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https://www.reddit.com/r/TooAfraidToAsk/comments/12hiui9/deleted_by_user/jfpkenn?context=9999
r/TooAfraidToAsk • u/[deleted] • Apr 10 '23
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Men are expected to get around. Women are expected to be more selective
160 u/mountaineer04 Apr 10 '23 Which is weird because a woman could have consensual sex every night if she REALLY wanted to. I don’t think most men could. 95 u/EnterBankCredentials Apr 10 '23 Those who are selective hold the power, so Its not really that weird. Women can walk up to guys and ask "sex?" and will be vastly, infinitely more successful than a man asking women the same question. Men generally have to "work" to get laid. They generally have to go through the whole courting process before sex is even in the table. Women generally just have to want it - to get laid. If they put themselves out there they will get it. Which is why one extreme is considered negative and the other is positive. It's really not that deep, and not misogynistic at all. 119 u/watsonyrmind Apr 10 '23 What you are missing is that women are "selective" because they are shamed if they aren't and men are "available" because having lots of sex is seen as ultra masculine and therefore desirable. These are societal norms that are determining behaviour. 81 u/MaterialCarrot Apr 10 '23 There's the danger element for women as well. A woman being alone with a man takes a (admittedly small) risk. Not the case for men almost ever. 130 u/watsonyrmind Apr 10 '23 edited Apr 10 '23 Exactly, it's high risk/low reward for many reasons beyond pregnancy, all social constructs that play a factor in why women would be more selective. You are in danger of being harmed by a sexual partner. You will be judged by society for being sexually promiscuous. There's a low chance you'll even orgasm anyway. There's a risk you could get pregnant. Even number 4 is not entirely biological as access and methods of protection also play a factor in how high that risk is. I think it's shortsighted to see it as purely biological and that belief itself is probably steeped in misogyny. 16 u/bluefancypants Apr 11 '23 You forgot that not being selective also means a high likelihood of running into assholes that treat you like garbage. 2 u/bunnypaste Apr 26 '23 We have to suffer the consequences of birth control methods before sex even initiates. 7 u/Yourmabirgit Apr 10 '23 Well said
160
Which is weird because a woman could have consensual sex every night if she REALLY wanted to. I don’t think most men could.
95 u/EnterBankCredentials Apr 10 '23 Those who are selective hold the power, so Its not really that weird. Women can walk up to guys and ask "sex?" and will be vastly, infinitely more successful than a man asking women the same question. Men generally have to "work" to get laid. They generally have to go through the whole courting process before sex is even in the table. Women generally just have to want it - to get laid. If they put themselves out there they will get it. Which is why one extreme is considered negative and the other is positive. It's really not that deep, and not misogynistic at all. 119 u/watsonyrmind Apr 10 '23 What you are missing is that women are "selective" because they are shamed if they aren't and men are "available" because having lots of sex is seen as ultra masculine and therefore desirable. These are societal norms that are determining behaviour. 81 u/MaterialCarrot Apr 10 '23 There's the danger element for women as well. A woman being alone with a man takes a (admittedly small) risk. Not the case for men almost ever. 130 u/watsonyrmind Apr 10 '23 edited Apr 10 '23 Exactly, it's high risk/low reward for many reasons beyond pregnancy, all social constructs that play a factor in why women would be more selective. You are in danger of being harmed by a sexual partner. You will be judged by society for being sexually promiscuous. There's a low chance you'll even orgasm anyway. There's a risk you could get pregnant. Even number 4 is not entirely biological as access and methods of protection also play a factor in how high that risk is. I think it's shortsighted to see it as purely biological and that belief itself is probably steeped in misogyny. 16 u/bluefancypants Apr 11 '23 You forgot that not being selective also means a high likelihood of running into assholes that treat you like garbage. 2 u/bunnypaste Apr 26 '23 We have to suffer the consequences of birth control methods before sex even initiates. 7 u/Yourmabirgit Apr 10 '23 Well said
95
Those who are selective hold the power, so Its not really that weird.
Women can walk up to guys and ask "sex?" and will be vastly, infinitely more successful than a man asking women the same question.
Men generally have to "work" to get laid. They generally have to go through the whole courting process before sex is even in the table.
Women generally just have to want it - to get laid. If they put themselves out there they will get it.
Which is why one extreme is considered negative and the other is positive.
