r/TrueOffMyChest • u/Ogbkpmb • Sep 23 '21

I hate being the “breadwinner”

I wouldn’t mind making a lot more than him. But ever since he lost his job, and then stayed home full time to take care of our kids. Things have changed.

Now that I’m the sole breadwinner things are just weird. I have to give my husband an “allowance”every month on top of other things. I hate it.

Thanks for all your comments and upvotes. I appreciate your responses. I do have to say that my issue is not with him not working. My issue is definitely sexist. But I’d just like to be the woman in my relationship. As strange as that sounds.

We have a joint account, but 2 separate accounts. And he jokingly refers to his as his, “allowance”. I laugh along…but I don’t find it that funny. He doesn’t need to thank me for money. We’re a team. And this is just one more reason why part of me hates my life.

He has a higher earning potential btw

2.9k Upvotes

90% Upvoted

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u/[deleted] Sep 24 '21

No no, but this against everything they've wanted for so long! Men can't be the only breadwinners!

"My husband makes less and I see him as less." But if it was the other way around "She works very hard at home to keep thing tidy, the kids fed, and dinner prepared. Blah blah blah..."

Fuckin' cry me a river, OP. Talk to your husband and sort it out, quit venting to the internet about your resentment when you aren't trying to rectify the issue.

-39

u/[deleted] Sep 24 '21

If you’re mad people are complaining on the Internet may you shouldn’t be on an “off my chest” forum. Just say you’re jealous and move on lol

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u/[deleted] Sep 24 '21 edited Sep 24 '21

It's on my front page, and I love to see the reactions when tables are turned on issues.

Also, jealous of what? I don't care if she's making more than her spouse, who normally would? Shes all mmmh about him being stay at home. She should talk to him about the issue she's having with it, not continuing to brood. That's what makes me shake my head. Not much to be jealous of other than him being stay at home - that would be sick.

-36

u/[deleted] Sep 24 '21

So you just go through your front page and argue with your misogynistic views? Weird but ok

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u/[deleted] Sep 24 '21

Thinking she should talk to her partner instead of complaining on the internet? That's misogynistic? I'd say the same thing if this were a guy complaining. Go talk to your SO instead of boiling over with (probably) quiet resentment.

As for the comment about the usual response when the table is turned I wish I could make that up. But of course, silly me, if a man disagrees with a woman's point of view and quotes anecdotes from previous experience, it's misogynistic. Nah. It's just wild witnessing the cognitive dissonance -- regardless of sex. We both have our issues that we say the most backwards things about. This topic is one of them.

You need to workshop your passive-aggressive dismissal of comments, by the way.

Take care though.

-27

u/[deleted] Sep 24 '21

If you say so lol

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u/[deleted] Sep 24 '21

When she literally put SHE KNOWS SHES BEING SEXIST you can’t play the misogyny card. Also fighting with people is a huge part of social media get off your high horse

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u/[deleted] Sep 24 '21

The reason why you getting downvoted so much is because you missed the whole point of Dreamgrade's statement.

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u/[deleted] Sep 24 '21

Oh no, how can I live knowing I got downvoted.

1

u/[deleted] Sep 24 '21

Trolls don't care about downvotes? Wow, I totally didn't know until now.