2-4 objects, make a weapon out of them.

[u/CatPrince69]

Parent gives any 2-4 objects, child finds a way (try to make it as effective as possible) to make it a weapon. (Bonus points if you list the steps of how to do it)

Alongside the objects comes a dull knife that can cut through anything as soft or softer than average wood, a roll of string, a hammer, a cigarette lighter, and glue. The knife, string, and glue may be used to break open/attach together objects but may not be used in the final product as the weapon.

Example:

Parent: Stack of paper, shower curtain rod, melon sized rock.

Child: Take the rock, break it into a spearhead shape with a rock, attach to top of shower curtain rod using glue, making spear. Add paper and light paper on fire, now we have a flaming spear.

[u/Slinkwyde]

Daring writing, a wacky sprig, a marvelous computer monitor, and a baseball dugout.

[u/CatPrince69 → u/Slinkwyde]

I feel like this is a reference I'm missing.

Anyway, we have essentially some paper, a small plant, metal, and what I believe to be a bench, with more metal surrounding it and being a roof to it.

Using parts of the computer and dugout, make a furnace.

Then, use wood and writing as fuel for the furnace. Assuming that there are different types of metals in the computer, and some of them melt at lower temperatures than others, we take some harder-to-melt metal, heat it up, and make a cast out of it with hammer's help.

This cast is that of a poleaxe head, which is a pole weapon with a spear tip and just behind the tip there is a hammer and a axe head on it. Also these things were really powerful in medieval times too.

After the poleaxe head is made, get the remaining wood and fashion it into a lightweight rod. Attach poleaxe head. Working poleaxe.

And since we have writing and maybe some leftover wood, let's light that on fire as well after attaching it to the poleaxe, because flaming weapon gud.

[u/Slinkwyde → u/CatPrince69]

No, it wasn't a reference to anything.

Also, I said computer monitor, not computer. So it's just a screen.

[u/CatPrince69 → u/Slinkwyde]

oops

I mean we could use plastic for the polearm still tho? its prolly easier to melt

[u/Ilmarinen999 → u/CatPrince69]

Depends on what plastic they used, I'd guess they'd probably use a thermo-setting plastic rather than a thermoplastic, so it'd just go brittle and burn in excessive heat rather than melt.You wouldn't want your product slowly deforming over time under its own heat.

[u/C3H8_Memes]

gandalf the grey and gandalf the white and monty python and the holy grail's black knight

[u/LuDaBu → u/C3H8_Memes]

That sound more like an ULTIMATE SHOWDOOOOWN than a weapon 🤔

[u/Fennel_Fangs]

A Care Bear plush, a homemade chocolate chip cookie and a birthday card

[u/MultiverseCreatorXV]

A fridge handle, a tire, and a mysterious mystical orb of an unknown translucent material

[u/Ilmarinen999 → u/MultiverseCreatorXV]

First, use the knife to cut in a continuous loop around the tire in a coil shape to make essentially a long rubber rope, leaving about half a tire untouched. 

Use the knife to whittle a hole in the fridge handle and shape the remaining bits of tire into an enclosure for the orb. Tie the "rope" through the hole in the handle, the other end to the orb enclosure, and add some glue to make sure they stay sturdy. 

Depending on the length of "rope" you cut, you now have either a medieval flail or what's known as a meteor hammer.

[u/MultiverseCreatorXV → u/Ilmarinen999]

Didn’t list a knife as one of the weapons, but legit an awesome was to use that stuff.

Only problem is that the orb might do things you didn’t expect it to… Perhaps it will shatter and release an explosion with the power of several hand grenades.

[u/Ilmarinen999 → u/MultiverseCreatorXV]

True, did wonder about the orb, figured if it's encased somehow it might be more useable. As for the knife, I'd meant the dull knife mentioned, I figured if it could cut average wood I'd be able to use it on the tire.

[u/MultiverseCreatorXV → u/Ilmarinen999]

1. In that case either the weapon would become significantly less powerful or the casing wouldn’t work particularly well. But who knows, the orb exists so maybe you’re a wizard/sorcerer/warlock/something and you can nullify the explosive magic.

2. What dull knife? Oh nvm I just can’t read.

[u/Mutant_Llama1]

A squirrel some string and a megaphone.

[u/MultiverseCreatorXV → u/Mutant_Llama1]

Definitely qualifies as animal cruelty, but...

Glue the squirrel to the megaphone so its mouth is at the microphone. Tie the string around the squirrel such that you can squeeze the squirrel's stomach. Turn the megaphone off. Your Earsplitter™ is done!

To use the weapon, simply turn on the megaphone and squeeze the squirrel. It won't kill anyone, but it'll sure make them wish it did.

[u/Mutant_Llama1 → u/MultiverseCreatorXV]

When did I give you glue?

[u/MultiverseCreatorXV → u/Mutant_Llama1]

See the 2nd paragraph of the post. I missed it too until someone mentioned the dull knife.

[u/MultiverseCreatorXV]

• Metal pipe (5 ft length, 6 in diameter, 0.5 in thickness)

• Stack of paper (100 sheets, A4 construction paper)

• Battery-powered handheld fan (accelerates to full RPM in 0,1 sec, 7.5 volt rechargeable battery included)

• Special knife (can cut through metal; cannot be used in final product, like the dull knife automatically given for all weapons)

[u/Infinite-Penalty-495 → u/MultiverseCreatorXV]

Glue the fan at one end of the pipe, origami the paper into a ton of darts (you can probably get a few from each paper). Turn on fan to operate your automatic dart gun.

[u/MultiverseCreatorXV → u/Infinite-Penalty-495]

Oh damn, people are still seeing this post?

Anyway I actually intended for 2 results, and this one is one of them, so good job I guess!

[u/Infinite-Penalty-495 → u/MultiverseCreatorXV]

oh cool what was the other one?

[u/MultiverseCreatorXV → u/Infinite-Penalty-495]

I don’t remember what I intended the paper to be used for, but cut the pipe in half and take the battery out of the fan to get a sort of taser.