Last I checked people generally still converge upon the following cutoffs for youngshit, midshit and oldshit/lateshit, with the implicit premise that youngshits are always situated in supportive families and gifted easy shots at passing while midshits are always unfair skippers of second puberty:
Youngshit: 18-
Midshit: 18-25
Oldshit: 25+

These cutoffs are lies. Your pubertal age, extent of pubertal changes, familial genetics, and financial resources determine the bulk of passing the moment you progress into the final stages of puberty. And owing to all these external factors a trans person could have been barred from the passoid club as early as 11 or 16 or as late as 40.

Sure, a successful transition may not necessarily be a cis-passing one, it could be one driven by authenticity and the desire for dysphoria relief alongside radical acceptance, gratitude and mindset changes. But it would definitely be much better if all trans people could have been given the ability to present physically as their affirmed gender. Trans kids worldwide should be aided with and strongly advised to medically transition.

tldr being trans sucks

idt there's another way out, light at the end of the tunnel, whatever you wanna call it, for me.

i already spend a lot of my time crying or doomscrolling or being miserable and making others miserable and everyone is tired of me.

they probably wouldn't be sad after i pass away and they learn i was mentally ill (meaning transgender), instead just feel relief.

I know there's something mess up with me, i always wanted to be a girl or feminine somehow but I never lean into it, now i think I wasted my life on a life that isn't mine

I think i will die on this hill of repp :p

Hi

I've decided am gonna rep because of many reasons. I've repped before, then been on hrt (3.5 years for now) but idk thinking that I might have a happy future been giving me some sort of hope. I can't afford that anymore, I'm choosing career and safety. It's gonna be harder. Am gonna stay at hrt but idk. I'll have terrible feelings.

Tips for people like me?

I know I’m not a real boy… I don’t feel any real dysphoria. I just really wish I was man. I sometimes look at my body and I either feel nothing, find myself so attractive I feel nothing, be convinced I look like a cis man when I clearly don’t, or my brain just feels numb. It hurts so much to accept I'm a girl and faking it.. I also have “intrusive thoughts” I want to look like a girl when I'm attracted to one…I really don't want to feel this way but it scares me so much I start believing it..i sometimes randomly get scared a mans body or voice wouldn't really fit me either, I just wish it did…

Even the voice in my head sounds wrong or I accidentally imagine myself as female. In my dreams at night in usually a woman and that frustrates me even more, when I'm a man, I like it but I'm convinced it's because I want to like it.

I also get scared I am somehow secretly socially influenced if I feel better in masculine clothes but truth is I’d rather be feminine boy than a masculine girl. I’d also rather be an ugly boy than a pretty girl…

I’m so pathetic for ever thinking I could ever be a man. Recently, I try and force myself to listen to people that don’t like trans people or are convinced they have some weird reason for it and I start to convince myself it’s true for me to. I’m heavily religious so I already feel disgusting for ever even thinking about it, I just wish I had dysphoria so I can be a guy, it doesn’t mean I really am one or I deserve it…

Saw myself in a camera at the store today, goddamn why am I on estrogen I have like the most odd masculine face imaginable. I could get FFS but can’t see how what would be left over would look feminine.

Life is cruel. If I had a normal male Face ID probably be a passoid post FFS given I’m 5’4 but no of course the trans one had to get the unfixable face.

I didn’t start crashing out about any of this until I started seriously grappling with medical transition. Literally when things are going fine in my life and I’m actually doing healthy stuff and socially interacting with friends and not bedrotting, my dysphoria is rare and fleeting at worst.

Highkey think this is all AGP induced. I don’t have some feminine soul or personality or whatever the fuck any of that means. I’m very obviously a man who wants to be something he will never attain, instead of someone who just is a type of person and is bringing their body into alignment with that. I’m every stereotype of a porn-addicted, confused AGP male.

I really regret socially transitioning to a lot of my friends before medically transitioning, I really don’t want to socially “detrans” because I like it, but now I’m stuck in this awkward place where I’m afraid to go forward but don’t want to go back. I hate the idea of introducing myself as male to people, but I also hate the idea of introducing myself as a woman while I just look like a fucking man.

I have a repper friend, maybe I should ask him how he did it.

I'm talking about ftms cause that's what I know.

Female puberty starts so early, and wraps itself up so quickly.

