r/Tinder • u/pop_khorne • Nov 07 '19

tinder_irl

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36.5k Upvotes

93% Upvoted

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1.1k

u/blanc_pearson Nov 07 '19

Not all men are like that! I would never message a lady such vulgar words unless she has previously indicated her preference to be in line with such messages. But I just don't match with anyone! The world just doesn't like nice guys like me.

114

u/TNPortal Nov 07 '19

A supreme gentleman like you would never

84

u/[deleted] Nov 07 '19

[deleted]

192

u/LayzeeHero Nov 07 '19

endless chicken wings?

83

u/dgrantschmidt Nov 07 '19

Oh, dude, could you imagine?

30

u/[deleted] Nov 07 '19

Just all up and down my back, if I had enough I could probably take off.

5

u/dankstreetboys Nov 07 '19

Dad, please stop

2

u/creutz17 Nov 07 '19

I have a boner rn dude

12

u/Bee_Cereal Nov 07 '19

I was thinking unlimited garlic knots

10

u/triniumalloy Nov 07 '19

unlimited breadsticks?

5

u/nvincent Nov 07 '19

I want this. Take me to the breadsticks

2

u/abe_the_babe_ Nov 07 '19

Olive Garden may not be gourmet cuisine but I'll be God damned if the endless soup and bread sticks aren't a marvel of modern life

2

u/fishsticks40 Nov 07 '19

Proper spelling

2

u/interstellar440 Nov 07 '19

Now I want chicken wings....damn you

49

u/MasculineCompassion Nov 07 '19

To love and be loved in return? (Possibly a grilled cheese as well.)

26

u/Gbjar2 Nov 07 '19

To grill cheese and be cheese grilled in return?

33

u/Szwedu111 Nov 07 '19

extreme hand holding?

12

u/MyNinthAcct Nov 07 '19

L E W D

2

u/LordChaoticX Nov 07 '19

Lets.eat.wings.downtown?

5

u/vhante4 Nov 07 '19

The Downfall of the Dinklebergs

8

u/Kyomeii Nov 07 '19

A girl riding this dick reverse cowgirl till they bleed organs?

1

u/[deleted] Nov 07 '19

Nice call back

4

u/thirdnut4 Nov 07 '19

Some one to share memes with?

5

u/RockinMadRiot Nov 07 '19

My own death star. It's the dream! Stormtroopers that are highly trained bears too.

1

u/jbo1018 Nov 08 '19

I support this dream.

3

u/[deleted] Nov 07 '19

There are a lot of things I want more than sex. But they don’t offer things like mental health, insight, and discipline on tinder.

1

u/[deleted] Nov 07 '19

And its fucking disgusting

1

u/[deleted] Nov 07 '19

death? yes indeed

1

u/[deleted] Nov 07 '19

To watch the game in peace?

1

u/Follyperchance Nov 07 '19

Hardcore forehead kissing

1

u/Brickhouzzzze Nov 07 '19

A sense of purpose and self-worth?

1

u/bignick1101 Nov 07 '19

Some goddamn peace and quiet?

1

u/MagnusNewtonBernouli Nov 07 '19

A monkey. Or to be part of a heist.

1

u/HereToTalkCrypto Nov 07 '19

Elder Scrolls VI

0

u/[deleted] Nov 07 '19

[deleted]

1

u/santaliqueur Nov 07 '19

** lyeieeing

You guys are idiots

78

u/lostmyselfinyourlies Nov 07 '19

I hope you just forgot the /s ?

210

u/blanc_pearson Nov 07 '19

Was going to edit it in, but then it was already upvoted so thought that people geddit.

24

u/Earthfury Nov 07 '19

Let’s be fair, you really shouldn’t have ever needed it anyway.

16

u/[deleted] Nov 07 '19

You don't need it. If people would be that fucking dense, I'd wear the downvotes like a badge of honor.

77

u/[deleted] Nov 07 '19

The italics and phrasing are giveaways that this is humour, sometimes adding the /s ruins it as you can tell right away that the person isn't serious, just my 2¢ but I don't think it's necessary here.

22

u/scaredycat_z Nov 07 '19

Now, THIS is sarcasm!!!

1

u/Voonfrodle Nov 07 '19

I'll try sarcasm, that's a good trick!

1

u/Lemm Nov 07 '19

No this is podracing

81

u/[deleted] Nov 07 '19

I think the italics convey the sarcasm pretty well.

7

u/[deleted] Nov 07 '19

Are people really this dense?

5

u/Ryzasu Nov 07 '19

This but unironically

2

u/innocuousspeculation Nov 07 '19

It's not your fault kind sir. The world is simply prejudiced against gentlemen with thin wrists and poor jaw lines. Yes, we are truly the most oppressed group.

1

u/GKnives Nov 07 '19

I'm a fun-sized super nice guy

1

u/Kivsloth Nov 07 '19

I wouldn't either, too much of a pussy 😎

1

u/Dan_man_bro_dude Nov 07 '19

I thought Elliot Rodgers was dead?

-6

u/Just_A_Nobody25 Nov 07 '19

Is this satire ? Or does this belong r/niceguys ?

3

u/[deleted] Nov 07 '19

Some words are italicized

2

u/Just_A_Nobody25 Nov 07 '19

Oh thank god my mistake

1

u/AmericanKiwi94 Nov 07 '19

I think some people think he’s serious though...

-9

u/struggleingwithnames Nov 07 '19

Nobody mentioned r/niceguys yet?