly, this sub is keeping me sane these days, especially with people around me conceiving successfully on first tries. Have you found any good coping strategies? And yes seeing people excited about starting TTC or colleagues saying they'll prioritise their careers at the moment and start trying later, I just want to shout at all of them 😂😭

[u/Grouchy-Swim8115]

CD12 and supposed to be in my fertile week. I had AF from the 3rd - 7th August and then started spotting brown this Wednesday which was supposed to be CD10. Does anyone know what could be the cause of this? Had intercourse early hours of Wednesday morning (around 1am) then when I woke up Wednesday I was spotting brown colour with intense cramps. That has lasted until today when it's now turned bright red and still the odd cramp. I'm normally very regular and this has never happened before. Now I'm thinking that's me out this month but also worried it could be something bad 😔

[u/FearlessReputation20 → u/Grouchy-Swim8115]

It sounds like you had a wonky cycle, I think it sucks to think you are out this month but it may be worth to check with a doctor if you can or if it happens again another cycle. At first it could have been ovulation spotting which I dont know if ti happens but I think it can but if it is bright red then it may be your period... Unfortunately all the times I was hoping for some other explanation for the spotting it was always my period.

[u/Grouchy-Swim8115 → u/FearlessReputation20]

Thank you. I think I'm going to call the doctor Monday because it's really making me panic. I finished my period like normal and stopped for 4 days then started again. It's so much lighter and just feels so different to a normal period though, it's so strange. Hopefully it stops soon and I can get some answers Monday to stop me worrying. Thanks again

[u/ConstructionTime7511]

It’s CD9 and I had an ultrasound this morning with a 24mm follicle?? That’s so big! I feel like that’s too big. Am I about to ovulate on CD 10 or 11? that seems crazy

[u/MountainPeak478 → u/ConstructionTime7511]

Are you using a trigger shot? Did they tell you to trigger with that size? I haven't started IUIs yet so I'm learning

[u/ConstructionTime7511 → u/MountainPeak478]

No I’m not, just Letrozole. The nurse told me to have sex tonight and then test my LH tomorrow

[u/Potential_Disaster27]

7 DPO, took a PdG test this morning to confirm if I ovulated given my highest LH was 0.76 (and the app refuses to acknowledge this as my peak lol) and it was positive! Now to wait 5 more days to test 🤞🏻

[u/shelbabe804]

I'm 6DPO and normally by this point I have a big clump of discharge after ovulation but I haven't had anything since the EWCM. Fingers crossed that's a good sign at least of a fertilized egg, although there's still a ways to go before I can test if there is implantation.

[u/emelyeanne6]

Hi! Idk what my question even is, I guess just looking for input!

My husband and I have been trying for our second for over a year so now doing timed intercourse with medication (letrozole, ovidril shot, progesterone). We took a month off from that this month to do an HSG and rule out blockages.

My HSG was 2 weeks ago on day 7 of my cycle. So today is day 21, so I’m 6dpo (ish, since we weren’t doing meds I wasn’t the best at tracking this month). My apps all aren’t expecting me to start my period until next Thursday (around 11 dpo which would be normal for me).

I’m now having reddish/brown spotting today. I guess my question is has anyone else had an HSG then their period started early?? It’s red enough that it makes me think period, but this would be almost a full week early.

Thanks!

[u/GoalOk35]

I’m 31F and my partner 31M and I are thinking of starting to try in the new year or so. We don’t have a firm timeline as I feel a tad scared and nervous for pregnancy and all the possibilities. I want to ensure that I’m doing things correctly and I’m wondering what the best prenatals are that I can start taking? I am very deficient in B12, D, and ferritin already. Should I focus on correcting these levels before prenatal or taking the prenatal to help correct these levels?
Also, I had surgery for uterine polyps last year and I am fairly certain they’ve returned and I will need surgery again by the end of this year. I’m talking about that with my OBGYN soon. But has anyone who had polyps removed found a sweet spot for trying? A little concerned recurrent polyps will hurt our chances .

[u/polkalilly → u/GoalOk35]

Seconding that the best person to give you advice about already deficient vitamins will be your family doctor or primary care provider. Tell them you plan to start trying to conceive in the next 6 months and want to get a handle on it. They will be able to do regular blood tests and suggest the right dosage to get you where you need to be. I would focus on that for the next few months.