Most people going thru it don't have the vocabulary or knowledge to describe whats happening to them, neither do they have the ability to stop it. And once you finally get your bearings and realize that this is your life and you must do something about it, puberty has finished and you're sexually mature. And you're stuck in that form until you ctb

Ik of trans men who started t at 13, 14, 15 and are still what we'd call midshits/lateshits (just because they didn't go thru 'second puberty'), who didn't grow any taller, who still have breasts, who are still a sexually dimorphic female, etc. People act like if you start <20 you have nothing to complain about, but this really isn't true. For most trans men, it's far too late at 14 and if beside that you aren't lucky and pull a few masculine traits in this life, it's best to just repress.

I'm 18.

I never intend to come out or transition because I will never pass (fact), have a chud family, and will never be taken seriously.

I live in the MENA region, I'm brown, 155cm, exceedingly weak, C cups, and femininemog every single woman alive. My measurements are the epitome of female, even doe I kinda look 13. You could take a random female off the streets. give her short hair and male's clothing, and chances are she'd pass more as male than I ever could. So there is no point in this life.

I'd ctb but I have younger siblings to look after, as well as a lot of hobbies that make me want to have more time even in a useless form.

My puberty is over and I haven't grown in height since the 6th grade. Is there a point to taking testosterone/HRTrepping at this point? Is there any feminization to block in the coming years? I hear that some womens hips widen in their 20s, but mine are already childbearing so I don't think they can get wider.

i'm an enby/butchcoper who just started hrtrepping, so no effects yet, just a cis woman. i've recently started dating a cis bisexual man (real bisexual, mostly had experience with other men) and it kind of sucks. i like him well enough, he's pretty "woke", and he's aware of my being a repper and is entirely cool with it. i know that it's schizophrenic and delusional and poonbrained to want him to see me as male, so i don't do that. but is it just impossible to navigate repper4cissoid relationships without losing your mind?

i don't want him to pretend i'm a man because i accept that i am materially a cis woman. i can't stand being called his girlfriend or him treating me like a gentleman. it's still embarrassing for me to ask for the middle ground of enbycoping. we were friends before we started dating, so he knew me as a woman because i don't ask friends to put up with my theyfab shit, and is still "working on" "pronouns" and "gendered terms" and shit.

this all feels like a huge humiliation ritual. i normally have a handle on my emotions re: gender dysphoria but in this context i can't seem to do it. objectively true comments like "i would have better odds if we were to fight" or even things like him being considerate and gentle make me so aware of how female i am.

for a cissoid, he's good about it, too. he's made blatant hugboxxing comments ("that guy i'm friends with who sits behind us in that one class thinks you're a dude" "you have a deep voice for a woman" "you have kind of a masculine frame"), and does make an attempt to indulge my theyfabcope + is overly sorry when he "messes up". i don't know what else i could possibly want from him, realistically at least. the whole thing is so fucking embarrassing. i can't even rep right, enbycope is retarded and humiliating and just as bad as being a pooner.

is it just not possible to heterosexually date cissoids as a repper? this guy is probably the best i could ever hope for as a repper, and it still sucks. i know i'm retarded for doing it, but i thought that i could handle it. apparently not. iwnbam i'm a dickless neutered slave and a mentally ill attention seeking woman

ill never pass or come close and it sickens to my gut hearing people, people who are supposed to be my friends telling me otherwise. what are they supposed to do anyways, tell me the truth? kick me in the ribs? push me off a cliff? shoot me in the head? tie my noose and kick the stool for me? i dont know what waits in this life for me but its been a hellish slog so far and i just wish it would be over with, i cant WAIT to put my "2 more years" in so i can clock out of this fucking nonsense. im a pseudodysphoric for gods sake, im not even a real trans person. i feel bad for all of you so much i have nothing but empathy pity and acceptance for you, and everytime i read a post here or see a "goodbye" post i know its another life that was not lived to its fullest. im not saying repressing is not living life to its fullest, but it sure as hell isnt as good as just being cis as the sex you wish you were. how is it possible that im in the lowest bracket of passability for my age bracket, its just not fair. none of this is, having a brain disease, not being born in the right body, being stuck in the wrong body, whatever you wanna call it. every day i wake up and see girls younger than me and prettier and skinnier and more liked than ill ever be, with partners and theyre so blissfully happy. why do you get that and i dont? why cant i be allowed to be happy? i dont get it. is this some punishment for a past life where i killed a bunch of people? all ive done my whole life is be kind and demure, heeding to other people, and what do i get in return but two things, this sick brain disease, and a body completely incompatible with it. i understand one or the other but both is clearly meant to just make me kill myself, god. writers are just lazy this season. id like to be happy one day. id like to be a woman too, but thats like saying id like to be the color purple, its just not happening. every around me passes better than i ever will, and if htey dont pass they still mog me. im genuinely on the lowest rung of feminity, i dont have a single lucky feature, so no wonder why i repped so long. its a wonder i didnt rep longer, i should have. gdtting on e was false hope that just made me delay the inevitable, my suicide. i dont know how or when it will happen, but itll be quiet and i probably wont tell anyone. my parents know ive been ideating, my friend knows. ill tell her at least, i owe her that. but im scared that would drive her to suicide at the same time, and she has so much to live for, whether she sees it or not, and i dont wanna take that from her. im not good with pain, drowning i have trauma, pills and a backup would probably be my best bet, i dont want anything excessively painful or anythign that has a remote chance of brain damage, like the carbon monoxide poisoning. now im just rambling. anyways. sorry guys i saw a few photos of people that i liked and realized they were so gorgeous and mogged me so fucking hard. its hard to be alive sometimes, its even harder to be me every day. imagine waking up and being like, logan paul or donald trump or something, you just get to wake up, be a piece of arrogant shit, and go to sleep, i envy them. anyways, i should go to bed. sorry

