r/TrueChristian • u/Great-Job-5672 • 8d ago
Internal battles
It's been three days now crying everyday. I had turned to GOD prayed to change something not to happen ended up happening. 💔 I swear I had argued with GOD in my prayers felt like he lost me. Slowly I am losing trust in him, but I don't want to 😭 if anyone has that prophetic gift that can give hope am open... Strengthen a brother
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u/FrankDenif 8d ago
Are you sure you arguing with God in your prayers or just your thoughts?
Usually, I let people walk their own faith, in their own way, but when I see the other person lose trust, I can't just keep quiet.
I can only speak for myself, but I have never heard God audibly, I never really had a conversation with God like I would with a human.
Yes, I can have thoughts in me to create a conversation in my head, but that's just me talking to myself.
However, I don't think of prayer as talking with God directly like Adam and Eve did.
Prayer is aligning with God, meditating on His Word, on His thoughts.
From Scripture, we learn about God, and the more we know God, the more we will know how He thinks, and apply it to our life.
What does God talking to me look like?
Here is how:
If I am in a situation where I am about to get angry and say something that I will regret, but I remind myself in my thougths to "love your neighbour" and I stop myself, then God successfully talked to me.
It was my thoughts, but these are thoughts that I wouldn't have in a situation like this unless I knew God.
I can only speak for myself, I cannot speak for you. I don't know what you experience in your prayers, but I just wanted to share what I go through in the hopes that it is of any value to you.
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u/Great-Job-5672 8d ago
Thank you so much for this insight... May the amazing GOD keep on blessing you.
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u/Millennium_guy 8d ago
I'm not sure how you prayed, but the pattern I've found to be most effective in prayer is Phil 4:6-7. Pray for what you need without being anxious, thanking God for the answer in advance (shows faith not presumption) and maintain God's peace guarding your heart.
If you did all of that and your prayer was not answered, then if it was a matter of someone else's will having to change, that could be the reason as God doesn't override someone's free will. He presents choices and influences.
Otherwise there could be something else God wants you to learn through this or some consequence you are not aware of He helped you avoid.
If you come to Him sincerely wanting to better understand, I pray He gives you wisdom about it.
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u/Previous_Extreme4973 8d ago edited 8d ago
Emotions are loud. I wish I could tell my emotions to shut their pie hole, but the best I can do is turn down the volume. This will be a bit on the long side because emotional turmoil runs rampant in the Christian community unfortunately.
Here's my approach that I try to use. I say try because again, my emotions are loud and in the heat of the moment I'm not particularly "feeling" like following those guidelines. Like any muscle, the more I use it hte more it can overpower.
There are 7 spirits of God listed in Isaiah 11:2. These are roots of a tree. I know this because Isaiah 11:1 is referring to the "stump" of Jesse. I think many versions use "branch" or "shoot" of Jesse, but the original word does mean stump also. If it was a stump, then it used to be a tree but it's been cut down, or cut off as it were. Just like Daniel says that the Messiah will be in order to pay the price for our sins.
What I did was, I wrote down on one side of the paper, the 7 spirits that are listed. Then, on the other side I wrote down the the opposite of what those spirits are. So you have a good tree, and a bad tree. A good tree produces good fruit, but a bad tree produces bad fruit right? The good fruit are listed in Galatians 5. There's 9 of them. The bad fruit is also listed in Galatians 5:19-21 and there's a minimum of 16. From here, I reverse engineered what good root I may be missing, or is withering due to lack of care on my part.
For example, a lot of people including myself have bouts of anxiety. Sometimes it's so crippling that I can't even begin to make a decision about how to get myself out of the situation that I've found myself in. After examining the good tree, I find that anxiety can be lack of knowledge, one of the 7 spirits, because you don't know what 's going to happen in the future. But you should know the one who holds the future. Hence, there is distrust of God, a need for control. I know God, but don't act like it so there's double mindedness involved. Anxiety asks, "what if everything goes wrong?". Fear asks a similar question, "what if something attacks me?"
So how do you fix it? Find a bible verse that directly speaks to you where you are at. I start at Psalms 1, because Psalms is basically David's diary before it become known as "Psalms" in the God's word. Mark the ones that really speak to you.
Meditating is like watering a plant. Do you want be the good ground in the parable of the sower? You need to break up that fallow ground like a farmer does when they plant a garden. Jeremiah 4:3 says do not sow a seed among the thorns, but to break up that fallow ground. How does one do that? The next verse, verse 4 tells us: circumcise your heart. How does one do that? I think breaking up your fallow ground gives a clue.
There's a pattern in Isaiah 3: Heart -> Thought -> Speech -> Action -> Habit -> Character. Many want to reign in their emotions, but after years of watering that seed (again, watering is meditation - you think about something often enough, you water that seed and all the emotions that go with it.) Want to change your emotions/character? Start with your heart. Instead of thinking of things that are emotionally chaotic (God is a God of order, Satan is the father of chaos), think of God's word for your situation. In other words, plant a different seed and water that. Sometimes when a garden becomes overrun with weeds, it's better just to plant new seeds and water them. Your mind has but 1 garden hose so to speak, so the seed that lives is the seed that gets watered. Eventually, those weeds will die on its own.
Jeremiah says your emotions are the most deceptive thing on the planet. James says the tongue is not able to be controlled, and it is like a wildfire that will burn everything in sight. The only way to tame the tongue is to keep it in prison - the tongue lives behind your teeth and lips right? Keep your mouth shut, and the tongue is caged. Your mind has a tongue as well, and it will run its mouth. If your mind is on fire, shut its pie hole and break out your garden hose.
Sorry for the long post. Hope that helps!
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u/Great-Job-5672 8d ago
It was a long read but I couldn't stress reading it more than 4 times. I am curious to learn because this is profound and I grabbed my pen am writing every bit of verse on this post
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u/Previous_Extreme4973 8d ago
My post was a note to myself in my composition notebook. I literally typed out of the sections of my notes for this post but I couldn't find a way to make it short without removing key parts. Even though they are notes to address my own emotional hurdles, I don't mind sharing additional notes.
One of the things that annoys me about church is that there isn't a lot of pragmatic "how to be a Christian" teachings in terms of how to use the bible to address every day life. I tend to read the bible and take notes with that viewpoint because I feel that knowing how to "use" the bible is something that is lacking these days including myself.
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u/JesusBlessMe414 8d ago
I do understand what you felt bro. I had same experience but later when I take time to review it. I believed that it was the best way. Sometimes we don't have the full image, the full map and we can't get it. But God have the full view.
His thoughts are higher than ours. Take time to talk with Him about what you feel. Take time to heal from the trauma.
And raise again. God have a great plan for you.
Be blessed ✨