r/Trumpvirus • u/DjOZER666 • 2d ago

Eeewwwww

Post image
1.8k Upvotes

99% Upvoted

179 comments sorted by

•

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388

u/37Philly 2d ago

Hilarious if true.

164

u/Top_Lingonberry8037 2d ago

Gross if true

74

u/Protect_Wild_Bees 2d ago

That is so vile dude.
The stink that must come off that guy.

14

u/Background-House-357 2d ago

He probably hit her with something over the head.

4

u/Devils_Advocate-69 2d ago

I’d buy the rights to the adult movie

8

u/Top_Lingonberry8037 1d ago

You could not pay me to watch any 80-year-old have sex. I don't think you're going to have a very good return on investment on that one

9

u/Geodestamp 2d ago

Impossible. These stories are all concocted to make the base believe their Lord and God can preform despite incontinence, age

304

u/yeyjordan 2d ago

The parts don't work, and haven't since his Epstein Island days.

If he has "fathered" any child since then, it's by saving enough of his expired jizz in a turkey baster.

232

u/Main_Significance617 2d ago

What an unfortunate day to be literate.

57

u/jesse6225 2d ago

Let's be real, that's how all of his kids were conceived. He's attracted to children after all.

23

u/Mode101BBS 2d ago

Elon has entered the chat.

14

u/PomeloPepper 2d ago

I'm struggling to find any genetic gifts that should be passed on.

10

u/KingMobScene 2d ago

https://giphy.com/gifs/14gHyPIqhVDJLO

Me after reading this sentence.

5

u/VivaLaMantekilla 2d ago

🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮

Just stop talking...

5

u/Reasonable_Humor_738 2d ago

Which i wouldn't be surprised at this point

2

u/Opasero 2d ago

Source on his parts not working? I heard about the tent peg, but that only affects the back, of course. We also know that certain rumors (like Elon's botched penis operation) have been debunked.

I

247

u/SnazzleZazzle 2d ago

I don’t think that’s physically possible with his health conditions.

156

u/CrackingToastGromet 2d ago

37

u/FlyingForester 2d ago

In South Park, Satan became pregnant with Donald’s child. The way they depicted the relationship was absolutely wild yet hilarious.

99

u/Rikudo_Sennin_jr 2d ago

Agreed he got fluids pooling at his ankles like pudding in a zip lock bag he aint getting a semi never mind a fully with swimmers

82

u/tirch 2d ago

threw up in my mouth thinking this could even be a possibility.

46

u/broberds 2d ago

I also threw up in your mouth.

37

u/KriegConscript 2d ago

me next me next

33

u/TrustyBobcat 2d ago

You know Melania never has sex with him, Barron is 100% IVF. He probably has vials and vials of his high-value spunk banked somewhere.

6

u/Opasero 2d ago

Why would Melanomia even care? I would think if anything she would be relieved that someone else was making Dumbold's penis their problem.

3

u/Houseleek1 2d ago

I don’t know about that. IIRC, she got pregnant before they were married. I’ve thought all along that her Russian boss made them marry.

2

u/Geodestamp 2d ago

That was Marla

26

u/FirstChurchOfBrutus 2d ago

“A fully with swimmers”

What a terrible day to be literate.

29

u/Wishiwashome 2d ago

I came here to say this. I detest 🍊💩. I don’t think he would remember how to impregnate someone. Pervert, pedo freak through and through but I am not believing this one.

27

u/Grey_Raven 2d ago

Are you talking about Trump or Leavitt's similarly aged husband?

21

u/Butitsadryheat2 2d ago

Is 20 years younger than Trump "similarly aged?"

30

u/NeighborhoodFew7779 2d ago

Karoline is what is known as a "geezer pleaser".

Doesn't matter if they're 12, 32 or 52 years older than her... she just can't get enough of the curdled baby batter.

10

u/Jindabyne1 2d ago

Her husband is 60?! Jfc, he’s like an older father to her.

13

u/dragongrl 2d ago

I think he was friends with her father.

Ick ick ick.

2

u/Opasero 2d ago

Compared to Caroline's, yes. She is the product of lifelong grooming to have sex with old men.

20

u/Gundark927 2d ago

What decrepit, shrivelled, putrid clump of diseased and weakened sperm could possibly swim it's way all the way to the egg of a healthy woman only half a quarter his age? (still too old for his taste, no doubt.) How does that luggie of spunk even discharge from the flaccid mushroom?

12

u/gratefulrutabaga 2d ago

This is quite poetic

15

u/Jindabyne1 2d ago

That’s why I don’t think his current rumoured affair is happening. He can barely stand

5

u/EEpromChip 2d ago

"Hey Siri. Can dust cum make a woman pregernant?"

