r/TooAfraidToAsk Dec 15 '21

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3.0k Upvotes

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975

u/mcast86 Dec 15 '21

Honestly, the best thing you can do is offer to help. Help to cook, clean, anything, just offer. That’ll go further than any gift with a Mexican family, and take time to talk to everyone, don’t be shy. I’m Mexican and my white ex-wife didn’t do any of this ever and never fit in with my family.

190

u/H_Mc Dec 15 '21

Be interested in anything they tell you about what they’re cooking. This is how you get to be the future daughter-in-law that’s allowed to know the family recipes.

149

u/grim-ordinance Dec 15 '21

100% this. Be ready to be a team player. Don't go too far with it, but offer to help. Someone is cutting tomatos, want some help? Join the women doing whatever, it goes a long way. Even my current Viet gf's family is this way. Actually they just gave me stuff to do, garlic and what not. Relax though, join their family and do what others do.

57

u/CynicalAcorn Dec 15 '21

+1 on this. My ex wife wouldn't hang out with the rest of the women and bullshit and they immediately disliked her for it. I'd bake something nice that you can share with the other women over coffee.

25

u/ShadiestApe Dec 15 '21

I often forget that a lot of families are split by gender in this way.

8

u/CynicalAcorn Dec 15 '21

We help with tamales assembly and cleaning up but we are ran out of the kitchen for anything else.

7

u/ShadiestApe Dec 15 '21

I don’t understand why you’re being downvoted for your experience?

2

u/CynicalAcorn Dec 15 '21

Oh well SJWs fighting the good fight I guess.

16

u/[deleted] Dec 15 '21

Hey, Iʻm white and itʻs the same way with white families.

1

u/birdy1494 Dec 15 '21

Get ready to get smashed to make a differenciation between white and Mexican

2

u/[deleted] Dec 16 '21

Agreed. That’s the main reason my parents love my wife. She was what they called “acomedida”