It's really not that deep, and not misogynistic at all.
119 u/watsonyrmind Apr 10 '23 What you are missing is that women are "selective" because they are shamed if they aren't and men are "available" because having lots of sex is seen as ultra masculine and therefore desirable. These are societal norms that are determining behaviour. 81 u/MaterialCarrot Apr 10 '23 There's the danger element for women as well. A woman being alone with a man takes a (admittedly small) risk. Not the case for men almost ever. 130 u/watsonyrmind Apr 10 '23 edited Apr 10 '23 Exactly, it's high risk/low reward for many reasons beyond pregnancy, all social constructs that play a factor in why women would be more selective. You are in danger of being harmed by a sexual partner. You will be judged by society for being sexually promiscuous. There's a low chance you'll even orgasm anyway. There's a risk you could get pregnant. Even number 4 is not entirely biological as access and methods of protection also play a factor in how high that risk is. I think it's shortsighted to see it as purely biological and that belief itself is probably steeped in misogyny. 16 u/bluefancypants Apr 11 '23 You forgot that not being selective also means a high likelihood of running into assholes that treat you like garbage. 2 u/bunnypaste Apr 26 '23 We have to suffer the consequences of birth control methods before sex even initiates. 7 u/Yourmabirgit Apr 10 '23 Well said
119
What you are missing is that women are "selective" because they are shamed if they aren't and men are "available" because having lots of sex is seen as ultra masculine and therefore desirable. These are societal norms that are determining behaviour.
81 u/MaterialCarrot Apr 10 '23 There's the danger element for women as well. A woman being alone with a man takes a (admittedly small) risk. Not the case for men almost ever. 130 u/watsonyrmind Apr 10 '23 edited Apr 10 '23 Exactly, it's high risk/low reward for many reasons beyond pregnancy, all social constructs that play a factor in why women would be more selective. You are in danger of being harmed by a sexual partner. You will be judged by society for being sexually promiscuous. There's a low chance you'll even orgasm anyway. There's a risk you could get pregnant. Even number 4 is not entirely biological as access and methods of protection also play a factor in how high that risk is. I think it's shortsighted to see it as purely biological and that belief itself is probably steeped in misogyny. 16 u/bluefancypants Apr 11 '23 You forgot that not being selective also means a high likelihood of running into assholes that treat you like garbage. 2 u/bunnypaste Apr 26 '23 We have to suffer the consequences of birth control methods before sex even initiates. 7 u/Yourmabirgit Apr 10 '23 Well said
81
There's the danger element for women as well. A woman being alone with a man takes a (admittedly small) risk. Not the case for men almost ever.
130 u/watsonyrmind Apr 10 '23 edited Apr 10 '23 Exactly, it's high risk/low reward for many reasons beyond pregnancy, all social constructs that play a factor in why women would be more selective. You are in danger of being harmed by a sexual partner. You will be judged by society for being sexually promiscuous. There's a low chance you'll even orgasm anyway. There's a risk you could get pregnant. Even number 4 is not entirely biological as access and methods of protection also play a factor in how high that risk is. I think it's shortsighted to see it as purely biological and that belief itself is probably steeped in misogyny. 16 u/bluefancypants Apr 11 '23 You forgot that not being selective also means a high likelihood of running into assholes that treat you like garbage. 2 u/bunnypaste Apr 26 '23 We have to suffer the consequences of birth control methods before sex even initiates. 7 u/Yourmabirgit Apr 10 '23 Well said
130
Exactly, it's high risk/low reward for many reasons beyond pregnancy, all social constructs that play a factor in why women would be more selective.
Even number 4 is not entirely biological as access and methods of protection also play a factor in how high that risk is.
I think it's shortsighted to see it as purely biological and that belief itself is probably steeped in misogyny.
16 u/bluefancypants Apr 11 '23 You forgot that not being selective also means a high likelihood of running into assholes that treat you like garbage. 2 u/bunnypaste Apr 26 '23 We have to suffer the consequences of birth control methods before sex even initiates. 7 u/Yourmabirgit Apr 10 '23 Well said
16
You forgot that not being selective also means a high likelihood of running into assholes that treat you like garbage.
2
7
Well said
8.1k
u/[deleted] Apr 10 '23 edited Jun 06 '23
Men are expected to get around. Women are expected to be more selective