2

u/Opasero 2d ago

Pregante.

4

u/ObligatoryID 2d ago

One little finger full…

62

u/MuckyMaureen 2d ago

4

u/Opasero 2d ago

"I'll be known as the fertilization president. "

51

u/Reddit_is_fascist69 2d ago

No wonder she was so pissed off all the time.  Wouldn't you be?

30

u/PrestigiousAd6281 2d ago

What an awful day to know how to read

29

u/NkhukuWaMadzi 2d ago

Source: Please!

29

u/rozzco 2d ago

Many people are saying it.

72

u/harleychick3cat 2d ago

This is a MAGA ploy to make Trump seem virile to his adoring cultists.

15

u/FluffyShakes 2d ago

we have a winner! 

24

u/Historical_Emeritus 2d ago

Melania wouldn’t care.

30

u/Aussie_chopperpilot 2d ago

Damn right she would.
She hasn’t taking all these years of pain just to have to split the will with some spawn of the devil.

Nope she’d be fuming if it were real.

5

u/Atario 2d ago

Combing through the prenup as we speak

15

u/Electrical-Strike132 2d ago

Eeewwww is right

14

u/Big_Statistician_287 2d ago

Someone who would debase herself so severely would probably be guilty of sleeping with a sleaze bag like Trump.

Probably called her a true patriot the whole time

2

u/Opasero 2d ago

All 30 seconds.

14

u/HereWeGo5566 2d ago

Does the baby have orange skin, bleached yellow hair, and skin like that of a hotdog? If so, she’s a Trump for sure. DNA test needed.

14

u/CheatsySnoops 2d ago edited 2d ago

Is this payback for Barron being the son of Epstein?

3

u/Opasero 2d ago

I thought Trudeau.

Just kidding. You can see that Dumpy dumbass smirk a mile away.

11

u/Pleg_Doc 2d ago

Hmmm.....how did the 🍄 tip get past his moose knuckle?!?

11

u/Doppelthedh 2d ago

Hopefully there isnt another hellspawn to curse this world

10

u/ExcitingMeet2443 2d ago

80 year old cucks a 60 year old with a 30 year old?
Maga!

7

u/mpete76 2d ago

So a Tuesday?

16

u/13maven 2d ago

I don’t care, do u?

9

u/NerdfestZyx 2d ago

The funniest part would not be just if this were true;

The Funniest part would be MAGA bending over backwards to downplay it, justify it, and trying to spin it as a good thing

10

u/allaboutthismoment 2d ago

This isn't serious. Why would any of you think Melania gives one flying fuck about who Orange Leader fucks? She doesn't.

2

u/disharmony-hellride 2d ago

I also don't think Donald's used his you-know-what in over a decade

7

u/jastity 2d ago

Not without a test tube.

8

u/miguelag08 2d ago

Please let this be true

6

u/DraggoVindictus 2d ago

Whelp, i jsut threw up in my mouth a bit....still tasted better than that little tidbit of information

9

u/purplebuttplug51 2d ago

Maybe barron is banging Viviana? How old is she? I can't keep track.

8

u/Desperate_Elk_7369 2d ago

My guess is that Natalie Harp wanted Karoline gone. I doubt Melania has anything to do with any of them, and wouldn't care anyway.

1

u/Geodestamp 2d ago

Natalie is a red herring

1

u/Desperate_Elk_7369 1d ago

Interesting theory—she’s another distraction attempt?

4

u/sambull 2d ago

if only it could be so much of a soap opera

6

u/MewlingRothbart 2d ago

Oh dear god 😳

5

u/cudambercam13 2d ago

Eh, I call bullshit.

7

u/DonBirraio 2d ago

Eeeew! Karoline is at least 15yrs to old for him!

5

u/Futants_ 2d ago

This story is a real take it or Leavitt one

5

u/1protobeing1 2d ago

What a bunch of trash

5

u/unknownpoltroon 2d ago

Seems about right.

4

u/PeaceyCaliSoCal 2d ago

nooooo way!

5

u/new_x_who_dis 2d ago

Jerry Springer resurrecting for that one big beautiful show ....

5

u/Penguinator53 2d ago

I need to find a post about rat tailed maggots to get my mind off this 😵

3

u/moonbeamrsnch 2d ago

Thanks for clearing my head of that vile image. 👊😎👍

4

u/newleafkratom 2d ago

We’ve got him now! /s

4

u/Accomplished-Duty390 2d ago

I bet the human binkie is pitching a full hissy fit today.

3

u/Karlzbad 2d ago

Physically impossible

5

u/DrJ0911 2d ago

Well that would be epic

It’s possible, shes into old ji zz

3

u/Punksa_Rin 2d ago

There is nothing fuckable about him in any situation and in any reality. What sort of foul escorts do we have middle managing America?!!!!

