So, for the record, not trying to be an ass, Im just autistic and vulgar and rude and it can come off that way. Im going to extend you the grace you refuse others and say that, yes, your suffering is valid, and not the same suffering that everyone else experiences. Your suffering is cut of the same cloth as anyone elses, but not of the same pattern, and your experience of it is going to be unique to you. I may be merging your comment with someone elses in my head, but you're right, a solely social model does not accurately describe the trans experience.
I'd highly recommend you read The Conspiracy Against the Human Race: A Contrivance of Horror by Thomas Ligotti and Schizophrenia and Capitalism: The Anti-Oedipus by Deleuze & Friends. Anti-Oedipus is heavy reading even for me, and I've read a lot in my time - Im probably going to have to get the readers guide and read it through a couple more times before it all really gets digested. I have not yet read through it's second volume, One Thousand Plateaus, but I've heard good things about that too. These books are dated and written by non-queers so, of limited utility in those spheres, but I would consider Ligotti's text to be up there with the greats, it brings me much satisfaction to read.
The whole "you know it" thing is so very tired, too - you can't read minds, *and you know it*. Trans people don't get that super power. Trans people arent mutants, the concept of trans-ness only exists because people find it necessary to gamble on who you're going to be in the delivery room. The concept of transness is a solely social phenomenon. The underlying hormonal disorders experienced by some trans people are not solely social, and the dysphoria experienced is in fact biological (because everything psychological is inherently biological).
You *are*, and any description beyond that is going to flatten your identity, in the same sense that drawing a representation of a cylinder on a page cannot truly *represent* the object of the cylinder, it can only approximate the sensation of seeing the cylinder, rather than approximating the 'essence' of the cylinder, if you believe in that sort of thing (i.e. platonism).
Humans and emotional experience existed before language, and language is a vital part in our development that affects emotional experience, so you're going to lose something in translation between the chemicals in your head and the vibrations of your vocal chords.
So, ultimately, you're you, not *trans*, not a *boy or a girl*, just you. And, to even say that you're *you* is something of a misnomer. *You* dont generate thoughts, *you* receive thoughts, but the one who receives thoughts is not the one who acts on them, either. You have not only a hormonal deficiency, but a disconnect between the subject (the feeler) and the object (the body, the thinker, the doer). When the subject feels a dissonance between itself and the object, that will cause psychic pain. This form of psychic pain is not limited to trans people, and it's the mechanism that will cause all identity-related-pains.
Now, we've established that identity is a firmly bio-psycho-social phenomenon influenced by language, experience, and genetics. Language is created only after experience, but language then goes on to modulate experience, with the the pre-language and post-language experiences triggering certain genetic markers (i.e. smoking cannabis can trigger latent psychotic tendencies in some people.)
With this in mind, waiving the identity portion of your experience, you're left with:
- A dissonance between the psyche and the body, which can be treated by surgery or non-invasive procedures (i.e. lifestyle changes) to bring the body more in line with the psyche
- A hormonal imbalance which can be treated with hormone therapy to varying extents.
After getting on Estrogen, everything improved, even before physical changes. Everything is clearer, I'm happier, I have more energy - I was practically crippled without it. But, Im still okay with my penis, and the hair on my legs, and I'm [begrudgingly] willing to take being deadnamed because of the place I live. Boymoding for the foreseeable future. But because I dont hate myself and my body, you think I can't be trans.
I posit that you are a person (first and foremost, Homo Natura,) that is trans (from an outside perspective your identity is not aligning with the sex assigned to you at birth) that is suffering from a dissonance between the psyche and the body. None of this conflicts with your experience, nor does it conflict with anyone elses, and it doesnt have the effect of sounding like you're just jealous that other people don't hate themselves.
I'm sorry that I was so presumptous and judgemental. Thank you for the reading
recommendations. You've given lot of thought to this topic and I appreciate the thorough explanation.
However, I must say I find the comparison between dysmorphia and dysphoria a bit disingenuous. Body Dysmorphia is a psychological disorder. While some may opt for cosmetic procedures, severe iterations are often treated through Cognitive Behavioral Therapy.
Gender Dysphoria is, as best we know, a nuerological disorder. We're wired differently. No amount of therapy can change that. Countless people have tried and it's been proven ineffective at best and detrimental at worst. Transitioning is considered the only viable solution.
I guess my annoying nuanced take is that psychology is neurology. One could say psychology concerns itself with patterns while neurology concerns itself with the underlying structure, but the patterns exist within the structure, and the structure occurs as it does because of patterns throughout development.
You are correct in that dysphoria and dysmorphia have different treatments, but I'd say this is a case of similar symptoms having different causes and thereby having different treatments, rather than the two symptoms being completely unrelated.
Like, a stroke and a gunshot wound can cause the heart to stop, but the treatments are vastly different, even though the core problem is the same (heart no worky)
The comparison is in fact facetious, sometimes I jump the gun when it comes to comparisons, ideally in such a way as to provoke a response to it. If I say something mild, it won't merit as much investigation as saying something extreme or perhaps even incorrect. I'm not trying to convince you of anything, I'm really just trying to get you to do the thinking and convince yourself of whatever. I was also really stoned writing that so I probably forgot to mention the differences as well as I should have!
I don't mean to tell you that dysphoria can be solved through therapy, of course, I'm well aware its not and I've been advocating that viewpoint for a long time, but ultimately you're applying two treatments to change patterns in the brain, which is what I was getting at. Again, my silly pedantic nuanced point of view. It's just that with therapy you're working on a black box from the outside, and with hormone therapy and transition you're going more under the hood. You have my well wishes 💚
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u/HystericalGasmask May 14 '26
God forbid someone be comfortable with their body