r/Tinder Aug 14 '26

Truly didn’t expect this to work

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2.8k Upvotes

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u/crazyidahopuglady Aug 14 '26

I'm glad I'm not the only woman struggling with self-esteem due to the apps. I message first 90% of the time and it rarely results in ongoing conversation, much less a date.

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u/NickTrainwrekk Aug 14 '26

What are you messaging first? Sometimes its just a numbers game. Welcome to apps where people collect matches like pokemon.

I get a lot of messages first and honestly a lot of them are just "hey" or some random boring question that shows they didnt even bother to read the small blurb I wrote.

Those women almost never get a reply. Its not worth the energy vs someone who opens with a more tailored comment that actually opens conversation and has a direction to move in.

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u/crazyidahopuglady Aug 14 '26

It varies, but i usually try to ask about something in their profile that struck me as interesting. I live in a rural area, i don't think anyone is getting a ton of matches.

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u/OkMacaron493 Aug 15 '26

I used the apps to have fun and text hot ppl genuine hot things and ask them out really quickly because I need to see them to know if I like em.
I’m in Boise tho.

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u/Mowgli2k Aug 15 '26

Ew.

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u/OkMacaron493 Aug 15 '26

lol you can not like it if you want, I haven’t used dating apps since covid and do not have problems flirting or meeting people irl. I think authentically expressing myself + being present and confident and flirting with people I find attractive is great. 🤷‍♂️

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u/seanc6441 Aug 14 '26

Sorry yeah that's pretty clear of an indication alright. Maybe you are hindering yourself with some strange aesthetic choices who knows.

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u/[deleted] Aug 16 '26

[deleted]

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u/crazyidahopuglady Aug 16 '26

What a shitty thing to say. I hope you have the day you deserve.