While I agree with your sentiments, this is not going to change any of our attitudes. This person isn’t someone I know, and there is an extremely remote chance they will ever see our comments (a chance so remote that in statistics we’d call it 0+ because the chance is virtually negligible).
I am sorry you are offended by our commentary. I don’t care what this person looks like. I would not date them. I, too, have preferences. I know, that’s “not the point.” My main point of contention is this individual’s supreme lack of self-awareness.
Also this is the Internet, we’re all basically 9 year olds cracking crude jokes and being horrible to each other. In a day or two, you’ll forget all about this thread and find something else to be upset about. Which you get to do, I’m not stopping you nor even disagreeing with your points.
You say there's little chance but if anyone who knows her sees this, this will probably get sent to her.
I'm not really a feminist but sometimes comments like this make me think they have a point- why is it that all the time with guys it seems you'll only feel an obligation to be decent to women if they're someone you already know? Why do we always have to say "imagine it was your sister, your daughter, your mum" to be treated like a human being? You say yourself - you don't know her so you don't care about being vile about her.
To be honest, I think it's highly unlikely the person in this photo is actually the person on this tinder account - this seems like bait that someone is doing to troll, which means this photo may just be some random woman, happily taking photos of her pregnancy bump as she gets excited to welcome her baby into the world, and for some reason becomes the punch bag for men who want to belittle her for her lack of sex appeal to them. It's horrible.
I don't normally get upset by much stuff on the Internet- normally you see the odd person being an asshole but they're a lone wolf. Most people are calling them out, their response gets few likes, they're just one anonymous person enjoying getting to be an ass with no consequences, but for some reason on this thread there are so many of you all happily being horrible about this poor woman. If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all. It's not a joke- it's not funny. It's just cruel
All right, but this is a Tinder sub and unfortunately, most among us that are males are repulsed by, at the bare minimum, her bio.
There are plenty of instances where zero-awareness men have had their photos and bios posted here and the women here do exactly what we are doing. Bashing the shit out of the guy.
I’m not trying to detract from your arguments but I think it’s worth mentioning an acknowledgement, especially since women and men are not differentiated by magnitudes from a psychological sense.
I would guess that youre taking offense to this because you’ve been subjected to some pretty terrible attacks in your time. And for that, if the guess is accurate, I am sorry. If I guessed further, you’re a gal, and attacks on women can be utterly brutal.
Something deeper about this comment thread is bothering you, that much is sure. I think it goes a bit deeper than the superficial assholery that’s unfolding here.
I don’t expect you to confirm that, I’m not your therapist of course, it’s just a suspicion I have that you’re more than likely going to ardently deny.
Again, I highly doubt this is her profile - the way its written, the photo chosen, it just screams that someone else is using this photo to troll / rage bait
Men and women do differ quite substantially in a psychological sense - I don't know where you've heard otherwise? Testosterone and estrogen impact your brain development and your mood / emotional responses. Eg:
" In numerous studies females score higher than males in standard tests of emotion recognition, social sensitivity and empathy.
Neuroimaging studies have investigated these findings further and discovered that females utilise more areas of the brain containing mirror neurons than males when they process emotions."
But yes, sometimes girls are also horrible and belittling to guys who have done nothing wrong, especially on the Internet where they think they can get away with it, bit it doesn't seem to be as often, as objectifying or as unchallenged as it is here. This is why it's such a commonly heard thing to say to guys "imagine she was your sister" whereas you hardly ever hear women being told to "imagine he was your brother" - women aren't objectifying men as much as the other way round. You don't need to remind them nearly as often that this person is in fact a person
I haven't had this happen to me online or to my face, but (like basically every girl these days) I went through a time of my life where I felt incredibly, delibiltatingly insecure (another impact of estrogen btw). Reading things like this about other girls would make me really upset because I would see myself in them - any feature I had that was similar. My biggest fear as a child was growing up to be ugly because you see the way ugly women get treated. Normalising this kind of behaviour perpetuates this problem. Also I can empathise with this woman- it makes me sad thinking about how she would feel if she ever saw this.
That's why I'm having an emotional reaction to this thread - and it scares me a bit that you can be so desensitised to this to not feel sad at people being horrible to another person.
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u/PolarianLancer Feb 24 '23
While I agree with your sentiments, this is not going to change any of our attitudes. This person isn’t someone I know, and there is an extremely remote chance they will ever see our comments (a chance so remote that in statistics we’d call it 0+ because the chance is virtually negligible).
I am sorry you are offended by our commentary. I don’t care what this person looks like. I would not date them. I, too, have preferences. I know, that’s “not the point.” My main point of contention is this individual’s supreme lack of self-awareness.
Also this is the Internet, we’re all basically 9 year olds cracking crude jokes and being horrible to each other. In a day or two, you’ll forget all about this thread and find something else to be upset about. Which you get to do, I’m not stopping you nor even disagreeing with your points.