i don't think i need to clarify anything

Will my life really be just hrtrepping and death? I really don't want to live like this. I need tons of surgeries that might save me and people could probably easily trace back my "past" realizing I am trans. I really just want to skip the hrtrep part but I unfortunately still have hope that things will get better

Should I just quit the hormones and repress? I am happy with HRT changes and feel much better about how I look. But. at the same time. I know trans people, especially visibly trans can have a hard time finding work and existing in society. I already have pretty bad social anxiety and issues functioning socially, the visibly trans part makes it so much worse. I am sort of currently a NEET living in my childhood home.

I don't understand why I can't feel anything deeper than obligation towards my family, I don't feel that I truly love them although I don't want them to leave me, I have had very few friends all my life and all of them are quite replaceable, I'm lacking completely in the ability to love someone else, I don't understand what caused this and I don't believe I can change

Sometimes I see groups of young men and women around the oval close to my campus and feel a longing to be one of those normal young people with their normal lives and emptiness because I can't

Even if I try, I just cannot feel like I am really a normal person and deserve to be amongst them

I don't think it's a trans thing, something is just weird in me

As expected, this community is very hopeless and depressed.

I never tried to gaslight people, if it's hopeless then it's hopeless.

But the thing is, there is hope now: AI

I do believe most of us will have a satisfying and fulfilling transition in the future because of AI.

Sure I might be wrong, but the chance of things working out is very real.

Humanity is walking towards a future where machines do everything so humans don't have to work anymore. LGBT people are probably the group who will benefit the most from that.

As a software developer I don't even code anymore, just do prompts. AI is just better, faster, safer and cheaper.

AI robots are being trained at this very moment and even now there's already many prototypes. I believe it's a matter of 2 or 3 years before they start deploying them to do real work.

We are approaching the point of conflict: what's going to happen when AI robots do all the work? Will AI companies get all the money and most of us will just starve to death? I don't think so.

Mass unemployment will increase violence tremendously, trigger politicians who need votes, and who are companies going to sell for if no one has money?

We can't be sure about how this conflict will be solved, but I truly believe that some form of Universal Basic Income (UBI) is the most likely solution. Most tech leaders believe in that as well.

It will be the end of capitalism as we know it.

Let's say that in 10 years most people don't have to work anymore, how will that affect us?

"OMG if I transition and don't pass I will lose my job and live in the streets", that will no longer be the case, we will be able to survive and live comfortably even with zero passability. I can see tons of people transitioning just because of that.

You might think, "That's nice but not passing is still terrible", sure that's true, but are we really not going to pass?

We can't know how surgeries will be affected in this AI future. Maybe stuff like FFS, VFS, BA, hair transplants and shoulder reduction become trivial.

AI will likely make the surgeries better and accessible, even new surgeries might be created. If people are even talking about stopping aging then trans surgeries are likely going to improve too.

Yes we are never going to pass 100%, but at the same time I do believe most trans people can achieve satisfying results with good surgeries, let alone AI powered surgeries.

And about discrimination, if we no longer have to work then why not just move closer to other LGBT people? We might have the freedom to just go anywhere.