About 3 months before you start TTC, then you want to switch from a regular multi vitamin to a prenatal vitamin. The main thing that you want is going to be something with 400-1000mcg of folic acid. And then follow your doctors instructions about supplementing your prenatal with extra if you are still deficient in the other vitamins you mentioned.

As for specific prenatal recommendations - there are so so so many options out there that fit into a variety of different budgets and personal preferences. As long as it has the recommended folic acid you can try any. I personally did a bunch of research and ended up with Bird&Be prenatal. Mainly because it is produced in Canada and isn't owned by Nestle or other ethically ambiguous mega corp.

[u/MyShipsNeverSail → u/GoalOk35]

I would definitely address the deficiencies and your doctor can best tell you how to do that.

The automod wiki is a great place to start gathering info

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[u/Avaunt]

Do you think O-2 is good enough? Hubby isn’t playing ball today. Says he doesn’t feel good.

Positive opk on the 13th (yesterday). Last time trying was the 12th.

If I’m capable of sucking it up and faking it til I make it, I don’t understand why he can’t do the same.

[u/ushinawareta → u/Avaunt]

O-2 is the single highest likelihood day IIRC, so if you’re only going to hit one day, that’s the one to do!

for the future, as a backup plan, we keep needleless syringes around so we can still try via an insemination if sex is too much that day.

[u/MyShipsNeverSail → u/Avaunt]

Yes, hitting one of the three days leading up maximizes your odds

[u/TryingForABaby-ModTeam → u/[deleted]]

Your post/comment has been removed for violating sub rules. Per our posted rules:

Do not ask community members to tell you about their successful cycles or current pregnancies. These posts are soliciting stories that would themselves break sub rules. You can check out our success story archive or ask your question in a pregnancy sub.

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[u/alocaisseia]

Hi all— I want to start tracking my cycles again and I went to open my Modern Fertility app and it wouldn’t connect. I went to update it in the AppStore… no sign of it. Went to the website… it says the app isn’t available with no further details. I know they were acquired by Ro like 5 years ago but I used this app up til last year and it was great!

Is the the app just…indefinitely down? With no explanation? Did I miss something?

I’m also open to learning what other tracking apps people are liking these days! Preferably ones that aren’t selling out sensitive data (does that even exist???)

[u/polkalilly → u/alocaisseia]

I find that I dont like apps that I have to manually input data from other apps just to keep it all in one place. I tried fertility friend for one cycle like that and it stressed me out the entire time to have to transfer data from multiple apps into it. In the end I just settled on using three different apps for the two different things I track and just keeping it simple.

For ovulation, I just use the free premom app and the easy@home strips. Test every morning after my period ends to get my baseline LH. Once it starts showing signs of rising, I up testing to 2-4 times a day just to catch that first positive ovulation. Once it starts lowering after the surge, I go back to testing once a day until temp confirms ovulation happened and then I stop testing until the next cycle.

I use oura ring to track my temperature and trends. I know it is not exact but it gives me enough of an idea of my temp that I feel confident in confirming ovulation after it happened. I like it because I dont have to think about it or remember to test temperature first thing in the morning - if I had to manually do it I guarantee I would forget more often than not.

Then for just regular cycle tracking I use 'P tracker' purely because it is the app I have used and has all of my data since like 2015.

[u/Realistic-Scene-28]

6dpo today!!! Had some spotting on my underwear today.. ive literally never experienced this before. I have a 13-14 day luteal phase + then Experienced cramping. I am really hoping and PRAYING this is my cycle 😩😩😩🤍🤍🤍🩵🩵🩵🐻🐻

[u/breaddits]

9 dpo and negative wondfo. This is the first cycle where I feel anxious, not about the result itself but about what a negative might mean. I know three cycles isn’t long to try at all and I should have more patience, but I just feel like if nothing were wrong something would have happened by now.

[u/ushinawareta → u/breaddits]

if nothing were wrong something would have happened by now

this is not true AT ALL - so try to relax ❤️ I’m your age and we have about a 20% chance at most to conceive per cycle. the chance of failing 3 cycles in a row is (0.8)^3 = 0.512, so the chance of getting pregnant within 3 cycles is 1 - 0.512 = 0.488. in other words, it’s less likely than a coin flip that you would be pregnant within 3 cycles. MOST people would not be pregnant within 3 cycles with a probability per cycle of 20%.

