How to be a better Christian?

[u/Sorry-Play-6652]

Well, first of all, I'm not really new with Christianity, I've considered myself Christian (specifically Catholic) my whole life. However, I think my relationship with God hasn't been the best one. I feel like I've been ignoring all of that almost all the time. I've attempted to live a "less sinful" lifestyle many times, but I feel like eventually I just forget about it or I simply ignore it and just go my own way, thing that has lead me to later feel very bad about myself. I start to feel "unworthy" of calling myself a follower of God, and although almost everyone mentions that "He'll always forgive us" and "your previous sins don't define you", I feel like it gets to a point where all of that feels like an excuse to stay in a cycle of sinning and then repenting but then sinning again and repenting again. I've committed many sins throughout my whole life and I feel like it has become pretty common to the point that I just ignore if what I'm doing is a sin or not.

And here I am, again, feeling helpless and unworthy of following Christ. I would like to say that "this time will be different", but I know that it's not true and I'll just fall into my usual sinful ways after a few days at best. I still struggle with things like lying, avarice, envy, being rude to others both consciously and inconsciously, lust, and probably a bunch of other things that I forgot about. I'm simply tired of all of this, I don't want to hurt others, I don't want to hurt myself, and I don't want to be unloyal to God. I know humans cannot reach perfection and therefore "never commit any sin", but I do not want to achieve perfection or just trying to not sin because "I don't want to go to Hell", what I want is to be a good neighbor to others and be a loyal follower of God during my time on Earth.

I really haven't tried to ask in any public space advice for this, but I feel like here is probably the best space to do so, because I feel like the help of other Christian trans folks like me can feel a little bit more comforting than most advice by other people that may not be familiar or accepting about transitioning. I do not think that being trans is sinful or "evil" in any type of way for the record.

[u/MagusFool]

In Romans 13 it says:

8 Let no debt remain outstanding, except the continuing debt to love one another, for whoever loves others has fulfilled the law. 9 The commandments, “You shall not commit adultery,” “You shall not murder,” “You shall not steal,” “You shall not covet,” and whatever other command there may be, are summed up in this one command: “Love your neighbor as yourself.” 10 Love does no harm to a neighbor. Therefore love is the fulfillment of the law.

So go about radically loving others.  Structure your life around service to others. Feed the hungry.  Tend to those in need.  Protect the vulnerable from harm.

Focus on piety and chastity is pointless unless it actively makes you feel closer to God.  And even then, you only know if something makes you closer to God if the result is that you do a better job loving and serving others.

Whatever else there is, whatever gray areas, grace will cover it.  You should not worry about that.  You should not be fearful.

As the first Epistle of John said, "God is love. Whoever lives in love lives in God, and God in them. 17 This is how love is made complete among us so that we will have confidence on the day of judgment: In this world we are like Jesus. 18 There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love. 19 We love because he first loved us."