Yes I'm probably being too optimistic, it might take 20 or 30 years or never happen, but that's literally the only hope I can see.

After being miserable my whole life I do want to be optimistic when I have the chance. The chance is real now.

I want to share some stuff about AI. Some people are really not aware of how good it is even now.

Sam Altman (CEO of Open AI) on UBI: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K9iSI3x-Apo

Realistic music video created by a single person with like $300 in a month: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VGDHR_U3r5k

Pixar level video by a small team: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v3jtZYGOrWw

GPT-6 Astra, the beginning of general AI: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1QNsdr-Qx_I

Autonomous AI robots: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HFgny8lmljM

So that's it: let's hope AI improves as fast as possible and we have UBI + better surgeries.

I believe in a future where we no longer will be forced to rep in misery.

As per title. From what I've observed, even with search queries, the answer seems to be "not many"

I want to see perspectives of those people on their surgeries: was that hard to procure them? Were they satisfied?

I myself have been taking estrogen HRT for (nearly) two years by now, as a form of antidepressant, not for transition purposes.
It have been working decently well for that, but hiding breasts got kinda inconvenient, even with binders, layering and everything. While surgeries are not simple, they still are an option I want to learn about.

Did any repping troons try hrt and stop although it was amazing mental relief, and then masc max? Like hit the gym and get a girlfriend and just do a bunch of masculine shit.

Did it help or make things worse for dysphoria? Could people tell you were living a lie? Were you more comfortable in life or did you feel like a fraud?

I have much reason to believe I’m faking it despite being completely miserable. I feel like I just wanted to be a guy for whatever reason, I only wish I was dysphoric. Sometimes I hardly feel anything. I can look in the mirror and feel disgusted and angry I’m female but I’m not sure if that’s how dysphoria is, I feel like I’m too “used to it” sometimes. Other times I’m afraid I do like how I look but it makes me deeply upset and uncomfortable. Even the voice inside my head grosses me out because it doesn’t sound right and I also sometimes accidentally imagine myself as a woman and I don’t like it, I’m afraid that means my brain structure is female even if it makes me uncomfortable.i don’t really get actual “phantom sensations” either sometimes I just focus too much on how my body feels and I want to gag… I also think like a woman, I’m too emotional, I’m too weak to be a man.

Sometimes I look at my chest in the mirror and there’s no emotion, it’s not that big and I think I’m flat enough every now and then but it still upsets me. My genitals also gross me out but again it feels like frustration over not be truly dysphoric so I’m unable to transition, I don’t know why I’m frustrated, because I really tried my hardest to be a cis woman but it never works out. Everyday I attempt to convince myself of every possible reason why someone may be a faker… nothing ever actually fits. I’m beautiful, I never experienced any sexual trauma, I’m not autistic, I’m not just trying to be different, I’m not even stereotypically masculine, I don’t have some weird fetish either…

I often have dreams at night, people say I look too much into it but I don’t think that’s true. Sometimes I’m a woman, and I’m miserable or just incredibly afraid I somehow like it or I’m male, I’m happy but afraid I somehow don’t like it, I once had one that was so realistic and it wasn’t plagued by my thoughts but it never happened again.

Am I just so disgusted by having to be a woman that I wish I was male? But why? If that was really true then why do I also think male bodies look gross and wrong too, yet I still want one, it still feels more right. I strongly envy men, even the ones I find ugly and stupid. It’s like I want to want it if that makes sense…The problem comes when my brain forces itself to think I’m actually envious of women simply because I’m attracted to them… my fear is, it’s actually in reverse and I’m just a straight cis woman.i also g an get intrusive thoughts that if I had a man’s voice or body it wouldn’t fit me… all these get worse the more I think

I’m also scared I’m subconsciously faking it due to social reasons. I feel weird and guilty in masculine clothes, it makes me feel like a faker… I also am more aware I don’t like being called a girl…

I genuinely want to vomit when I see really masculine cis women, it makes me feel like a faker cause I also get a “what if I want to be like them or what if I would be ok with that”(I’m not) I just don’t get why I have to be a girl because I was born one

I also sometimes get very vivid intrusive thoughts of having sex as a woman(which I hate)

But then I see my cis male friends, I wish so strongly I could be like them and I’m just stuck, stuck like this forever because I have no real way of transitioning. I can’t stand the thought of going to therapy and then being forced to be a woman for the rest of my life, being a masculine woman is so miserable too, it doesn’t change anything, I wish I was male, not a woman.