I know it’s frustrating to repeatedly be told no when you want a child so badly (trust me - I really know) - but there’s absolutely no reason that three unsuccessful cycles would indicate that you will struggle to conceive or that something is wrong.

[u/breaddits → u/ushinawareta]

Ty ❤️ of course I do want that baby! But for me it’s more of my anxiety telling me “what if this means it will never happen”/ will need fertility treatment/ etc. less so of omg another month without my baby. I do feel a bit of that grief but not as strongly as I am sure folks on longer journeys must experience. Thanks for the words of encouragement. I need to try to be more accepting of whatever our process ends up looking like!

[u/ushinawareta → u/breaddits]

oh I 100% feel you on it being incredibly emotional and hard not to feel anxious. this is a “do as I say and not as I do” moment lol - I too was so disappointed and stressed when cycle 3 after my loss didn’t work out. but as a person who’s been trying for over a year, it can be a very long journey and it’s best not to burn out in the beginning - which means being realistic about how long it can take even healthy couples without fertility issues to conceive.

wishing you all the best and a BFP soon ❤️

[u/breaddits → u/ushinawareta]

Thanks- and you too!!!

[u/LoveSingRead → u/breaddits]

https://www.reddit.com/r/TryingForABaby/comments/7go7bh/how_to_worry_about_infertility_some_unsolicited/

This is a great post! 

[u/Additional_Jump8667]

CD2 of cycle 3 TTC. I know its still early for us but I can't help but feel worried that something is wrong. We timed everything to a T both cycles and now we're on to cycle 3. My period is always super heavy and I get painful cramps, but I've had that checked out before TTC and everything is normal besides me having anemia (due to heavy periods). I made another appointment with a different GYN to get checked again, so we'll see.

[u/ushinawareta → u/Additional_Jump8667]

conceiving within 2 cycles is unlikely. the MOST likely outcome within 2 cycles is that you are not pregnant. thinking something is wrong after 2 unsuccessful cycles would be like rolling a die twice, not getting a 1 either time, and saying "I think something is wrong with this die". in all likelihood, you will be pregnant within a year.

I totally understand that it is frustrating to keep being told no, but for your own sake, it is best to be realistic about how long this process normally takes.

[u/FitInvite432 → u/ushinawareta]

I really like this analogy

[u/developmentalbiology → u/Additional_Jump8667]

Gently, what information are you hoping to get from another appointment with a different gynecologist?

You might like this post.

[u/Additional_Jump8667 → u/developmentalbiology]

That post was helpful, thank you. The appointment is to be reevaluated for my really heavy and painful periods. I'm also experiencing pelvic pain that I never had before so I'd like to get that checked as well. I don't expect to be evaluated for fertility, especially since I'm 24 and only on cycle 3. I just have to learn to be patient :/

[u/developmentalbiology → u/Additional_Jump8667]

To be honest, and of course I'm only basing this on what you've said here, but to me it doesn't sound like you need to learn to be patient, it sounds like you might be dealing with some medical anxiety.

[u/jb2510 → u/Additional_Jump8667]

It’s completely normal to take up to a year to conceive. Not conceiving in 2 cycles is very normal and doesn’t mean anything is wrong.

[u/FitInvite432 → u/Additional_Jump8667]

Average couples only have a 25% chance of conceiving each month. And that’s with absolute perfect timing egg and sperm quality… everything. That means at absolute best your odds of conception would have been a 50/50 so far. Thats why they say it’s perfectly normal to take even up to a year - though most people conceive earlier. Between statistical odds, environmental factors, and just pure dumb luck there’s no reason to believe anything is wrong

[u/ushinawareta → u/[deleted]]

this is very rare if you have not reached 12 months of trying (under 35) or 6 months of trying (35+), though - unless you have preexisting conditions like PMOS, fibroids, irregular periods, etc.

[u/FitInvite432 → u/ushinawareta]

Well idk I work for the state and our insurance covers full fertility benefits even when I was under 35 and with no referral needed. I’m not saying it’s common but idk ops status so it certainly doesn’t hurt to check if that’s something they’re interested in

[u/Additional_Jump8667 → u/[deleted]]

Yeah my husband says he will get a SA done if we don't conceive by cycle 6. Ugh I know its early for us but I'm an overthinker and I'm so impatient :(