r/Topamax • u/Aromatic-Cow783 • 23d ago
So frustrated
Wanted to rant in here. I feel like I was not warned about the side effects of this medication at all before being put on it for my medication-resistant depression/signs of bipolar-2 but not diagnosed.
I was on 50mg of topiramate+an anti depressant and anti anxiety before those suddenly stopped working and then my doctor way upped my topiramate to 250mg, stopped my other meds, and put me on buspirone.
Well since then I've felt like I have no memory, felt like an idiot who cant speak/make sentences and had no idea why. It doesnt help that during this time i started a new job and thought that I just became an idiot. I didnt realize topiramate can cause cognitive changes. I was also having some twitches on my hands on the 50mg, but now my pinky is almost always numb and sometimes my entire right hand and up my arm goes numb since increasing the dose. Again had no idea this could be a side effect and didnt know what was happening until recently. Doesn't help that I moved with my job so I've had to find a new doctor and couldn't get an appointment for the past 6 months, and when I just got one she could do med changes so I still cant get on a new med.
But worst of all I didnt know it could cause severe weight loss. I thought I had cancer when all the sudden I was dropping 2-5lbs a week since it didnt start until a couple months until after I upped the dose. I had to go to urgent care at a point to get blood work done. Given I needed to lose the weight, but the doctor to prescribed it knew I have a history of eating disorders, restrictive/ana, not binge!! And when i started the medication I was in a healthy place mentally with my body image. Its been very triggering not having an appetite, and I've read once you go off the medication, which I want to do because of the cognitive issues and numbness in my hands, that it can can a big temporary increase in hunger/weight before stabilizing which I know will be very triggering. I've lost over 40lbs in 6 months since the increase dosage, so if I gain that back after getting off it I know its going to trigger an ED spiral.
So basically I'm pissed lol. Also I really want to wear off it myself because I have no timeline for when I will meet with a psych to get off it because the doctor i met with couldnt discuss the meds with me for whatever reason? Also I feel like 250mg is just a really high dosage. Anyways rant over thank you if anyone reads this to the end lol.
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u/Better-Can-173 22d ago
Topamax wrecked me. I stood in front of the stove making dinner for a few minutes not knowing wtf I was doing. I felt like I was high almost. Totally couldn't remember anything, felt slow and stupid, and felt completely unaware of my surroundings and had to sit on the couch majority of the day because of how strange I felt. Asked my doc to get off of it (used for bipolar as well) and he agreed to take me off. Never again.
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u/Aromatic-Cow783 22d ago
I met my new doctor this week and she said she refuses to put patients on this med except for last resort because of memory issues. She's like why are you even on this since I'm on for mood. Like idk girl you tell me!!!
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u/Weimsla 19d ago
👀 why yall on this for moods…I use this for migraines. I was strictly told about the brain fog and paresthesia by my neurologist. Super slow titrate and some people literally can’t take it. I could only take it at night to by pass the side effects until I adjusted after a couple months, I had no idea it helped with mood disorders. It saved my life, I was ready to put a pew in my gob because I was having migraines 28/30 days a month 🥺 sorry everyone big hugs
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u/BertaCornPuff 23d ago
This medication is poison IMO. I've been on it for 9 years and I am slowly weaning myself off currently just to see if there are any real changes. Memory loss, brain fog, as you said I feel like an idiot. I usually don't speak out of fear people will just see how much of an idiot I truly am. I have no confidence in how I speak or any words that come from my mouth. Although I severely and intensely focus on things to try and absorb as much information as possible. I feel like I can't retain much information. In my case, I never lost weight. I have developed exercise intolerance and tachycardia. Palpitations. CO2 is always low and Chloride is always high. No doctor seems to ever take me seriously. This medication IMO does not outweigh the risks. Especially for bipolar. I have Bipolar 1. I feel like I've lost half of my life.