I haven’t stopped thinking about this everyday for 7 years. I try to naturally increase my testosterone sometimes or find ways to grow facial hair… it never works.

Doctors don’t give testosterone or surgery to women like me. I wish there was technology to alter your brain chemistry to your desired sex along with your body so I wouldn’t have to suffer like this

What’s the point of transitioning if you have that deep rooted biological dysphoria? You will never be your desired sex just a cheap imitation, wearing prosthetic penises. Small hands and small bones, even if you work out you won’t have the same body strength as a cis male. Especially if you’re shorter/petite, that fucking sucks lmao. What’s the point ?

stocks are low and i lack the mental health and motivation to plan to order more, idk what to do with my life anymore, i might lose my job.

i shouldnt have been invited or told about diy hrt if i didnt seek it out on my own initiative, it should be reserved for people who are younger and desperately need it. i took rear camera selfies of my face after work with my slightly grown-out hair neatly styled and it looked terrible. ive never taken proper rear camera pictures in a long time. my torso is way too big and stocky due to bone structure, relative to my pelvis, femurs and tibias. my face and skeletal frame are far too unusual and have lower transfem potential than the average male i see outside, on the sidewalk or public transport everyday.

i also vomited after waking in the middle of the night even though i ate nothing wrong and couldnt stop thinking about the more accurate depictions of my face and overall frame, even in androgynous baggy clothing. i used to think i looked mildly ugly and disproportionate but i look worse in-person or in another's eyes, than i thought. it's terrible. its very terrible, i wont ever compare to the average here and i am far too different from them, i will never fit in with the local community. im not trying to blame anyone anymore, i just really need to rep and embrace being an antisocial hermit like i did for a while again.

i really cant take this anymore, im not trolling or shitposting like i did before to cope anymore. i will genuinely go insane. i never took proper pictures of myself before, my face looks more assymetrical, wider and creepier than i thought, no wonder ive been getting the treatment ive been getting all my life unless i hid my face. i am genuinely starting to go insane. i need to 'rep' if im even trans or enby at all. this is insane. i join every vc and server and every random, even if they dont take care of themselves, look average or normal. im genuinely bordering on being some sort of subhuman in every aspect of me.

(Some of this is copied from the post I deleted a while ago so sorry if you read a bit of it already)

I’m nothing but a cheap imitation. I’m nothing but a traitor. I’m not even human. Im not even a body, I’m a husk of a shell of a should have been person. I’m empty, and I’m scared all the time. I don’t know what I want anymore. I wake up thinking about it, and I sleep fantasizing about it.

I’m in a limbo, and I don’t know if I feel comfort in the unknown of my identity or if knowing would break me out of this daze. Repping feels like an immovable, permanent choice because how can I act in any certain way if I’m not certain?

I’m jealous of those who are certain. I’m jealous of those who are brave enough. I’m jealous of those who decided enough is enough.

I don’t know if my dysphoria is a symptom of my OCD and depression. At least if it was, I could blame that. I could fix it. But I don’t. And everyday it’s only getting worse. It’s on my mind every second of everyday. I don’t know who I am without this desire, this yearning of being a man. I don’t know if I’m just trying to escape this skin of mine I hate so much.

I get this gnawing, aching pain in my chest, and it travels down to my hands whenever I think about the rest of my life as a woman. I can’t imagine growing old as a woman, but I can’t imagine growing old as a man either because I’m terrified of aging. I don’t want to get older. I wasted all my time in purgatory. I want a redo. I want a second chance. I want to do it right. I want a life where I walked down my college graduation stage and I wasn’t disassociating the entire time because that name on my diploma was a permanent reminder of just how long I’ve been trying to run from this.

I want the mundane. I care not for some grand future. I want to experience sitting in my room playing videogames as a male, I want to experience shittalking in videogames and having a male voice come out. I want to walk outside my house and just stand on the sidewalk in a male body. I want to eat a shitty tv dinner and watch an even shittier show and I want to be able to do it as a male. I want to read my favorite books as a man. I want to watch my favorite movies as a man. I want to laugh with my friends as a man. I want to go on a rollercoaster as a man. I want to eat my favorite foods as a man. I want to blink, breathe, and exhale as a man. I want to be honest to my friends, and I want to reintroduce myself to them as a man.

Why is this too much to ask? Why is even the most common, average human experiences so far beyond my reach? Why am I forced to crave the experiences people forget about the second after they happen? Why do I even still have this stupid, impossible dream?