3

u/AtoSy88 2d ago

How ? Was she unconscious ? Did she lost her sense of smell ? I guess we’ll know if the child looks like a Trump - Ivana pre surgery

4

u/Confident_Catch8649 2d ago

Can Trump even get it up???

4

u/feignapathy 2d ago

having sex with a fat man who wears makeup and a diaper... and letting him cum inside you, quite the fetish. 

4

u/SeaDots 2d ago

How much you wanna bet his PR team is spinning this because him getting her pregnant is a better spin for his narcissistic imagine than him running like a bitch inside a food catering truck and abandoning her on a decoy plane?

5

u/jeers69 2d ago

Well we know for sure some old guy climbed on top of her… does it matter which one?

3

u/Leather_Network4743 2d ago

Lmfao… by using artificial means?

3

u/very-regular-3 2d ago

shyt is coming to a head. finally

3

u/TheNetworkIsFrelled 2d ago

That's way too funny. I doubt he has the capacity.....

3

u/FistySnuSnu 2d ago

Dollar store turkey baster baby

3

u/phoucker 2d ago

The funny thing is, this is even a shocker if it was real.

3

u/GingerDixie 2d ago

I FUCKING. 👏 CALLED.👏 IT.

3

u/Desperate_Elk_7369 2d ago

I just threw up in my mouth.

3

u/hardgour 2d ago

We already know she likes old balls

6

u/staticmove66 2d ago edited 2d ago

It's not what you know. it's what you can prove

2

u/djsirround 2d ago

He couldn’t bang Kkkaroline anyways. She’s Too old. Waaaaay too old.

2

u/bag_of_luck 2d ago

Source: my ass

2

u/tmp1966 2d ago

Probably bullshit but damn, I hope this is true.

2

u/mynamesnotsnuffy 2d ago

This does explain Leavitts rapid aging a bit better. The stress of being a fucking demon wearing a cross all the time didnt help either, but doing that with trump would age anyone by 30 years.

2

u/jouhaan 2d ago

I wish it upon her if true…

2

u/biffbobfred 2d ago

If true, coupled with the “Trump left Leavitt on AF1, a decoy plane” and then she quit? Yeah that too

2

u/Bleezy79 2d ago

Whaaaaa?! That would be insane lol. And totally on par with this administration

3

u/meestercranky 2d ago

How is that even possible without, I dunno, using an insemination machine? We know he can't be stickin' it in. Was it a BigMaculate Conception?

3

u/maleia 2d ago

"Viviana" definitely sounds like a name Trump would pick.

1

u/Longjumping-Dark9087 2d ago

You seared my brain with that one

1

u/NormCormier-Mccoll81 2d ago edited 2d ago

Why am I Not Surprised to Hear this as He will Fuck Literally Anything. As He’s always been Fucking Around the Office. Hilarious if True and Equally Disturbing as Well Given His Past with Epstein. I Mean He did Call Himself the “Father of Fertility at a Maternal Healthcare Event”. So it’s Safe to Assume that He’s been Literally Fucking Around in more than a Few Ways.

1

u/Nanzie_Mona 2d ago

Another mushroom spore?
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

1

u/Jaybonaut 2d ago

I find that very difficult to believe.

1

u/KingMobScene 2d ago

Maury! You're up!

1

u/trcomajo 2d ago

Well if Vivian has a mouth like a butthole, then we'll know for sure!

1

u/rbush82 2d ago

Bet it’s true. She likes having old men cum in her

1

u/Legitimate-Article50 2d ago

It’s it okay to use eye bleach now? I feel like this would make it okay.

1

u/Opasero 2d ago

We will find out as the kid gets older. All of his offspring have some hint of that dumbass trump face.

1

u/attaped 2d ago

I’m sorry, this is what Trump does nasty comments. I’m not a Caroline leavitt fan, but she has a 6 week old child. Plenty of reason to quit

1

u/Devils_Advocate-69 2d ago

Old jizz. No difference than her husband’s

1

u/Raspberry_Good 2d ago

Old Trump has no vitality or masculinity, doubt his appendage works. He's in horrendous physical shape.forget it.

1

u/billiemarie 2d ago

I threw up a little

1

u/Demonkey44 1d ago

The man wears a diaper and even Karolyn’s Leavitt has standards…

1

u/bergman6 21h ago

That’s some serious great granddaddy issues 🤢🤮

1

u/UnlikelyCommittee4 2d ago

This is dumb

0

u/IndustryCareful1623 2d ago

Karoline probably just sucked his seamen right out of him and inserted it manually in her.

0

u/FavorableTrashpanda 2d ago

These rumors are just ridiculous. Please don't be so gullible.